Being a gentlemen on dates?

secret_barber · 2015-02-28T16:57:49+00:00

why this worked?

What do you mean, it worked? ...did you fuck her? ...did you makeout? ...did you already set a 2nd date?

tepper2 · 2015-02-28T16:53:14+00:00

Who paid for dinner?

letmeseeyourrealface · 2015-02-28T16:21:24+00:00

Just because she had a "wow" face doesn't mean she won't see you as a BP/beta. The girl loves to be treated like a lady/princess because it feeds her ego that she is "amazing". At least this is how I see it.

Doesn't mean you need to treat her crappy. But the more stuff you do for her (without her putting any effort in) the more you're probably going to get fucked over and treated like shit.

On the other hand, if you take charge and you treat her well I think she'll probably still want your cock. But, you have to be careful, don't do it too much.

thatsminty · 2015-02-28T19:43:11+00:00

She saw that you were refined enough to know to do that. It increased your perceived value and she was impressed which was evident in her behavior after.

Just remember, that stuff is nice, but beyond what you did there it's not going to win you any favor these days. Chivalry may not be dead, but too much will kill your chances.

TalkingMonkeys · 2015-02-28T16:55:38+00:00

This is not against red pill behavior. Red pill behavior involves a flawless performance. You may have just nailed the performance.

A girl wont be impressed if you scramble to run around the car and open the door. She will be disgusted if you fumble with the chair or force her to wait while you proceed to embellish your impression of a gentlemen.

Be aware of the situation. Understand nonverbal queues. Have good timing. Be effortless. Be natural. You know, just be confident.

Johnny10toes · 2015-02-28T16:49:52+00:00

I don't think it matters much. I'm from the south and we kind of just do the door thing. For girls, for guys, for little old ladies and even kids.

I wouldn't treat it like it's some kind of awesome thing because it's just a thing.

dopefinder · 2015-02-28T17:46:02+00:00

Depends on the girl. You can (should imo) always show common courtesy.

favours_of_the_moon · 2015-02-28T17:46:43+00:00

Maybe she's old school, but 9 times out of 10 a modern day woman will immediately experience inflation of her Female Ego Quantum Singularity and thus become physiologically unable to respect you in that situation.

beer77 · 2015-02-28T16:16:09+00:00

How old are you and how old is she?

midnightbean · 2015-02-28T21:20:49+00:00

Its all in why you're doing it, and or how she perceives it. If you're in an intelligent college town with intelligent classy girls, not doing those things is probably gonna turn them off. There is no shortage of selfish dudes out there who even have their 'shit' together.

But as to the why's, if it's because that is what you do because you're a man with self respect who conducts himself in that manner because that is how you wish to be, than it's great. Same as being kind.

Don't worry about fucking on the first date or any of that garbage some are saying here. An alpha is selective, has all the time in the world. Maybe an alpha doesn't want a fuck for a while because his dick is sore from fucking. Betabucks to fuck because it's what you think she wants and what you gotta do to keep her interested.

dandeezy · 2015-02-28T22:55:10+00:00

your experiment is very tiny. Contrary to popular believe, rp doesn't mean be an asshole. Although you were an asshole. Here's why: nice guys are selfish assholes.

You did this solely to impress her. You opened car doors and treated her like a princess to prove to her you're a nice guy and she should like you.

That's selfish. She would enjoy such courtesy if it didn't come from such a selfish origin. If she thought you would do this. She was wowed only to play her part. She's programmed to appreciate (reinforce) such gentlemen behaviour, just like people say thank you when someone holds the door as a quick thoughtless response. Continue to shower her with such behaviour and watch her disinterest in you grow and that fake/common appreciate disappear.

Now I hate some things about rp (lying to women specifically) so I'm not the type of butthurt crying ex-beta that's somewhat common here, however I do believe that you should stay true to yourself and be honest. If you're not planning on opening car doors for get the rest of her lives, don't do it one night or one month. Treat her how you would treat her 50 years from now. Don't be dishonest to her and to yourself.

If she was fat ugly and you had no attraction, tell me: would you have done the same?

Don't just play your role, think! ;-)

Cheers and good luck on the second date.

Monk6 · 2015-03-01T02:17:30+00:00

I think it worked because those are just signs of good manners, you didn't really go to far out of your way to be nice. But if you start canceling your plans for her, showering her with gifts, taking her shit, setting her priorities higher than yours, then it goes downhill.

Merwebb · 2015-03-01T04:39:55+00:00

Maybe you are showing her a behaviour that maybe no one else has. Ill advice to thread lightly, she could have seen you as beta and wants a beta anyways. Play it cool, break rapport, tease and be a gentleman.

_valtiel_ · 2015-02-28T18:05:41+00:00

That's just you bring a man, nothing to do with being a redpill.

Title	Being a gentlemen on dates?
Author	giffengoods
Upvotes	15
Comments	26
Date	February 28, 2015 4:13 PM UTC (11 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/2xgx7w/being_a_gentlemen_on_dates/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/being-a-gentlemen-on-dates.146585 https://theredarchive.com/post/146585

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