This is an update to this thread http://archive.li/p3rwY

The ride, although I realize now, merely at the very beginning, has been somewhat of a roller coaster of emotions. One the one hand, it has been humbling. More so, it feels like a purge of old ideas and conceptions, like I've been totally reset to a state where I am now presented with a bunch of bits and pieces of what I was, and now I have to put it all back together into a person. I still am kind of at odds as to what's my direction exactly, but it's fine. Because on the other hand, this feeling is exhilarating. I don't want to be poetic and cliche but I do honestly feel happy for the first time in years. It's like I was born again. I am more at ease with reality and myself, I take more pleasure out of the little things than I ever did. I feel alive and confident.

Last Sunday I went home and told her I want to break up. She wouldn't have it, cried her eyes off, pleaded, promised the whole nine yards. But I was committed to dumping her. Still didn't have the power to physically grab her by the shoulders and throw her out, so I kept saying I want to break up, she kept asking me to reconsider until we went to sleep. No sex was involved but she tried to hug me and cried a lot. Next morning I go to work, come home to the same exact scenario. Still wanted to dump her. She still wouldn't leave, I still couldn't actually throw her to the curb.

Next morning while she's at work, I pack some shit, take the dog to crash at my brother's for a couple of nights. So I'm off to work for the day and I text her she has 2 days to take all her shit out and leave. Then I went ahead and blocked her everywhere.

Two days, hundreds of messages of her asking for forgiveness and another chance later, she texts me she took everything and left.

So I take the dog and my shit and I go home.

While I was staying at my brother's I went back on Tinder and started making new friends on Facebook. I had been faithful to my ex for the entire time and I wanted to fuck. Started a few convos but wasn't prepared to to put in any considerable effort so I was only after easy pickings. Eventually I found on Facebook, a girl I had seen in a cafe a couple days earlier. I went for a quick beer and took a couple shots of her (i'm a photographer). So I send her a pic, start a convo, ask her over for a beer and she agrees.

She's this tiny 5 foot tall, 21 year old, 82 pound chick, kind of pretty with very nice boobs and a tiny little ass. I fuck her brains out, sleep it over and she's out. I felt nothing. The orgasm was ok, but I almost felt like I'd have been better off spending those few hours with myself. But hey, new pussy.

I signed a pre-contract to selling my studio apartment. I bought it in 2015 and am selling it now for a $5000 profit. I will be getting myself (and the doggo, too :) a bigger, nicer place.

I have a gym membership, started lifting about two weeks ago. At work I got another monthly bonus thing, so I guess I'm doing something good there as well.

I haven't spoken to or heard anything from the ex, nor do I have any such desire. I am finally confident I never want her or anything like this again, I realize it's been ENTIRELY my fault for allowing it to happen in the first place and surrendering any little power I had. I started listening to the Rational Male audiobook and my mind is blown.

Spring has come. I feel young. I feel powerful.","selftext_html":"

This is an update to this thread http://archive.li/p3rwY

The ride, although I realize now, merely at the very beginning, has been somewhat of a roller coaster of emotions. One the one hand, it has been humbling. More so, it feels like a purge of old ideas and conceptions, like I've been totally reset to a state where I am now presented with a bunch of bits and pieces of what I was, and now I have to put it all back together into a person. I still am kind of at odds as to what's my direction exactly, but it's fine. Because on the other hand, this feeling is exhilarating. I don't want to be poetic and cliche but I do honestly feel happy for the first time in years. It's like I was born again. I am more at ease with reality and myself, I take more pleasure out of the little things than I ever did. I feel alive and confident.

Last Sunday I went home and told her I want to break up. She wouldn't have it, cried her eyes off, pleaded, promised the whole nine yards. But I was committed to dumping her. Still didn't have the power to physically grab her by the shoulders and throw her out, so I kept saying I want to break up, she kept asking me to reconsider until we went to sleep. No sex was involved but she tried to hug me and cried a lot. Next morning I go to work, come home to the same exact scenario. Still wanted to dump her. She still wouldn't leave, I still couldn't actually throw her to the curb.

Next morning while she's at work, I pack some shit, take the dog to crash at my brother's f