Should I just go clubbing? [recovered]

surfershane25 · 2022-03-13T04:44:59+00:00

Bars and clubs have wildly different atmospheres, a cozy dive bar is easier for me to talk to women and get results than a super loud dance floor where I might dance with or make out with there but it doesn’t lead back home or anywhere as often. But online dating if you can get good photos and write well.

2022-03-13T04:14:06+00:00

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burncushlikewood · 2022-03-13T04:50:33+00:00

If you have friends to go with sure, you need a wing out there man it's too tough to solo. Day game I would suggest to you, the old saying is that 99% of guys don't approach during the day, but it's the best time to meet girls

bestmenrmenatbest · 2022-03-13T20:39:31+00:00

If you want to stop being a virgin, first you gotta work on yourself physically, dress well, smell good, have a good haircut, don’t be fat.

Next, if you want to go to bars or clubs imitate someone who gets a lot of women. Don’t buy any woman drinks, don’t stare, be in your own world so to speak and watch for a woman sending you signals. The key is you gotta be sure she wants you otherwise if you get rejected by her, it gets worse and every woman there would have seen it.

scientist_1990 · 2022-03-13T07:11:46+00:00

I suggest dance class. You can learn salsa or something that’s not “bumping” music. The gym is a good place to meet girls, just don’t interrupt their workout, I would approach a girl on the way in, way out, or in between exercises. Club is a hard environment especially in the bigger cities. You gotta be confident if you wanna pull a girl in a club and smash in one night. Are their any hobbies you haven’t tried yet that might have women ?

echoKj · 2022-03-13T04:14:07+00:00

Idk, I normally don't go clubbing to find hookups or a potential gf. But it never hurts to try I guess

CocoBabeNYC · 2022-03-13T06:09:41+00:00

No, sitting at home and jerking off ia much better for you.

throwawayvirginacct · 2022-03-13T08:16:48+00:00

There are so many venues to meet women beside bars and clubs. You can meet women out and about, in school, work, events, or social activities. You can do online dating or talk to women with social media. You can build your social circle and meet friends through other friends.

joelvaldezg · 2022-03-13T17:25:18+00:00

Have you ever been in a club? I used to say clubs aren’t my things but now I go almost weekly to one. I’d say go clubbing, but with your friends, it’s tough to go alone.

Unfair-Ad-7015 · 2022-03-13T17:42:56+00:00

You could go clubbing but it wouldn’t deal with the underlying reasons why you’re a virgin at 25. Work on yourself bro. Gym, money and game. Work on those three aspects.

DanieTB99 · 2022-03-13T06:12:27+00:00

If you wanna go clubs to get puss then go to trashy places late. A couple hours before closing some girls seem very eager to leave with a guy

iceking123 · 2022-03-13T07:25:58+00:00

Don’t go, you’re just gonna end up getting girls that don’t like you pretend to like you for free drinks. Or they’ll just walk away. Unless you’re super attractive which you’re probably not. Then focus on going out doing things you enjoy. Start going to social clubs like playing soccer or going to church. Whatever you may like. This is the best way to find someone that you are interested in. Dating is a numbers game so give yourself value and ask yourself what interest does my ideal partner have. And then become the person that shares her interests. You just pick from there. Just be yourself and act cool. Dress to impress and woman will be attracted to your confidence.

PsilocybinDisciple · 2022-03-13T07:54:02+00:00

If you don’t like bars and clubs you’re not gonna enjoy girls who like bars and clubs with medium to long term dating. Just a thought, not trying to discourage because clubbing is a social lubricant.

rahhumilovedogs · 2022-03-13T04:21:14+00:00

Not a fan of clubbing a bar could be good! Worste case you can bs with bartender n people keep coming up

throwawayvirginacct · 2022-03-13T07:44:18+00:00

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Harris343 · 2022-03-13T14:19:38+00:00

Don’t go clubbing just for the sole purpose of trying to get with girls because a lot of the time you’ll add too much pressure and will ruin your night. Aim to go out with friends have a good time and see what happens. Also not to judge but how are you talking to women because going to a club isn’t just going to fix everything. My choice for you would be tinder but I’m assuming you’ve used it. Anyway go to the club somewhat often and the smoking area is a really good time to just talk to people that’s where I’m most successful personally.

WagerGoat · 2022-03-13T17:29:38+00:00

Try going out to public places in general and you’ll see how you can meet women just by picking up your order from a curbside

Johny_Silver_Hand · 2022-03-13T06:38:29+00:00

If you enjoy killing Seals then go for it.

