GF studying with known player

OmLaLa · 2015-12-17T13:35:20+00:00

I know a dude that pulls chicks left and right and generally does not gaf. He's made out with half the girls I know and gets the lion's share.

GF studying with known ~~player~~ Chad

He hit on my girlfriend one day while drunk, albeit when he didn't know we were together.

Today they run into each other and my girlfriend suggests they study together.

Sooo a Chad hits on her, she knows she has a bf, and how does she reciprocate? By "studying" alone with him.

And if they're just studying now, they won't be for long. Trust me, I went to college.

I tell her my concerns, and then she goes on to try to tell me "no, you're thinking of somebody else. He didn't try to hit on me." I specifically witnessed this shit occur.

This is one of the issues with LTRs. You're emotionally invested yet there's nothing that can prevent this girl from the inevitable branch swing.

This isn't sitting in my stomach well.

You're gut knows whats really going on, your ego's just trying to protect you from the harsh truth.

What do I do about this?

You prepare yourself to leave her. At this point there's nothing you can do. That, or accept the cuckold role.

BrunoOh · 2015-12-17T15:20:54+00:00

I hope you dumped her yesterday.

MyLittleAtomBomb · 2015-12-17T17:49:19+00:00

Sheep studying with known wolf

hey asktrp, I have a bit of a problem. My prized sheep is wanting to hang out with the wolf that ate half my neighbors' herds. I once saw the wolf get drunk and attempt to nibble on her leg a bit, but i guess he didn't know it was my sheep. Anyways, i asked my sheep why she'd want to hang out with a known wolf, and all she said was "baaaaaaah". What should I dooooo?

dandar4600 · 2015-12-17T14:07:32+00:00

He hit on my girlfriend one day while drunk, albeit when he didn't know we were together... Today they run into each other and my girlfriend suggests they study together.

Your turn of exclusivity with her just came to an end. Plate or next.

PoopInMyBottom · 2015-12-17T14:15:08+00:00

Okay, look. you can't control her behaviour. You'll never be able to control her behaviour, she will always be able to make the decision to sleep with him no matter what "boundaries" you set. There's nothing you can "do."

The problem here isn't that she wants to sleep with this guy, is that she values that over the relationship. Girls will always want to sleep with other guys, that's a given. The problem here is that she is willing to indulge it. If she's hiding the fact he's interested in her, she is at least trying to hide her tracks.

Focus on yourself. If she cheats on you, she cheats on you. Even if you prevent it you're still with somebody who is willing to risk a relationship over a fling. Be ready to move on. It could be innocent, but I doubt it. If it's not, you're going to break up sooner or later regardless of whether you prevent it successfully.

FrameWalker · 2015-12-17T15:15:24+00:00

This guy's doi g you a favor. See if you mesh and you've got a new wingman. Much more valuable than a single woman.

MattyAnon · 2015-12-17T07:28:07+00:00

"no, you're thinking of somebody else. He didn't try to hit on me." I specifically witnessed this shit occur.

Be careful, she's getting ready for a branch swing.

Get your game in order, flirt with other girls, keep an eye on this one, seriously consider demoting to FWB.

teddx · 2015-12-17T15:23:07+00:00

She is going to sleep with him and possibly even dump OP. When she realizes she got used and the player doesn't want a ltr, she'll come running back to OP telling him it was a mistake, that he's the one for her.

babydocnorman · 2015-12-17T15:08:58+00:00

my girlfriend suggests they study together.

Translation: your girlfriend wants him to spend one on one time with her at her place or his. I think you know what's up.

Craafty16 · 2015-12-17T22:04:49+00:00

Always trust your gut

Stories_of_Red · 2015-12-17T15:51:24+00:00

She is a plate, not a GF, until she stops trying to gaslight you about her interest in other men.

