Being asian...A disadvantage?

ThrowawayPUA · 2012-12-05T18:39:11+00:00

Being a whining AFC is a disadvantage. Being Asian is not.

Vatho · 2012-12-05T17:54:34+00:00

[permanently deleted]

ItsTheFark · 2012-12-05T18:03:19+00:00

I've read somewhere that leather jackets tear apart the male Asian stereotype.

Nyssa_Hotaru · 2012-12-05T22:10:11+00:00

Caucasian woman here...I love Asian men. They seem to rarely hook up with me, though :( , but I did date a Korean guy and a Japanese guy at points in my life. I also think there is an inter-racial dating stereotype, because a lot of people still assume Asian men would only go with Asian women, so therefore many women tend to think "off limits". Comparing races of males is like comparing apples to oranges, everyone has different looks, but that does not make one race better looking than another IMO. I bet a lot of women would jump at the chance for an Asian man, all you have to do is show your interest, and the stereotype is broken.

technohubz · 2012-12-05T18:00:10+00:00

This has been discussed before.

http://www.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/13ex8z/im_asian_and_find_nonasian_women_intimidating/

internalconflict22 · 2012-12-05T20:46:50+00:00

Being Asian =/= disadvantage

Thinking being asian is a disadvantage = disadvantage

seddAcct · 2012-12-05T19:43:24+00:00

Guys I found the problem - "dressed alternatively hipster "

takenoshit1 · 2012-12-05T21:02:19+00:00

Stop seeing yourself as asian and start seeing yourself as a fucking man. When looking at women don't see them as caucasion or asian or black and start see them as women. Race is no issue with human interaction (for me at least). I see people for who they are what they have to offer for me. The more you dwell on your race as a disadvantage, the more your "game" will be at standstill. You need to stop this mindset that race is an issue.

You're a fucking man, be a fucking man, and stop making excuses. This post come up every once in a while and, I get so angry when race become an issue. Women can senses your apprehensions and insecurities. When you are speaking with women or with anyone at that matter, just listen to them stop looking at their race. Observe what they have to offer. One thing I despise are race jokes. I think they are tasteless and not funny at all. Avoid people who make them, and i call them out on them.

Confidence!! Confidence!! Confidence!!! Stop being a bitch about your race!! Stop making excuses!!!

Just my little rant...

I am a short asian MAN, and i have sutter, I have dated taller women, had 2 threesomes, dated a range of white, spanish, asian, irish, black women. I see what they half to offer, not if they are just pretty, i have turned down pretty women because they were lame. A lot of them always say, I don't usually date, or your my first asian, (blah blah blah). My response to that, "OK" then i move on to something else. That is because i don't give a fuck about race. Good luck on your journey, on this.

WarriorHawk · 2012-12-05T18:41:21+00:00

It's in your head dude. There are women of all types who won't date or hookup with a specific ethnicity, but are you really losing out? I know I wouldn't want someone that judgmental in my life.

infernalspacemonkey · 2012-12-05T18:44:17+00:00

Hey man, I'm Filipino (from the Midwest) and I know where you're coming from. I agree with the other comments here that it has a lot to do with demographics. I've had the fortune to meet a couple of caucasian females who love asian men, but I agree it's not nearly as large a margin as caucasian (or black) men who have yellow fever for asian women.

What I think you should do (as suggested in other threads here) is channel that self-negativity away from yourself. Nothing kills the all attractive self-confidenece more than the thought, "She's not into me."

Again on demographics: I never had much luck in the Midwest, but when I travelled to San Francisco, Seattle, Czech Republic and Belarus (and Southeast Asia) I found that caucasian girls who grew up with asian guys tended to be more friendlly and more likely to "hook up".

Don't sweat it. I don't know how old you are, but you always have the ultimate asian advantage: you'll age well and look much younger than your counterparts when you're in your 40s and 50s. It'll get better if you're still into straight up phyiscal attraction at that age.

SenseiCAY · 2012-12-05T18:49:26+00:00

I'm Asian as well, and the stereotype of us being timid and non-sexual beings doesn't exactly help, but it's really only as much of a hindrance as you let it be. Every girl I've been with has been Caucasian (except for one...my first girlfriend was black).

Something from "Shit My Dad Says" to think about (I'm paraphrasing because I don't remember the quote verbatim):

Let her decide why she won't sleep with you. Don't decide for her.

Pollike · 2012-12-05T20:42:43+00:00

Let me put it this way. I'm assuming from your description that there aren't a lot of asian people in general in your area. I know for one thing, a lot of asian girls like strictly asian guys. I'm half-chinese/half-caucasian and I particularly love asian girls, but sometimes i'm not even asian enough for them. On the other hand, a lot of the asian girls im into love white boys. There happen to be a lot of asian girls in my area, so I know this for a fact. I also know that if I was another ethnicity (not to single out anybody in particular) there would be an entirely different demographic thats into me.

