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[–]SenorAlfredo 50 points51 points52 points 14 years ago (10 children) | Copy Link
That's also what I do when I've forgotten her name.
I think the most important thing about this is that you had a good conversation with him, felt comfortable, and then he told you to give him the number rather than asking for it. Good man :)
[–]GoP-Demon 5 points6 points7 points 14 years ago (9 children) | Copy Link
naw. Ask her to spell her name and then shes like, Lisa or something.
[–][deleted] 11 points12 points13 points 14 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
"good. because i had this class once with this girl whose name was spelled L-E-E-S-S-A, i shit you not."
[–]PasDeDeux 2 points3 points4 points 14 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I do this almost every time.
Several times, it has actually been a strange spelling.
[–]Horatio__Caine 1 point2 points3 points 14 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Trust me - we know when you're covering up for forgetting. We just forgive you if we like you. But we'd like you more if you remembered.
[–][deleted] 3 points4 points5 points 14 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
i actually just ask, because i seriously suck at remembering names. i'm getting better, but habits are hard to break/establish. if i'm feeling cheeky, i say, "you name starts with...a letter..."
but normally, i just ask.
[–]Horatio__Caine 2 points3 points4 points 14 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Good. Alpha as fuck, etc etc.
Lying to hide embarrassment is not alpha.
[–][deleted] 14 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
[permanently deleted]
[–]new_player 2 points3 points4 points 14 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Jenny eh. 867-5309
[–]Numerous1 1 point2 points3 points 14 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
And then you go "No no no, I meant your last name"
[–]govnah 9 points10 points11 points 14 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
ive done this. except i threw the phone at her while drunk. she was ready for it though and a good sport in catching it.
words: me - hey.. youre cool. put you're thing in that. her - catch ::laughing::
good stuff.
[–]WolfInTheField 18 points19 points20 points 14 years ago (14 children) | Copy Link
This is basically the first thing most of us learned :P But if some newby picks this up, it's good advice.
I also like this one: Man up and fucking tell her that you think she's hot/cool/awesome, and you want her number, like james bond on acid. :D
[–]t0dk0n13 points 14 years ago [recovered] (11 children) | Copy Link
I already think I'm James Bond, now I just need acid!
[–]WolfInTheField 11 points12 points13 points 14 years ago (10 children) | Copy Link
Dude, we have so much to talk about.
[–]t0dk0n1 points 14 years ago [recovered] (9 children) | Copy Link
Indeed! As a child James Bond was my idol, if you will. I told all the kids in the yard that I was a spy (sounds more like Archer now that I think of it) and they'd call me out on it. But now that I'm an adult, gosh darn it, I am my own flavor of James Bond! What's your story?
[–]WolfInTheField 1 point2 points3 points 14 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link
I watched a bond flick when I was 9, and it taught me about sex. Then I watched more of them as I grew up, and I realized the man was a pussymagnet. Now I discovered this community, and realize that the ol' double-O is good for a couple of big O's, if you know what I'm saying.
The movies are such an awesome way to learn about shit like tonality, frame and body language.
And I like the part with 'my own flavor of bond'. Finding my own identity has always been hard for me.
[–]t0dk0n1 points 14 years ago [recovered] (7 children) | Copy Link
Not only is he a pussy magnet, he's a man of action, get's shit done!
It's kind of like how each actor that's played Bond, they always have a different way of relaying the character. I too have got my own way. But I'm also my own person beyond my bond persona :P.
[–]WolfInTheField 1 point2 points3 points 14 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
Makes sense. I long to incorporate personae like Bond and Morrison (who was more of a persona than a person, as he carefully crafted his own myth) in my own personality. I guess I'm a bit of a dreamer/actor... :P
[–]lancepants42 2 points3 points4 points 14 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
So are you going to ask for his number or what?
[–]WolfInTheField 0 points1 point2 points 14 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Whose exactly? xP
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 14 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Thanks to you guys, I'm going to watch a Bond movie.
Me too. I'm going for casino royale and quantum of solace for today. How 'bout you?
[–]selfamusingprophecy 0 points1 point2 points 14 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
What makes you think you are better off incorporating anybody's personae instead of just being the best you? Nobody can beat you at being you.