When she goes to study with him, have a date scheduled with another woman. Don't hide it. When she goes ballistic about you dating someone else, you don't bat an eye: "If you are going to date other people, so am I. And no, don't for one second pretend this is anything other than a date." Be entirely smiling and DGAF. No angry tears or simpering crap. You are dropping some nuclear DGAF here, and it has to be upbeat to really make the legend travel well. When other people ask you about it, you never show upset or anger, you tell it like a funny story, because that is what it is: someone (her) doing something incredibly stupid, and expecting you would go along with it. "Nope," is your response.

Then be utterly heartless about refusing to cancel your date and otherwise driving this to a break-up. It is the only way to wake her up to her own "it just happened!" pre-planning of her infidelity. If she turns into a sobbing, remorseful mess, you might have a chance. Anything less than that? Walk, forever.

clint_bronson · 2015-12-17T10:27:50+00:00

your girlfriend is going to get her brains fucked the shit outta of her by McPlayer, and it was all her idea.

If you don't dump her immediately you deserve what's coming

OwhShit · 2015-12-17T15:05:37+00:00

Chances she and him are going to study: 1% Chances she and him are going to "study": 99%

It's not about if, it's about when. Drop her.

3rt41 · 2015-12-17T15:43:31+00:00

Once i was Chad, i wasn't even interested.

This hot and engaged friend of mine invited me to study for a final at her place.

The second time around we were study-drunk after a lot of hours, what i remember is that we were sitting next to each other and i got my hand STRAIGHT ON HER PUSSY.

We had sex multiple times and she eventually dropped off the guy, but i wasn't interested that much so i went away.

p.s. I didn't knew she was engaged until shit went down.

[deleted] · 2015-12-17T13:53:09+00:00

[permanently deleted]

[deleted] · 2015-12-17T17:30:41+00:00

I tell her my concerns

No. Just no. When you raise concerns about Chad, you're subconsciously raising his SMV in her head. (Been there, done that, have plenty of tee shirts that no longer fit). You're demonstrating that he's a better catch than you and it wouldn't be a surprise to you if she left you for him.

Respectively, you're lowering your SMV as well in her eyes by putting yourself in a position of desperation.

The best thing is to say nothing at all, after all 99% of relationships are temporary anyway. Go hangout with friends or go study with an attractive female friend if you need to get your mind off of things to prevent your anxiety from getting out of control.

One of my plates is "friends" with some Havard Business School student who comes from great wealth (He will be inheriting a business that is known globally as CEO). Obviously, my instinctual defenses had risen because this guy clearly has more worth in the world than me and he's probably not bad looking (successful men usually = handsome).

I responded by saying "Wow, that's really cool you were able to make that networking connection. He sounds like heh as a bright future ahead of him." I said it instinctually because I'm pretty unattached (she's just a plate + abundance mentality); but by saying this I also lowered his status in her head to just "business networking" while simultaneously demonstrating that I don't feel threatened at all by a millionaire and elevating myself to that state of mind in her eyes.

Abundance abundance abundance. You're in college man, there's hot women everywhere. This is great time to practice holding a congruent frame of mind with things like this. Not only will it help you keep your women loyal to you, but it will help you in future endeavors with non sex related things (job prospects, business negotiation, etc..)

Women don't want an equal, they want a rock. A man that cant be moved and doesn't show face when met with fear. He either conquers or is defeated with his dignity intact a la Leonidas and his men at the battle of Thermopylae.

Demote her to FWB / plate status. When I gave my example with the plate i mentioned before, I knew there was no way I could LTR this girl. She drinks a lot, has loads of guy friends (most of them losers she wouldn't bang anyway, but it's still an issue), and has an ex boyfriend in the picture who's probably still getting over his one-iris; on top of that all, plenty of slutty stories she's shared with me and I overheard from her friends.

There is literally no point to taking girls like this seriously, just have fun with them and have sex. Don't get emotionally invested because if she can't control her tingles for Chad and be a good girlfriend, you'll be bought out.

fit_to_fight · 2015-12-17T17:43:24+00:00

She's told you to your face she values this 'study time ' more than your relationship. Does she need to cut off your balls to make the point? Walk away. Don't cause a scene, no drawn out argument, no dread game..just walk. When she asks tell her she did something you don't approve of. Maintain your boundaries and replace her.

bittr_n_swt · 2015-12-17T13:20:11+00:00

Yep she's definitely gonna fuck him because it "just happened." worse thing is that she suggested studying with him

Okeseko · 2015-12-17T12:41:15+00:00

This is one of many reasons I avoid LTR's like a plague.

