It's romanticized and fantasized through books, movies, poetry, and folk tales; There is this epic notion of a "one true love" in life. Some refer to this as someone's "soulmate." Others might refer to it as "the love of your life." I am here to tell you today that this is a load of bullshit which was romanticized to appeal to women.

Firstly, men do not have an "One True Love". To begin with, the entire concept that you're destined to love a single person and to let this desire consume you is a female perspective. The underling principle is simple, biological even. It is this:

Women have to choose, men don't.

Women can only be in love with one man at a time. In particular this man is most often the one whom she chooses as the suitable sire of her children. This is biologically limited because a woman can only carry one man's child. Women only feel strongly (romantically) about one man at a time. Women have to choose, which man will be it? Further, you do not see history littered with tales of female lorded harems.

Men are not the same as women in regards to this. A man can be equally in love with many women at once. He is not biologically limited to having a child with only one. A man does not have to choose which woman will be the mother of his single child, because he can impregnate many with ease.

When a woman has multiple suitors, in her head she is comparing them and trying to choose the best possible one out of the bunch. She has to choose as it is impossible for her to mother all of their children at once.

When a man has multiple women, he doesn't need to choose a single one. Why would he, biologically? The idea that a man needs to commit himself to a single woman is an artificial limitation placed on him by society. This isn't necessarily a bad limitation, as it is what made our current civilization (which is also artificial, or unnatural) possible. [For more info on that read up on the start of monogamy (1 reference).] But, it's key to remember that this limitation goes against everything a man is built to do regarding his natural reproductive cycle. Even marriage didn't originally mean certain monogamy.

I'm not sure how this quite works out for gay men, so this post doesn't pertain to them.

Even women don't have a soulmate

If you've read the sidebar material you know by now, women are hypergamous by nature. Therefore whatever "soulmate" a woman thinks she has found, is only her current "soulmate." The only time a woman reminisces about a past "love of her life" is when she loses that particular man before she was ready to move to a new one. This can be a result of the man dying, the man ending the relationship, or after a failed attempt to swing to a higher branch.

It's a fantasy

It sounds wonderful, to live an entire life with someone you care about and are attracted to enough to have children with. It sounds great to be care-free and know that your love is eternal and unconditional. It would be amazing to just get lost in someone else and for that feeling to last forever without any work being required to maintain it. It would be blissful for "true love" to be a physical force in the universe that lives beyond our brief life spans.

That's why it's written in books. That's why it's portrayed in movies. People would love for there to be a genie that granted 3 wishes, or maybe a shooting star that they could wish upon to make them a real son. Magic is exciting and fun, but it isn't real. And when it comes to sexual strategy it is very important to know what is real and what isn't.

A soulmate is just an emotional rationalization your mind feeds you, and it is one that women would have you believe in so that they can have leverage over you. But it is also a useful "magic trick" that can help you lure women into bed, or sell a lot of books and movie tickets.

Disclaimer: None of this is very original nor do I take any credit. This is a culmination of different ideals frequently talked about here, I just put them together in this post.