Point is that maybe the demographics of your area dont particularly pertain to asian males, but there are definitely girls out there that will be into you. You can't go around thinking nobody is into you. It's a mindset.

YouCantSeeMeee · 2012-12-05T21:24:18+00:00

Tbh everyone could come up with any excuse for why women don't want to be with them. Anyone and everyone. Trust me, it's not cause you're asian.

Supajin · 2012-12-05T21:48:06+00:00

You're dealt a hand of cards in life that you can't change, look to take advantage of it, not to look at it as a disadvantage.

Control the things that aren't biological, such as confidence, this makes you seem insecure to me. I'm Persian and I know that every girl doesn't want to date a Persian, just like some girls don't want to date White guys, just move past them and go to the next one.

superyay · 2012-12-05T21:51:54+00:00

First come to the realization you cannot fault HUMANS for basing their views off culturally perpetuated stereotypes. It's a fact of life and people can whine and cry about it, but it isn't going to change.

Is it harder? Definitely. Women in a white world won't look at us first, so we need to get noticed. How do you do that? You approach.

technohubz · 2012-12-05T21:59:57+00:00

Now I'm back home I can properly give my take on your questions. Short answer - Being asian is NOT a disadvantage. Please please please change your inner game and frame to embracing who you are. Some girls I've dated have loved the fact I'm Chinese and can show them a whole different culture rather then the average white man.

I'm a British Born Chinese and therefore all my girlfriends have been white, the closest to Chinese has been a half Italian/Chinese girl. You're not the typical asian guy, so I guess that is a start. Don't make excuses not to approach.

What I've learnt is confidence is key, being bold, out-going and funny. Though this could be said to any AFC.

I'm not trying to be nasty but I used to be like this, until I said f--k it. Why should I fear being asian, I'm not at a disadvantage.

I think you should start approaching more white girls on campus. Look at it this way, if you have the boldness to go up to a girl and ask her out confidently then you'll be fine. You've done more then the white guy stood there watching you pick up this girl.

White guy, Asian guy, Black guy - Be the guy who approaches first.

need_more_lube · 2012-12-05T22:16:05+00:00

Self Limiting mindset much?

sakuyuichiro · 2012-12-06T00:22:58+00:00

I'm Asian and 6'2, dressed well and all of that. I don't have difficulty at all but I live in LA, it is super diverse here and it is sometimes comical because I have a harder time with Asian girls from Asia. Anyways, just step up your game it ain't hard.

absolutebeginners · 2012-12-05T19:01:28+00:00

Can we add this to the sidebar?

Idontlikekarmawhores · 2012-12-05T19:49:25+00:00

Well if you think about it in a positive way; You have 99% of anime chicks begging for your cock ( implying you are a "kind of" hot korean boy with cute hair).

2012-12-05T20:24:04+00:00

Hey man don't sweat it, it's not like being asian helps but it's not a big disadvantage. You're tall, most asians are shorter (which is a huge disadvantage and the main reason I think asians aren't as in high demand).

Luminaire · 2012-12-05T21:23:43+00:00

In the community there are guys who are in their 50's who routinely pick up super hot girls in their 20's (search for Bullet).

There are guys in wheelchairs and with other disabilities who do well (check out Sean Stephenson).

Stop looking for bullshit reasons you can't do it.

aznkriss133 · 2012-12-05T21:35:23+00:00

Asian here. It's not about your ethnicity, but rather how you behave and carry yourself. As someone said earlier, you'll age well. Hell I don't think im old enough to see that yet but judging from my parents, that holds true. Just be optimistic and believe in yourself.

destinys_parent · 2012-12-05T21:49:54+00:00

You are typically not on their radar by default, but if you up your game it won't be much of an issue. You have to be confident and escalate.

MyMotivation · 2012-12-05T22:36:42+00:00

Kong from Simple Pickup doesn't seem to have a problem

TREVI5001 · 2012-12-05T22:44:26+00:00

Simplepickup on youtube is comprised of a skinny guy with middle eastern complexion, an average guy with asian features, and a slightly stocky guy who is Caucasian. Some of you in seddit may not like them, but their race hasn't hampered things.

backtothegame · 2012-12-05T23:33:36+00:00

Not a disadvantage but more of a specialty. Consult the works of JT Tran (Asian Playboy) who has made a living but also demonstrated a lot of success on this specific issue. The shortness issue is normally the main thing so at 6' 2" I would say you have next to nothing to be concerned about.

Demographically the only real hurdles are male heights under 5'7", black men who want to date asian women, and black women who want to date white men.