SaltoDaKid · 2022-03-13T07:07:44+00:00

Any activity like you’ll find girl like walking at park or downtown. Maybe joining local club. Club nice but it’s sometimes the double edge sword for men, beware money grouser, that are club with fee, girl who ask you for a drink. Enjoy what you like to do and stay fresh.

Expert-Lemmon · 2022-03-13T08:48:14+00:00

If you don't have experience then id say go to a bar or something first. it can be hard to work on your game if you can barley hear the girl you walked up to. Or you could meet up with someone there. I like bars on busy Friday nights with different options in case you strike out. Which ever you choose bring friends to keep you from overthinking or doubting yourself

jjboy91 · 2022-03-13T08:56:30+00:00

Personally I don't like clubs at all so I wouldn't. Bars where I live, you can't stand up and have to pick a table so this sucks too. I do meet people from my hobbies but they are only interested by a friendship.

Maybe you can try to help people in need or something like that

2022-03-13T10:49:21+00:00

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recyclablebanthas · 2022-03-13T10:52:29+00:00

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BackFlashy2939 · 2022-03-13T06:30:25+00:00

Work on yourself first, but also you don't need to meet girls at bars or clubs, you can meet them at cafes , activities, other events or whatever.

PrimitiveAlienz · 2022-03-13T15:58:10+00:00

Well i can’t tell you what you should do because i’m in a similar boat but honestly clubbing worked out the worst for me out of everything i tried. I had more luck speaking to people when i boulder (indoor climbing stuff) but the only woman i managed to speak to there turned out to be a lesbian and now we are friends so who the fuck knows.

epimpstyle · 2022-03-13T20:49:46+00:00

Nobody says anything about drunk girls in clubbing. They might go to toilette telling you to wait a minute but they disappear :-)

Also, it is a tough competition because you are not alone, any girl can choose someone else, if you are not good looking than the chances are very small because any girl will go in a club with a friend and usually they don't want to show to their best friend an average looking guy. Usually your effort is double because you must conquer the girl but also you must conquer her best (girl) friend - than you have the green light to step further.

To pick up girls it is better in another place (even on the streets).

silkPJson · 2022-03-14T01:45:30+00:00

If you’re not comfortable clubbing then don’t go. Maybe bars would be better?

Otherwise I would suggest hobbies (although this can be difficult to find depending on where you live) or volunteering?

DMNC87 · 2022-03-14T02:06:08+00:00

Try out clubs and see if you can thrive in that environment

I personally don’t. I do well in the smokers corner outside where people are just hanging out. I can’t for the life of me have a successful conversation inside a bar or club

Maybe I could in a vip section/table where it’s more intimate

The point is try and find where you function well and stick to those environments

recyclablebanthas · 2022-03-14T02:48:49+00:00

1

I'm a 25yo virgin and neither my job or my hobbies have girls around and I didn't go to college.

There's a lot about college that leads to meeting new people. The circumstances involve a bunch of people of the same age all gathering in roughly the same place at roughly the same times.

A lot of that can be duplicated if you know how. A great way can be to simply do a search on FB for groups that hold regular events. Just type in your city + some topic, interest, or hobby.

There are a ton of options here:

Social partner dancing: if you have to end up somewhere dancing, this option is way better. Completely different atmosphere than your typical bar or club. Salsa, lindy hop, argentine tango, west coast swing, etc. Lots of choices, depending on the vibe or music you like.
Board game nights
Hiking groups
Couch-surfing meets: hang with travelers and people who like hanging with travelers.

And so on....

2

I'm not really into bars or clubs, I don't dance or like bumping music but I may not have a choice.

Basic rule of thumb is: don't try to change who you are just to get laid.

Like, of course, if you have problems with your basic social skills, then level those up. But you shouldn't have to go to clubs if you don't like the very things that clubs are organized around.

In fact, it's going to hurt your inner game to make yourself to places you hate just to meet people who actually like going to those places for fun. Think about it, people go there to have fun and so people who hate being there, are going to have a hard time being fun, and will drag down the vibe. Which hurts one's chances of getting anywhere.

It's a similar mistake that people might make if they go to church to find someone, when they're not religious.

3

....sitting at home thing is obviously not going to help.

Definitely not. But there are a lot of options here. Bars and clubs are far from the only options. They're just well-known.

Title	Should I just go clubbing? [recovered]
Author	throwawayvirginacct [recovered]
Upvotes	50
Comments	63
Date	March 13, 2022 4:08 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/tcymze/should_i_just_go_clubbing/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/should-i-just-go-clubbing.1264716 https://theredarchive.com/post/1264716

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