Being a RPW

trnflln · 2017-01-16T00:18:25+00:00

Something about this is reading a little bit like it's fake to me. Apologies if I'm wrong... but... yeah.

ZimmermannsHammer · 2017-01-15T18:24:55+00:00

Nope 23 is not Wall. You might appear too much like a "knows nothing feminine girl". Happened to me too. You are pure. STEM is good for women too, most just never consider them (Yes, Schools I am looking at you!)

Sunshine12e · 2017-01-16T00:31:49+00:00

Eh, at 23 you have plenty of time to get married. Perosnally, I married at 18 and it was a mistake. Years later, divorced in my 30's and still could have gotten remarried and started all over again.

NittanyLioness84 · 2017-01-15T18:49:23+00:00

only losers are not married by 25.

Well, I won't bother giving advice because no one wants to hear what a loser has to say.

Galadriel26 · 2017-01-15T18:52:52+00:00

I think you are good RPW material. You are here after all. You should read the "feminine frame of mind" in the sidebar, a good place to start! Also very uplifting comments from men in that commentary section.

But there are many negative things about your posts that I am concerned about that has nothing to do with RP. You seem a bit "too certain" that everything sucks for you right now. Even though I would say you seem to be doing great! Might you be a bit depressed....? Sorry for asking.

(Also, excuse me for being a loser in your mind, as I am not married by 25. :P)

xelaandra23 · 2017-01-16T00:02:09+00:00

I like your lifestyle a lot. Outside of work, I love to volunteer and attend church, as well. Let's be honest - it's about all I have time for (but I have really demanding job).

Anyway, I think you're doing everything right. And I don't know where you get the idea that only losers aren't married by 25. It isn't 1960. Things have changed - a lot. I'm 26 and still single because I'm still working on getting more established in my career (I graduated law school in '15) before I seriously pursue marriage.

You're doing fine. I also think it's great that you've maintained sexual purity. I'm the same way. I go on dates, but I refuse to put out. It's important, especially as you get older. The main reason girls over 25 are seen as undesirable by some men is that they're often really impure by that point. If you're going to settle down in your late 20s or your 30s, maintain your purity and you'll be OK.

onacasserole · 2017-01-16T02:34:51+00:00

Pump the breaks! You're 23 and single, not 40 and single.

Three big things stand out to me in what you've written, and it could be that a combination of these factors is keeping eligible men away:

You have little to no experience being friends with men other than that one guy. Do you know how hard it is to go fishing if you've never seen fish, or water, or a boat, or a fishing rod? I know RPW teaches that men and women can't be friends, and I agree to an extent. However, being friendly and hanging out with different types of guys who you aren't dating may just give you the confidence/practice you need to relate to men.
You say that the men in your field assume you're a ditz who will drop out. Your writing, however, reflects a highly intelligent and serious woman who is very self-possessed. This makes me think they are making assumptions based purely on your girly appearance. How often do you strike up random conversations, joke with co-workers, or otherwise let your true personality out? If you're letting your personality out at all they should quickly see that you're not a ditz.
You seem to take life very seriously. Being goal oriented is good, but taking every life event SO seriously can be unattractive to men (and women). You reference a guy ruining your "emotional virginity", refer to yourself as old, talk about how certain types of people are losers, etc. Being judgmental and overly serious translates to the world, you may feel you keep those thoughts guarded, but you're wrong.

If you work on being less judgmental and learn to be a bit lighter and enjoy things in the moment I think you'll see big changes. Sure, some women need RPW because they piss away their 20s and think they'll easily find a super hot Chad at 38, have kids at 40, etc. THOSE women need a wakeup call to prioritize what they want. You're sort of the opposite. You're so serious and so goal oriented that I think it may be preventing you from attracting guys who just want the time to hang out, get to know you, not feel judged, have fun, and then eventually fall in love and get married.

PinkTulipz · 2017-01-15T19:02:45+00:00

You don't need to change your whole life around to have red pill values. I'm also a computer science major/programmer, and I've never considered it a threat to my femininity. I'd even consider myself more feminine than almost all of my acquaintes that took up social science degrees - likely in part because those tend to encourage the new wave of social justice, but I won't go too into that.