Lewan72 · 2012-12-06T00:02:16+00:00

Being Asian can be a plus if you make a good impression, it makes you stand out/unique.

2012-12-06T00:38:03+00:00

Most of the hot girls in my city hang around asian guys...All the alpha males who got the chicks in my middle school were vietnamese...

2012-12-06T02:09:48+00:00

NO, it is NOT a disadvantage. If you think it is, then that is just a limiting belief in your head that you need to get rid of.

If you think you are not good enough for whatever insignificant reason, well guess what - you probably won't have success.

But if you know that you are good enough because you look after yourself, because you strive to improve yourself (which you obviously do because you are here in this subreddit), because you are the cool guy that you know you are, then guess what, women will notice it and like you for it.

If you've spent any time learning about pick up, you'll know that there are thousands of fat, ugly, old guys out there gaming women with success. Because THEY DON'T GIVE A FUCK. Sure they might be high value or something, but not giving a fuck is attractive. Giving a fuck about anything (your race, your job, etc) is needy.

Giving a fuck about your race means you are worried about getting the approval of a girl. You don't need her approval. If she senses that you are seeking her approval she will lose attraction. Instead you should just assume girls are attracted to you.

An Indian guy posted a very similar thing a couple of months ago. He was asking if his 'type' needed a special sub reddit for seduction. Me (and most of the people who replied to his thread) gave him the same, resounding answer: no, you don't need special treatment. You are a man like the rest of us.

Anyways it's pretty clear from most of the responses. Good luck!

alphacarinae · 2012-12-06T08:55:25+00:00

Asian girl here. I personally like asian guys, but I think it's due to the fact that I've grown up in an asian area, where that is the norm and being asian is a positive and attractive factor. So demographics may have something to do with it but isn't necessarily the only reason. Nationality isn't something that would be a disadvantage though. Women like a man who is confident. They want someone who is gonna initiate contact, show interest, and pursue them. Your race isn't important as long as you are attractive and confident. Women see potential hookups in guys who come off as someone who is hookupable.

YPaladin · 2013-05-10T18:22:24+00:00

This is exactly the mentality I've been trying to break myself out of. "I'm Asian she won't like me." Preaching to the choir man.

dkismet · 2012-12-05T21:38:03+00:00

Doesn't matter. I have a Chinese friend that's decent with girls, a Bangladesh friend that gets some attention as well.

for what it's worth, I'm white, and find asian girls intimidating sometimes. However, intimidation comes from a mindset. On a good night when my head is clear, I've worked groups of 6+ asians (m/f), and rocked it.

It's all about belief, confidence and momentum. Get out of your head and into the moment! have FUN

Kiwisubmission · 2013-03-19T03:51:49+00:00

Asian guy here and married to a white girl... I can only give you tough love... How much do you want this? If you really want it then nothing is stopping you.

Man_Myth_Mace · 2013-05-30T09:44:01+00:00

I am a little late but look up SimplePickup on YouTube. Three guys, one is Asian, not good looking. They will put your worries to rest.

billbutter · 2012-12-05T18:06:09+00:00

theres this girl I met on facebook who is OBSESSED with asians. She wont date anyone besides asian. She's black and thick and absolutely gorgeous. I don't understand the attraction but what I'm saying is go look for asian lovers. if youre in NJ ill give u her facebook

rko1985 · 2012-12-05T22:48:39+00:00

The good news is you are at an advantage picking up other asians...

hochul325 · 2012-12-06T11:03:16+00:00

there are people that seem to give boundless encouragement whenever one brings up this asian male topic. but i want to start off by admitting that, yes there is a barrier, and yes it is harder to get with white women. so let's not lie to ourselves now. having said that, if you truly believe that you're good looking and are capable of pulling hot women. it should not be a problem. not to beat off talking about myself, im a healthy looking, confident, college athlete at an ivy league school. in a top tier fraternity. through years of interaction with white women, i've come to realize that i need to take on a specific persona when it comes to white women. you really gotta try to take on that confident, cool, sexually aggressive (kino), and fun persona that many while males seem to display. at parties, learn to fucking flirt with a girl, kiss her on the cheek, and go in for the close like a confident man, if she denies it, fuck it, laugh it off. learn to consistently give sexual innuendos like a dominant man would.

truth is truth, it WILL be harder to get with white chicks. but there are a plenty of asian dudes slaying hot white chicks right now.

Title	Being asian...A disadvantage?
Author	FeelingRain
Upvotes	2
Comments	54
Date	December 5, 2012 5:35 PM UTC (13 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/14bxw8/being_asiana_disadvantage/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/being-asiana-disadvantage.1343799 https://theredarchive.com/post/1343799

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