Does real love exist?

Mojo5powers · 2024-06-03T16:18:36+00:00

I'd guess that very few people in happy and healthy relationships create entire threads online ranting and raving about how in love they are. We only hear the bad stuff and when people are looking for advice with problems. I'm madly in love with my partner but recognize the amount of patience and work relationships are.

I always have liked looking at romantic relationships as 'every single one fails until it doesnt'. I've been with shitty people and I've been a shitty person but finally I worked on myself and found someone who worked on themselves. It was 100% worth the time and effort for the connection we have and life we get to create together.

To end the rant, remember the internet is the internet and also that finding your person is fucking hard and involves a lot of luck

Wife_and_Mama · 2024-06-03T17:07:25+00:00

My stepmother took my sisters-in-law and stepsister to a craft show two days after I got the news I might never have children. I was so afraid I'd burst into tears at the first mention of kids, but no one said anything at all. Months later, she told me my stoic husband (who I've called a robot at least a hundred times in our marriage), called her in secret to ask that no one talk about babies.

My husband sat in the car during every infertility appointment I had in 2020, because he couldn't come in due to Covid-19. I went through surgery and an embryo transfer alone twice, but I at least knew he was there.

I almost died the night my girls were born. My husband slept by my side in the ICU visitors chair three nights. When I woke up screaming because they took my babies, he talked to the doctors and convinced them to bring my girls down with two armed security guards and a team of nurses so I could hold them. My girls will be three in two weeks. He just told me he orchestrated this.

I don't know why you broke up with your boyfriend. If you're this heartbroken, I'd wager the reasons were legitimate. I just want to tell you that I was once a heartbroken 23-year-old divorcee, who thought she'd never find love. I was wrong.

Jenneapolis · 2024-06-04T02:01:22+00:00

Absolutely, and that doesn’t mean you end up with that person / those people either. I think there’s a tendency to define true love as only existing if you stay with that person for the rest of your life and I just don’t believe that. You can have true love, you can have it multiple times, and it can also not work out long-term. So whenever you are feeling it, always embrace and enjoy.

SuperiorLake_ · 2024-06-03T16:13:06+00:00

Love is an action, not an emotion. Of course feelings of fondness, respect, a sense of security, and appreciation of the person is prevelant, but real love is the commitment and intention to stay and care for someone as lust waxes and wanes.

Edit- I firmly believe misunderstanding what love is is why so many relationships fail. Assuming love is only a feeling sets you up for failure because lust (often confused as love) isn’t constant. It’s about remembering your intention and staying committed to your partner when passion might not be as strong. Establishing a mutual friendship is necessary for this. Both partners have to actually want to work towards keeping the bond strong.

BudgetInteraction811 · 2024-06-03T17:31:43+00:00

Yes, of course it exists. The reason some people grow old and bitter about having a string of relationships where they were treated poorly is because they don’t know how to set boundaries or see red flags. If you have a traumatic upbringing it’s a lot easier to excuse red flags or assume it’s how love is supposed to be, just because the caregivers in your life mistreated you. But if you know what to avoid and cut someone off at the first sign of toxic behaviour, you’ll make room for someone else to come along and won’t waste so much time in a bad relationship that causes you to become a pessimist about love.

krispiest_kurl · 2024-06-03T18:11:06+00:00

My parents are still happily in love and married 30 years later

CountTheBees · 2024-06-04T03:07:32+00:00

"Connection" and "real love" are different concepts which you are conflating.

It doesn't need to be magical to be real love (two people can have great relationship with mutual understanding and support, but also acknowledging they are not the only possible partners for each other) and a connection does not imply a great relationship (trauma bonds, codependent or abusive relationships, or even great chemistry can all feel very intense but aren't healthy or aren't enough to build a relationship on).

Having been young and idealistic and no longer being young but still somewhat idealistic, I'd say that what young people think is "the end" or "the last" or "the only" is usually not correct. You mature a lot in your 20s and I assume for the rest of your life. Your preferences and standards do change and the man who's "perfect" for you now may not be perfect for you in 2, 5, or 10 years. If you two are together and grow together, it's more likely that he will be... But if you two grow apart or spend a lot of time apart it's less likely.

If you have just ended an LDR in which the communication/conflict resolution was poor or nonexistent, I think you made the right choice... Put yourself out there in the real world and meet someone locally. It's much easier to resolve relationship issues with a hug in person.

countrylemon · 2024-06-03T16:47:11+00:00

Absolutely. I actually think all the time about how much I wish the people I love, could experiance love the way I do with my husband.

