Single 45 year old is perplexed that dating is so difficult but she believes in true love

Typo-MAGAshiv · 2022-03-23T19:59:44+00:00

Speaking as someone who married a woman former cop (medically retired due to injury), I have to say that much of what I'm seeing here in the comments is accurate. I'll confirm some items, augment a few, and add some more.

A) you think regular women twist words? That regular women will take anything you say and rephrase it in such a way that portrays you in the most negative way possible? Cops (attorneys too) take it to a whole 'nother level.

B) you think regular women will bring up something stupid and inconsequential (or so you thought) from years ago to use against you? Women cops, again, are even worse.

C) one of my biggest fears during our rough patch ~~a few~~ correction, several years ago (time flies!) was that she'd use her knowledge of the system to falsely accuse me of domestic violence and ruin my life. It has happened to other men who have married woman cops, and back when I was new to reddit a man who had gone through the divorce wringer via his cop ex-wife exchanged some notes with me about this. She did it to him. He had an old post on /r/TheRedPill detailing his ordeal, and if I can dig it up, I'll edit this to add it in.

Luckily for me, my wife has more moral character than that, but I advise other men not to chance it.

If being married is the Red Pill on hard mode, marrying a divorced former cop is the Red Pill on nightmare mode, and someone spilled beer all over your controller.

We've been back on track for quite a few years now, but as much as I recommend that men don't get married, I recommend avoiding women in law enforcement even more.

Traksimuss · 2022-03-23T17:43:48+00:00

Law Enforcement? That means she fucked all cops in the district, knows all the laws and when she whistles all cops will come and abuse you and you will be powerless to stop it.

loneliness-inc · 2022-03-23T17:44:19+00:00

I'm perplexed as to why dating after 40 is so difficult.

🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔🤔

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹😹

hornetsfalcons12 · 2022-03-23T17:49:57+00:00

1) “conservative” with her pronouns listed. Oooooookay. 2) what value do you provide a man that you’re looking to date? We already know he can’t get kids (at least she says that she doesn’t want them, there’s still 45 year old women out there who do). No idea if she does have kids already. 3) it’s like they didn’t believe anyone older than them and just had too much fun spending her and whatever random dude that she was with at the time’s money on “experiences” versus a kid’s schooling or food. It must come as a shock that commitment minded men have either gotten married, or moved on to the ones 10+ years younger than her. The party is over for single women in their 40’s, because no one is interested in being with them simply due to existing and not being fat.

NBA_MSG · 2022-03-23T18:53:53+00:00

Hilarious that there's an entire subreddit about how hard dating is a decade younger than her

loneliness-inc · 2022-03-23T17:43:07+00:00

I'm a hopeless ~~romantic~~

FTFY

Bob_and_Virginia · 2022-03-23T17:52:29+00:00

[permanently deleted]

APathWellTraveled · 2022-03-23T18:23:39+00:00

"I refuse to settle and accept my reality"

Gundamsafety · 2022-03-23T18:54:39+00:00

I doubt she is a COP, more likely just a dispatcher that has already been past around the barracks. Now she want s the "nice guy" who will let her continue to play victim and give her a shoulder to cry on.

polishknightusa · 2022-03-23T19:02:25+00:00

Nobody else caught it, so here's what I think is the source of her befuddlement:

"True Love" in woman-speak is the whole romance package: Guy gives her the "tingles", says "the right things", does his clown dance, pays for dates, and gives commitment.

If she wants unconditional true love, she should get a dog (or even a cat).

But a dog or cat's love isn't completely gratis. One has to actually feed and tend to them.

One would think someone who works in law enforcement would be a bit more reasonable about what to expect from men, perhaps someone who has no warrants or unpaid parking tickets.

Joaquino7997 · 2022-03-23T17:52:51+00:00

She may be a "hopeless romantic," but IMHO she's just "hopeless."

Bob_and_Virginia · 2022-03-23T18:10:34+00:00

"True love"? Someone tell this delusional fool that all relationshits are TRANSACTIONAL.

Oh wait. That sounds a lot like...like...prostitution! GASP! And being in law enforcement, she's not gonna like hearing that. Might even cuff you for it.

sleepyweaselisawake · 2022-03-23T21:57:29+00:00

Dating is hard when you're invisible. Welcome to being an average guy.

Old_snowboarder · 2022-03-23T18:16:19+00:00

'I refuse to believe' - and therein lies the problem. She'd prefer fairy tales to reality.

Overkillengine · 2022-03-23T18:18:06+00:00

Crazy thought, it's because she offers nothing that the kind of man she wants would require for considering commitment.

She wants a fully vested retirement plan after spending 25 years making absolutely no payments into one.

Buchwild · 2022-03-23T18:18:41+00:00

She'd make a great catch for a 70 year old I'm sure.

disayle32 · 2022-03-23T19:45:19+00:00

You had your chance 20 years ago, sweaty.

jazzy3113 · 2022-03-23T18:39:39+00:00

Why are faces always blocked out? Is it against the rules?

Unhingedmarine · 2022-03-23T17:59:13+00:00

She's a Christian conservative cop? There's your problem!

sleepyweaselisawake · 2022-03-24T05:55:50+00:00

You want to male dating over 40 easier? Simple, just accept that you're over 40 and tailor your expectations accordingly.

dzikun · 2022-03-23T18:50:01+00:00

Single unmarried 45 yo conservative Christian...

downzeitor · 2022-03-23T19:29:29+00:00

a ~perplexed~ 40+ yo wondering why "it is so difficult" to find love reminds me why (oh heavens why) people don't buy expired goods at the local store...