If you're getting constantly worried if she cheats or not you shouldn't be in a LTR. I remember being fucking worried when my ex was on night out. It sucks! Don't do this to yourself!

Fast forward 1 year I plated a girl with boyfriend and I'm near plating another one who has boyfriend. To get you a idea, stuff that I did with this plate: I fucked her in the bathroom of a nightclub; I cummed in her drink, she then drank it while texting "Sweet dreams, I love you to" to her boyfriend. She's with her boyfriend for 6 years and she never drank his cum.

ViperG · 2015-12-17T18:06:16+00:00

Honestly how often does a GIRL ask to study with a guy. It's the other way around (Guys 95% do the asking). She is massively interested in him. Your relationship is over.

cuntdestroyer8000 · 2015-12-17T20:21:37+00:00

We all know what's going to happen, but please update for confirmation.

JimFury · 2015-12-17T06:49:12+00:00

There's nothing you can do about it. If you straight up tell her no she'll think you're a jealous pussy and it'll just drive her away.

prodigy2throw · 2015-12-17T15:44:25+00:00

Just your turn my man. She was never yours.

The faster you internalize this the better.

KingAsael · 2015-12-17T06:56:37+00:00

Man up and get back to the basics. Your inner game weak af. Any display of "mate guarding" is the ultimate female turn off.

IVIaskerade · 2015-12-17T12:31:23+00:00

albeit when he didn't know we were together.

It wouldn't have mattered if he had known.

they run into each other and my girlfriend suggests they study together.

She's the one who suggested it? Wowee, that's thirsty.

This isn't sitting in my stomach well. What do I do about this?

Tell her that you aren't comfortable with her studying biology with him, and that you're looking out for her (after all, accidents happen, and you wouldn't want her to accidentally fall on some strange dick).

redwormcharlie · 2015-12-17T16:05:47+00:00

You know she's not that dumb.

NEXT!

SkorchZang · 2015-12-17T18:52:56+00:00

I would get all wistful-like and fake being philosophical about it, for her sake:

"Sweetheart, listen. I know you think it's no big deal and you're a big girl, you can handle yourself. I get it. But lookit, it's real simple from my perspective, if my girlfriend wants to spend her time 1 on 1 with a guy like that, good for her, but she's not gonna be my girlfriend for much longer... I trust you to make this decision easy for us, babe. Which is it going to be?"

This is mostly prime grade bullshit of course, which makes for excellent hamster food. Meanwhile there's a kernel of truth hidden in it, the unimpeachable ultimatum to either fall in line and act the faithful girlfriend part, or get the fuck out.

She might also get shady on you and say "yeah yeah", then do it anyway on the sly. Watch this bitch.

moveon4ever · 2015-12-17T20:23:43+00:00

I think biggest problem with guys for leaving GF in situations like this is that they don't want to look like losers, breaking up with her just and let alpha get on her..

buddboy · 2015-12-17T21:24:28+00:00

sounds like she's lying to you so she can get alone with him

Dsdcimyc · 2015-12-17T16:47:45+00:00

Dump her now

Okeseko · 2015-12-17T12:24:03+00:00

It's almost certain that he'll try to hit on her and if he's such a player I assume he is attractive and knows how to seduce a women.

I wouldn't say she would branch swing...but she could get banged and lie about it. I saw that shit happened a lot - women can't handle attraction.

My advice: don't make a fuss around it, but by all means find out the truth. Get a keylogger and log in her facebook account, whatever.

Title	GF studying with known player
Author	r9kisnothelpingme
Upvotes	19
Comments	45
Date	December 17, 2015 6:37 AM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askTRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/asktrp/comments/3x6n86/gf_studying_with_known_player/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askTRP/gf-studying-with-known-player.157988 https://theredarchive.com/post/157988

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