He’s my best friend, truly my other half, gets all my jokes and makes jokes just for me to laugh, he’s charming and he’s obsessed with me as much as I am with him. We spend our sundays just us two together every week and we always go on tangents about how we live eachother more everyday and we can’t believe it, after 12 years? How can it even be possible to love someone even more everyday???

I love watching him exist in the world, and he feels the same about me, watching eachother go after our dreams, work our asses off,pursue hobbies, develop friendships and engage with our families.

He’s seen me in the darkest of depths, in ways I would have encourage him to run, but he stayed through everything. I can’t believe it still, but he always sees ME for me.

I love thinking about our futures, every detail, I love working with him through any problems that arise for us, because he’s the one I trust most in the world. I want our children to take after him because they’d be perfect.

We help eachother in our downfalls and push eachother into our successes.

If this isn’t what true love is, true real love, then it doesn’t exist, but from what all the stories and fairytales said, I’ve certainly found it. True, real love, for a lifetime.

and that love ever gets cut short, I’ll be able to die at least knowing I knew what true love felt like. I’d he dies, then I’m aiming for money next, because I’ll never love someone like I love him.

BrilliantLifter · 2024-06-03T18:34:46+00:00

It exists, you don’t see it often because people are more narcissist and neurotic than ever before.

The people who are genuinely happy aren’t in the limelight like the crazy people who are screeching on every platform about how it’s never their fault that every relationship they have ever had has imploded.

ArkNemesis00 · 2024-06-03T19:00:29+00:00

I believe that soul mates are forged and not found. I have mine.

I believe every relationship is "bad" a certain percentage of the time. It's all about finding a frequency and severity of "bad" that you can tolerate for the rest of your life, and then putting in the work to slowly improve from that.

WhatIsThisAccountFor · 2024-06-03T17:55:28+00:00

You should try again with your ex it sounds like.

Yes true love is real. This sub boils it down to a more formulaic way of viewing love, but at the core of every relationship there has to be love or else the relationship will not be a good one.

AutoModerator · 2024-06-03T15:49:32+00:00

Title: Does real love exist?

Author pinkflowerprincessx

Full text: Asking because I see and hear of so many bad relationships, to me a relationship is pointless if there isn't a real connection. So I'm just here to ask women does it actually exist?

^{This is the original text of the post and this is an automated service}

I am a bot, and this action was performed automatically. Please contact the moderators of this subreddit if you have any questions or concerns.

kenrnfjj · 2024-06-03T16:18:02+00:00

What do you mean like having one true soulmate

Jewelry_lover · 2024-06-03T22:40:12+00:00

What do you define as “true love”? Like romantic love?

adbtelegram · 2024-06-04T04:47:08+00:00

Yes, love is rare but it exists. I've loved the same woman for 14 years and I don't think that will ever change, even if we split up one day. During all these years we never separated, except once for 3 months because of an exchange I did, she cheated on me and even then I forgave her and we got back into the relationship. love really exists, but it is very expensive, the price may not be worth it

Neither-Tone7226 · 2024-06-04T10:26:06+00:00

I don’t know, I don’t think I’ve ever seen it. Most of my family members are divorced and those who are in long lasting relationships are miserable, usually due to the guy being an alcoholic, a cheater or just a plain jerk. I’ve never lived it either, we much as I’ve loved my partners it’s never been smooth and easy and it has often been destructive, abusive, painful and difficult.

I do know a few people who seem happy in love but they either don’t live together, don’t have children, and/or have a lot of money and go on constant getaways.

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husheveryone · 2024-06-06T12:13:15+00:00

Real romantic love exists, but it’s rare, sometimes unreciprocated, and often fleeting. You have to watch actions carefully because people don’t usually tell you when they’ve fallen out of love. But they’ll definitely show you.

Ever notice how great husbands talk about meeting their wives and it’s like something came over them where they immediately needed to have MORE of that woman? Athol Kay in MMSLP wrote about meeting his wife, Jennifer - “and it was like discovering cocaine. More Jennifer please. More. MORE!… I literally left everything behind in New Zealand to come be with her and that didn’t even happen until we had survived a 3-year-long distance relationship.”

Title	Does real love exist?
Author	pinkflowerprincessx
Upvotes	10
Comments	34
Date	June 3, 2024 3:49 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/1d77p6k/does_real_love_exist/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/does-real-love-exist.1520440 https://theredarchive.com/post/1520440

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