23 is not the wall by any means. I do have to say, however, that it isn't great to have too little romantic experience by early to mid 20s. Even taking rpw advice, we are all still individuals and need experience to learn what we do/do not want in a partner. A lot of which can't all be covered here - this is simply a solid guideline.

Go on a few dates with men you find suitable. Don't emotionally invest in men who won't do the same with you. Learn about yourself and put the tips here to real life practice. You're on a good track.

"Emotional virginity". It's normal to not have feelings reciprocated at some point in your life. I wouldn't attach the concept of virginity to that.

blackButterflymb · 2017-01-15T18:59:46+00:00

RPW isn't a group in my opinion. It's just a place where sexual strategy is discussed and advice is given on how to use it to our advantage. It contains ideologies that you can incorporate into your life basically.

Just read the posts on the sidebar and ask feel free to ask questions lol. I would recommend starting with the post that speaks on the feminine frame of mind.

MsSadieDunham · 2017-01-15T22:49:35+00:00

RPW is not a set of rules to follow, like women shall only wear dresses and shall not work in STEM. It doesn't appear you really understand what this praxeology is all about.

deadsandsushi · 2017-01-15T23:35:33+00:00

I'm 36 and haven't hit this wall yet. What am I missing?

Willow-girl · 2017-01-16T01:07:39+00:00

Look, dating and mating is basically a number game. The more men you meet, the more likely you are to find one that you 'click' with (mutual chemistry). If your job and social circle don't bring you into contact with many prospective mates, you need to branch out a bit. Join a gym, take a class of some sort or do the Internet dating thing. Meet lots of people! (Remember that it's easy for a guy to stand out in a crowd of one.)

Some dates will be duds, sure, but look at them as an opportunity to practice your conversational and social skills. Sometimes even if you don't 'click' with a guy, it can be a fun experience. Years ago when I was single, I dated an ex-Marine who was very into fitness (not my thing at all) and who taught me how to rollerblade! Now, that is not something I would have done on my own, lol.

thrown_33829_away · 2017-01-24T03:32:07+00:00

You mentioned "we are too emotional" yet none of your comments betray emotion. Could some level of depression be lurking under your comments?

I'd suggest you get some relationship advice from a therapist - or even visit someone familiar with cognitive behavioral therapy. You could mention your need for relationship help, and discuss your 2 year fixation on the guy in college who wasn't interested. I think there's some additional layers to this that can't be unraveled on a forum, but in person with a therapist you might make some discoveries.

Have you seen enough courtroom dramas to know about "doctor - patient privilege"? Just as you are anonymous here, discussions with a therapist are private. Maybe if depression or other issues are also having an impact, a therapist could at least help you become aware of them - even if you don't make it an ongoing thing. Good luck.

HypatiaCade · 2017-01-15T23:53:13+00:00

Oh dear, you still have plenty of time. IMO, the "wall" applies mostly to party girls who end up disheveled, smoke-preserved, and worn out. Mutton dressed as lamb, IYKWIM.

The way I see it, you have two issues.

1 Fishing in the wrong pond I worked in a female field. I had to step outside my field, into online dating to find my beloved. You might try online. As a professional, I would recommend networking events, young professional leagues, your city's young Republican association, or a young religious group as applicable.

2 You obviously have the external aspect covered. But what atmosphere do you cultivate? Are you relaxed, welcoming, a restful person? Or are you restless? Forgive me if this is off-base, but you seem to be worrying about what you have not "accomplished" in relationships. Worrying =/= welcoming.

Trust me when I say that it doesn't matter if you've had one relationship or five. When you meet the one, marry and become one flesh, one in heart with your One, it's like the first day of your life.

Title	Being a RPW
Author	redlemonade55
Upvotes	0
Comments	51
Date	January 15, 2017 6:21 PM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/5o5etf/being_a_rpw/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/being-a-rpw.86845 https://theredarchive.com/post/86845

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