Nothing makes me think that. I'm just very fascinated with these people, and so rises the urge to incorporate parts of them in me. Also, yeah, I'm the best at being me, but am I the best me I can be? ;) Trying to answer that question can be very risky, as I've found that, especially with stuff like incorporating other personae into your own, you can lose the way quickly.
i used to be alpha.
then i dated a chick for 5 years.
now im not in college anymore, and i've forgotten how i ever did well with women. i'm fine at initiating conversation (when the opportunity arises, I'm not so good about approaching and making my own opportunities).
but i'll tell you, i don't think i'll have that problem anymore. and it is because i whole heartedly identify with james bond on acid.
Awesome :) Now go out and do it!
[–]t0dk0n5 points 14 years ago [recovered] (2 children) | Copy Link
I pretty much do this with most of the girls I get numbers from. We talk for a good bit, while she's talking about something; I'll put her name in my phone and just hand it over without saying anything and instead look straight into her eyes and listen attentively, commenting/buzzing into convo when it's my cue. After we finish the thought, I then try to arrange some immediate 'date' where I proclaim how I couldn't forgive myself if I didn't get to know them more. Anyway, most girls seem to like my style lol. Only time it didn't work was when I was way tired in the AM taking a night owl bus home where I hadn't built enough rapport and the girl tried to give me her facebook (which I don't fuck with) hahaha.
[–]cryer 1 point2 points3 points 14 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
That's really presumptuous. Interesting that it works. I can imagine a girl being like, "Um... you want my number?" And kind of debating it. So again, interesting that it works.
[–]heckz 0 points1 point2 points 14 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
We are presumptuous. Anyway, it does work.
[–]porphyry3 8 points9 points10 points 14 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I guess it's a common technique used by sedditors
[–][deleted] 4 points5 points6 points 14 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
And this was only upvoted because its a woman. This is how I always ask for a number. It's nothing revolutionary.
[–]_aserettt 2 points3 points4 points 14 years ago (10 children) | Copy Link
I almost NEVER give out my number. EVER.
What do you say when guys ask? I never figured out this one :S
[–]SoBoredAtWork 6 points7 points8 points 14 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link
"Sorry, I'm not interested"
or even better, "Sorry, I have a boyfriend"
If the guy isn't a fool or a douche, he'll simply say, "oh, no worries. cheers." and walk away.
[–]t0dk0n5 points 14 years ago [recovered] (7 children) | Copy Link
Haha, I make them laugh about all the fun they'll miss out on and end up changing the conversation, maybe call them out and be like ".. why do girls ALWAYS think I'm hitting on them?! Just trying to make new friends.", but I'm never ill hearted about it. I just saw this old Schwarzenegger movie called Commando, one of the henchmen gets all pissed off as he's rejected from some woman he's belligerently hitting on, calling her a "stupid whore". But he was supposed to come off as an insecure creeper anyway. The sad part is that people like that actually exist and take rejection too personally.
[–]SoBoredAtWork 3 points4 points5 points 14 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
".. why do girls ALWAYS think I'm hitting on them?! Just trying to make new friends."
I like this.
And agreed, if you do like the girl maybe you want to stick around instead of walking away - and you're so right - don't get pissed or be a dick about it. Just say no worries (however you want to word it) and continue with any conversation.
[–]_aserettt 2 points3 points4 points 14 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Sorry, I'm not interested
didn't work for me, he simply said (similar to t0dk0n's comment) "hey, i just wanted to be friends, dont get too excited!" and i ended up leaving my digits in his phone
Sorry, I have a boyfriend
He really could say the same thing... about being friends. But i could not bluntly lie about that. Moral issues? Lying's something I can't tolerate.
Also, how can I tell if a guy is hitting on me or wants to be friends? Do guys approach girls thinking, I want to be her friend?
[–]SoBoredAtWork 2 points3 points4 points 14 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Do guys approach girls thinking, I want to be her friend?
No. The only situation I could think of is if it's a friend of a friend and you're all out for drinks or something. But a completely random person that wants to be friends? Why? He doesn't even know you. So I'm gonna say, 95% of the time they're not looking for a simple friendship.
To answer your question, I see this situation panning out... he says the "I just wanted to be friends" line, simply say "sorry" and walk away. Chances are if the guy asked for your number, he's confident enough to ask someone else for theirs. He's been rejected before and can handle it. He knows there's other girls out there and he's not going home and crying about it, so stop worrying about it and just say 'no, sorry'.
