Hi ladies. I'd really appreciate some insight into why this man acts like this.

I (28f) met this man (30m) on a dating app - I had just started using the apps and he was the first person I went out with using them. We hit it off initially, barring an argument about politics, we talked for a month or so and he said he liked arguing with me because he liked a woman with character. When we finally met, I could see that he ticked a lot of boxes for me and I was very attracted. However in person, I was suuuper nervous around him, firstly because I liked him, and secondly because this was the first date I had ever been on (I come from a traditional background). He seemed very attentive and interested in me on the date, in fact he would stare constantly and would rarely look away. However after the date he said it's best we don't meet again because I was too nervous.

Several months later, he swipes right on me again on the dating app. I'm still hurt by his rejection, and I'm afraid of us arguing and falling apart, so I decide to wait several weeks, after which I swipe right and we match. I don't talk to him, wait for him to say something, however he unmatches quickly. I send him a message which he ignores.

Over a year later, he 'likes' me again on another dating app, and I swipe left, and he 'likes' me again two more times. I wait three months this time, before liking him back. When I like him back he ignores me again. As the time is about to run out I say that I feel like I'm being gaslit and that I'll never like him again. He quickly messages to say 'hello, I'm at a work event, how are you' and then I say that I'm about to delete the app and give him my number, before deleting. He doesn't message several days later.

I'm unsure why he keeps coming back, years later, despite not making many moves. Has this happened to anyone else?

On my part, I keep trying to find others but find him hard to forget about - he's the one that I've liked the most for the two years that I've been on these apps. Everyone else is just bland in comparison, I feel no attraction and no frustration/desire to argue either way.