2022-03-24T08:12:34+00:00

Hopeless romantic = CC rider

World_Renowned_Guy · 2022-03-23T21:44:03+00:00

Meow meow meow meow

Go out and buy a cat that’s what you have left

droden · 2022-03-23T22:33:50+00:00

They are bad at math. The vast majority of people who never left or are back on the dating market at 40+ are not ltr material. Cc riders, crazy and divorce rapee/raper are not something anyone wants more of. Add on her 115 other requirements to her where clause and the result set is empty. Like her eggs.

skeletonshorror · 2022-03-24T01:47:52+00:00

That’s like saying “I’m surprised my 2009 Toyota Celica with 276,525 miles, bald tires and a blown head gasket isn’t worth more than I paid for it” 😂

redsenior · 2022-03-24T01:50:18+00:00

She/Her swipe left. Don’t want this kind of shit in my life.

Roman_69 · 2022-03-24T08:38:16+00:00

Oh look, another washed up party girl who found Christ and became conservative in her 40s, I can’t stop laughing

2022-03-24T01:43:30+00:00

Yikes. Who wants to date a 45 yo cop?

alexaxl · 2022-03-24T05:53:51+00:00

Disney sold it well.

NoFaithInThisSub · 2022-03-24T13:32:49+00:00

she believes in true love....

and then I saw her face!!! now I'm a disbeliever....

not a trace.... of doubt in ma ma-yind!!!

and she should look, her self in that mirror!!!

and without a doubt, become a crazy cat spinster!!!

houseoftolstoy · 2022-03-25T01:38:05+00:00

So many women describe themselves as "hopeless romatics." It is becoming endemic just like "my kids are my world."

Whether or not they are just parroting something they thought sounded good or somehow have come to such a conclusion, I always have to wonder how they got to the point they are at. I often think that it comes down to having way too narrow and unrealistic standards in what they think a relationship should be when they reach their epiphany phase while spending their 20s "having their fun." This leaves them unprepared for finding a good man as their physical standards are of the men that they had casual sex with while increasing the demands of commitment at the same time. An overall disaster in so many cases.

NickTesla2018 · 2022-03-24T03:25:10+00:00

With that line of work, she's usually a ball buster. Break out the strap on. : (

Seagram7 · 2022-03-25T07:15:53+00:00

Here is a topic I have seen firsthand and wanted to comment on for a while: women in traditional male professions where the men vastly outnumber the women. I have been in both the military in the sand box and my civilian job.

In the sand box, the phenomenon of the "Desert Queen." Out there, the men vastly outnumbered the few women deployed. I was on an all male combat outpost where we didnt see a woman for months. when we rotated to a FOB and saw women, we couldnt stop staring. Women that were a 4 or 5 on the looks scale became 8 and 9. The women out there had constant male attention. Even if we didnt speak to any of them, we couldnt stop looking. Hence the term "Desert Queen."

Fast forward to my civilian job. I went to an academy where the male to female ratio was 9 to 1. My academy class of 48 had a total of 5 women and 2 failed out due to firearms or the run. The women were constantly being flirted with, helped with their classwork, talked to, given support that no male ever got. For us it was sink or swim.

From what I have seen in both those environments, all that constant high level male attention and validation literally warped their brains. Add to this is the men are usually top tier, fit, young, aggressive, confident, the kind those professions attract, you get women that are giddy with this dream come true environment. This is hypergamy unleashed in the most tribal way I have ever seen. Really try to imagine being surrounded by fit, good looking guys constantly hitting on them.

Another issue I noticed in both environments is that the loneliness, the home sickness, the isolation experience along with the stress women cant handle the same way as men. I term it as they "cant do the time" in those situations. Men find support in peer bonding where as women---and you guessed right----all find a man for comfort. All of them, even the married women. They find a "battle buddy" in the sand box or an "academy fling" for support. The supposed good girls usually just stay with the one guy throughout while some of them go through almost every guy on the FOB or their academy class. Of course all the flings ends when we all get on a plane and go home. The women go home thinking that their reputations are safe and their gone wild time away from home is the past is the past.

What does this meandering of text all mean? Stay away from women working in any over-represented male profession. Police, fire, military. The overabundance of male attention has warped their brains, and they have had more opportunities to say yes to sex and have been banged more times than a drum.

Admirable_Bee_8714 · 2022-03-29T19:26:00+00:00

It is amazing to me that women think that their SMV is static and if one had high SMV at 20 then the SMV stays the same at 40 or 50 or 60.

2022-03-24T15:07:36+00:00

She will have to waiiiiiit so much ...till her death

Svartanatten · 2022-03-27T07:40:24+00:00

Oh a Xmas cake in late March. How tempting.

2022-04-06T15:46:33+00:00

STAY AWAY!

DrDog09 · 2022-03-26T21:50:11+00:00

Any woman who rode the same rough ride with her man till the end deserves it all. Any woman who waits at the finish line for the retirement package deserves scorn. Way too many play that game these days including the target above.

Title	Single 45 year old is perplexed that dating is so difficult but she believes in true love
Author	NBA_MSG
Upvotes	278
Comments	172
Date	March 23, 2022 5:41 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen/comments/tl3lj3/single_45_year_old_is_perplexed_that_dating_is_so/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen/single-45-year-old-is-perplexed-that-dating-is-so.1107904 https://theredarchive.com/post/1107904

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