[FR] Purple Piller Tries Tinder After 6 Years of Incel Marriage

Summary

Lifelong Beta in an Alpha's body finally grows some stones. Works out, feels better about himself, then discovers TRP and gets blown away. Manages to initiate a tenuous open marriage with the wife, goes on a tinder expedition and is shocked at the attention he gets.

Body

Backstory

Somehow I grew up fearing beautiful girls, was shy, and a clumsy tall kid. Perhaps it was because my older sister and her friends would make fun of me, or not, who knows... In my teen years I did OK, but lacked the confidence in landing greater than HB5 girlfriends. So in College I did a bit better, but latched onto one girl I eventually married 14 years ago (after being together steady for 5 years). We had kids, bought a house, and turned into a boring couple that didn't have the fun we used to have. The kids became the most important thing to the wife, and sex became the least important. Our last child, who is now 5, represents the last time I had sex. Yes, this is true.

Recent Events

After feeling sorry for myself for years, I hit bottom. I slowly realized I was in charge of my own life and had to improve things on my own. I started hitting the gym to help strengthen my feeble back which was neglected for years sitting at a desk. Getting in shape changed my self esteem for the better. I started thinking critically about my situation. I was in an "angry monk mode" and used the gym to vent my frustrations. After struggling with the idea of proposing an open marriage (we have completely fallen out of love for each other, she's basically a housemate who takes care of my kids) I finally did it. She had no recourse to the open marriage idea. Her only possible way of denying it would have been some twisted logic where she owns my sexuality and can lock it away forever or until she decides it can be used. Bullshit. Anyway, she saw this and said it was 'fine' to have an open marriage. I basically told her I wasn't asking anyway, rather, I was being courteous in letting her know my intentions.

Tinder Time

Tinder is fucking awesome. After getting use to the app, I happened to match with a hot, post wall single mother. All I really wanted to to was get into a 'dating' situation with someone to see how it would go, to see if I still could manage the social interaction. I tried my best at texting game by using TRP strategy of IDGAF, abundance mentality, and amused mastery. They seemed to work. In the same day that we initially texted each other, we had a date scheduled. I took charge and laid out a 'plan' which she complemented me on and agreed to. Much to my wife's chagrin, I told her I was 'going out' for the evening. She texted me after I left and asked if I was coming home that night or the next morning. lol.

On the way to the bar I indulged in simple thoughts about how I was going to maintain frame, be stoic, but not a bore, and to remember kino. Yes, kino! I tried to get there early because I wanted to be there when she arrived. I made it in time, sat down and had a beer. Then I get a text from her (we'll call her Sara). She said her car broke down and she would need me to pick her up or her relative would do it. I thought it was a joke at first, then decided hell, let's show some class and offer to go get her. I told her I'd go get her and the next thing I see is that her car all of a sudden is working again, barely. Hmmmm. Anyway, she said she'd arrive at the bar soon.

First Encounter

As I was sitting at the bar I chatted it up with a couple of dudes hanging out after work. We were commenting on a funny infomercial on some BS exercise equipment. Then Sara comes in and, wow, heads turned. She was tall, slim, and very hot. Those dudes I was talking to were on alert, but quickly folded when they saw she was there for me. I sent her a smile, and taking an idea from one of BetaMaleFeminist's posts on first impressions, I approached her and gave her a hug and lifted her off her feet. She LOVED it, the tingles were flowing. She followed me over to the bar where I had two stools waiting, and sat down. Immediately she started kino with ME when she began about the car trouble. She ordered her drink and continued talking and was clearly excited. I reciprocated much kino and our eyes locked often in that 'special way'.

After a long time of initial conversation that was going very well, we had to of course use the restrooms (note on indulgence, we only had 2 drinks each the whole night). When we got back, she had a smirk on her face and told me she has porn on her phone and she loves to watch it. What!!! That's not AWALT! I keep my cool fearing some kind of shit test and tell her that's nice in a disinterested way. She then proceeded to show me some of these pictures, some of which were her. At this point I was totally astounded. She was so forward about her sexuality and desires it completely floored me. I tried my best to maintain frame and be stoic, but inside my little boy blue was blushing and jumping with excitement. So she then tells me she likes it rough and to be choked. I nearly fell out of my seat. I agreed and amplified, but not in a condescending or sarcastic way. I wanted to show my full support of her kinks.

Sitting at the bar was incredible, I had my hands on her thigh and my fingers in her hair, she was grabbing my hands and stroking them, the kino never stopped. I don't remember consciously deciding to kiss her, and at that point IDGAF. It was well received and returned. Later, we walked to my car to take her home. We necked in the car for a while and then got on the road. The drive was thick with anticipation.

Logistics prevented the close - beta excuse?

This part was messed up. I have a family at my house, so that was not an option, and she was visiting her extended family, so the house she was staying at was not an option for closing. Frustrated, I dropped her off. I asked her if I could use the restroom in the house, which worked out great, because after that we made out for a long time and got some petting/grinding in. She would whither and moan at my hands going over her body as if she was on the brink. I was lavishly consuming this hottie but I could not see a way to close! There was nowhere that my beta self was ready to attempt it. Her family was asleep in the house and there were lights on and my car is very small, it was not a convenient situation.

Eventually we did say goodbye and I left, feeling like a king and a chump at the same time.

Epilogue

I got a bad case of one-itis in the following days and knew I could fuck everything up if I tried to contact her too much. Just sent her a text so she would have my number, but she didn't respond. So I sent her another one telling her I wanted some naughty pictures of her, still no response. That was it, radio silence after that and it's been just about a week now. Not sure if we'll ever get together again. TRP advice would be appreciated.

Since I drafted this, I was matched with someone else on Tinder who wanted to see a topless selfie. Dread game time! I shared the pic with the caption "as requested, topless selfie" and guess who liked it first? Sara, yep, she knew she was not the one requesting the pic, so she figured I'm just moving on. Beautiful, I see a plate starting to spin.

Lessons Learned

It would appear that applying TRP does have merit. I was skeptical but when I started practicing these ideas, I saw results. I'm no AMOG yet, but I see things coming together. My situation is very complicated with a wife and kids. Not sure how I'll manage this, and advice is welcome. Thanks for reading.