So about 1.5 year ago I started lurking here and on a bunch of other forums. A year before that my ex broke up with me and I was devastated. I came here to learn pick-up, but ended up in trying to become a better man.

I have read books; including The Game, Models, The Selfish Gene, The Book of Pook, The Lean Startup and I am currently reading The Gervais Principle and the Power of Now. (And I read quite some unrelated books for my profession). I read a lot of recommended stuff here, on seddit, sosuave etc.

I joined the gym and work out at least three to four times a week, I managed to get a free personal trainer by having a good conversation with a former body builder. He pushes me over my limits every time.

I dare to dress well; I am not ashamed of wearing accessories anymore. I go with the fashion and feel good in what I wear.

I started my own company 7 months ago and I am well into making one of the bigger 6 figures by the end of the year.
Edit: Please don't send me message anymore about this, I have no time to reply them all. I am considering making a new post of how I mix TRP and Business in the next couple of weeks. But I have to think about it, and see if I have something valuable to say about this.

I have more friends and more different friends, most of them are ambitious, travelers, highly educated and are not boring.

I never watch TV anymore and I don’t play games anymore. I visit my family, my lonely grandma and take them out for dinner instead.

I go out at least three times a week. I attend every party I am invited to. I approach on every occasion. I go to festivals and approach.

But still, I am never getting laid. Why?

Just kidding, I am getting laid. A lot. Am I happy? Fuck yes! Am I there yet? Fuck no! I am nowhere near where I want to be. There are about 30 books on my to read list, my bf and weight isn’t where I want it to be, my company is still pivoting and every directions seems like a better one. I want to approach more women. When I have the time, I want to go out for 30 days in a row. I want to get dancing lessons. I want to do a team sport.

I am getting narcissistic. It thrills me when I arrive at a party, and some girls start cheering and I hear other girls ask “Who is that?”. I think it’s OK though. I went from a boring beta that didn’t do shit with his life to what you are reading above in 1.5 years. I will grow over it. And although on most days I feel like I’m on top of the world, there are still days I get intimidated. There are still guys that intimidate me, not the old ones though, there are new ones.

What am I still carrying from ‘the old days’ that I need to work on?

I still care about what people think of me. I am still fucking nervous when approaching. I am still trying to convince people of my opinion. I still have a strange feeling that I don’t really deserve the money I am making, but I do, I am fucking good at my job.

Why am I writing this?

I ran into an old friend ‘Beta XL’ a while ago due to a family occasion. He came to me talking about girls two weeks ago. He wanted to have some advice; I gave him some. He was interested; I gave him some more. He liked it; I gave him some terms. He Googled them and landed on a seduction forum, maybe seddit, I don’t know. He liked it; We talked about it. I thought he was in. Then suddenly BOOM. He turned back all over beta XXL this time. He was against the shit he was reading, it wouldn’t work, it wasn’t him. The improvement isn’t going to help, maybe he would try for his insecurities, yet he is video-gaming all the fucking time. He doesn’t want to just fuck chicks like all the crazy PUA’s, he wants to love them.

I literally want to punch him in the face. Tell him the shit I am writing here above. I can’t though. His father is a good friend of my father and my family likes to gossip like a couple of old women. He’s showing a great example of the stigma that is still around this subject and I don’t want that in my family. And besides that, I find myself arrogant so imagine what his response would be. Everything went way faster than I expected, but I worked fucking hard to get here. When people know you’re reading about this stuff and following peoples advice (Advice from people that worked fucking hard themselves and I can't tell you how much I appreciate it.), they act like you're cheating. Like a body builder that uses steroids never has to train anymore and just gets big automatically or something.

So to my beta friend and people like him. When you're reading this. Just fucking do it. Start reading all the stuff, actually try to get somewhere. Don’t be afraid. Stop being so fucking biased and open yourself up for different views and perspectives. Try to be objective. Try new things because you've been like this all your life. When you say stuff like I want to love them ask yourself what that even means. And you know this works else you wouldn’t be coming to me for advise, you would never have come to me 2 years ago. So when I give you advise try to consider it, because that is what I did.