[–]t0dk0n2 points 14 years ago [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
Definitely, gotta be persistent. I may make an awesome new friend if nothing else. A mantra, not of my own creation, but that I've now come to live by is "Never be outcome dependent, but always be closing". Stole it from RSD: Blueprint.
You don't know how many times a girl's changed her mind about giving her number to me just because I was calm, chill, and sociable.
[–]SoBoredAtWork 1 point2 points3 points 14 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
changed her mind about giving her number to me just because I was calm, chill, and sociable.
hell yes! blowing it off like it's no big deal is HUGE and can totally change the outcome.
I love this one.
ESPECIALLY when I'm hitting on them
[–]miss-mafiosa 0 points1 point2 points 14 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I'm usually kinda rude/straightforward about it. "Let's not and say we did" that kind of thing.
[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 14 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
That's called confidence. Instead of giving his number to you and hope he calls, or texting you hoping you text back, he gets straight to the pont.
[–]barnesa90 2 points3 points4 points 14 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
Girl here. This has happened to me and it's super awkward so even if you don't like the guy, you feel compelled to give him your number. Sometimes, if I don't have my phone in my hand, I'll give him a fake number; that clearly doesn't work if he proceeds to call you right after while you're still in his presence. But if I do give him my number out of pity, I'll probably ignore his texts and calls until he gets the hint.
[–]_aserettt 1 point2 points3 points 14 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
exactly what i do... i have a hard time rejecting guys when it comes to numbers. i try the whole, no thanks, im not interested speel, but ... it just doesnt work so well.
i've also said "i dont have a phone". I was pretty drunk, and my gut told me not to share information like phone numbers ... as soon as i said that, my phone went off. i dipped asap.
[–]barnesa90 0 points1 point2 points 14 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
hahaha I say "I don't have a phone" and then someone calls or texts at that same moment -__-
[–]_aserettt 1 point2 points3 points 14 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
!! im not the only one :D i could never do that sober though.. i have too much of a conscience to lie, even to a stranger i dont want to see again :( whats wrong with me.
[–]Paramorgue 1 point2 points3 points 14 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Yup thats how i always do it too...works like a charm :)
[–]miss-mafiosa 0 points1 point2 points 14 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
then spread your wisdom bro! :D
[–]Paramorgue 1 point2 points3 points 14 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Maybe I should make a post on here...never really thought about it...but I pretty much always get what I want. I just gotta figure out how I do it lol.
[–]ialsolovebees 1 point2 points3 points 14 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Was he handsome and/or attractive?
he was decent.
[–]nextAccount 1 point2 points3 points 14 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Thanks for sharing this - I for one appreciate the female perspective on something like this working.
[–][deleted] 7 points8 points9 points 14 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link
_^
I liked it until this part
[–]sirolf1 points 14 years ago* [recovered] (6 children) | Copy Link
Haha I know what you mean. Yet at the same time: I'm not sure why there's a difference between ^_^ en :)
[–]t0dk0n2 points 14 years ago [recovered] (5 children) | Copy Link
^_^ is cuter and more cheery, maybe almost overjoyed. I perceived :) as a genuine smile.
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 14 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
I hate them both with all my heart.
[–]t0dk0n14 points 14 years ago [recovered] (3 children) | Copy Link
Okay, Mr. Sunshine.
[–]miss-mafiosa 2 points3 points4 points 14 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
:(
[–]JacksInflatedEgo 1 point2 points3 points 14 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Apply the Wadsworth Constant.
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 14 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
to the whole paragraph
[–][deleted] 4 points5 points6 points 14 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Also the whole prerequisite of him probably being attractive and fit... You forgot that part.
[–]miss-mafiosa 1 point2 points3 points 14 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
ACTUALLY, he was a nerdy looking boy. Not buff at all, but he was pretty attractive.
[–]cryer 2 points3 points4 points 14 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Yep. It isn't creepy if you're attracted to him, right ladies?
[–]RedErin 3 points4 points5 points 14 years ago (10 children) | Copy Link
Yep, this is common Seddit advice. Sounds like you got picked up by a pua. :)
They're much more fun than regular guys amirite?
[–]_aserettt 2 points3 points4 points 14 years ago (9 children) | Copy Link
They are!! Dealing with 2-3 guys right now. One definitely knows how this stuff works and it just makes everything more interesting. With the other ones, im like ... uhhhh buddy, are u serious?
[–]cryer 2 points3 points4 points 14 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
Tell us more? Would be interesting to learn about your experience, especially versus "the other ones"
[–]_aserettt 0 points1 point2 points 14 years ago* (4 children) | Copy Link
what do you want to know? i was gunna start a new thread but didnt know what to write .. ... derrp.
[–]cryer 0 points1 point2 points 14 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
What do you perceive as the differences between the two kind of guys? What do the guys who know this stuff do for you, specifically? And what about the other guys? What are some examples?
When you say "uhhhh buddy, are u serious?" - what do you mean? What actions or behavior prompt this reaction? What could they have done differently that would have made a positive difference?
[–]_aserettt 0 points1 point2 points 14 years ago* (2 children) | Copy Link
one is subscribed to seddit.... (which means no more FR's about him), i'll describe the other one.
[–]cryer 0 points1 point2 points 14 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
wow.. interesting.
What is a "shit test"? And what did he say/do that made you think he was too beta? If you know the smooth talkers/douchebags are, frankly, douchebags then why do you like them? You like douchebags? The type with the Ed Hardy shirts and aggressive attitudes that look like they're compensating for something? If so, why? What is it about it?
What about compared to a guy who is more introspective? Let's say he's just as physically attractive, just styled less douchey and more laidback in attitude? I realize this is subjective but wondering about what you think.
This sounds like a very genuine and honest response, something to appreciate - why do you not like it? If he really thinks you're cute and is looking forward to seeing you, why is that bad? What's wrong with being genuine?
What made you give him your number in the first place then?
[–]_aserettt 0 points1 point2 points 14 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I approached him at the club. bad idea :/
knowing that he just split w his girl, and is telling me he thinks I'm cute & wants to meet up all the time, isn't going to work well with me. if he didn't break up w his girl 3-4 days ago, that would be different.
he was too eager to please me. I guess I do have a thing for douchebag types of guys. it's not that I like assholes, it's just that, the guys who carry themselves with that type of confidence ends up being assholes. I think?
it's true - women have no idea what they want. :)
Hahah, women are funny.
Basic advice. If you're not doing this, you're an idiot.
[–]TENAXIS 0 points1 point2 points 14 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
i've been taking numbers like that for the past 4 years (18). I thought that was the most-BASIC line to ask for a number.
How did other people ask for numbers??
[–]miss-mafiosa 4 points5 points6 points 14 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
"ay shawty can i git cho numbahh???"
[–]TENAXIS 3 points4 points5 points 14 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Seems Legit.
Ok, but the question is what happens next? Does he call you? Text you? How long until he does? What does he say when he calls? Or when he texts? And do you respond?
Also, this is interesting I guess but I honestly thought it was obvious. If you're having a good time conversing with a girl and it's going smoothly and both people are relaxed, then of course you'll ask her for her number. But I suppose the difference is it was in mid-conversation? I honestly think that would be weird. A sudden change of topic.
Also, I have less of a problem asking for a number after already being comfortable and having a good time with a girl. That's not so much an issue (though it can still not go well, sure) - the major issue is the approach and finding something to say (that lasts) and not look stupid.
WELL, he texted me the next morning, and wished me a safe trip home. He told me to text him after I got off my plane.
He's never called me, but we have texted.
And it was like.. snuck into mid-convo. We kinda had to do our part and clean up the reception area so he kinda just handed me his phone..
[–]iantheaardvark 0 points1 point2 points 14 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
The real question is: have you banged yet?
HA, no. I found out that he has a gf, so that was a NO.
[–]baianobranco 0 points1 point2 points 14 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I've definitely done that, that way I get her name spelled right!
[–]no_dating 0 points1 point2 points 14 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
This gets you the number just fine.
What I want to know is did you pick up his calls?
He never called, but I did reply to his texts.
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 14 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
groomsmen: want.
[–]Polemicist82 0 points1 point2 points 14 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
That's always good advice
[–]Jrix -1 points0 points1 point 14 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Admit it, you want to downvote so badly but you can't possibly think to harm this naive cute little soul.
[–][deleted] -1 points0 points1 point 14 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
lol
[–]bink1time -1 points0 points1 point 14 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
So some guy asked for your number in a social circle setting. In the most standard way possible. And you decided that this was the most revolutionary thing and merited a post.
Why thank you godly woman. What would I ever do without you.
[–]th1nker -1 points0 points1 point 14 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Wow, why didn't I ever think about that. So you're pretty cool, can I have your number so we can talk more? (I'm perfectly casual by the way)
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