Getting over your approach anxiety?

on_the_dl · 2010-11-15T09:56:09+00:00

Beer isn't helping?

Anyway, next time, just ask yourself, "What could possibly go wrong?" You'll realize that you have nothing to lose and everything to gain. Even getting shot down feels better than the regret of doing nothing.

ThrowawayPUA · 2010-11-15T08:26:11+00:00

If she's trying to make eye contact with you, all you have to do is go over to her (immediately) and say hello. Or maybe "hello I'm mpm4, what's your name?"

Just start doing approaches. Expect to be shot down and then you can only be pleasantly surprised when you don't get shot down. Just do a few hundred approaches and you will have all AA and fears of rejection totally eliminated forever. Study more pickup instructional material (look over on the link on the right sidebar, "new to this subreddit?).

philosarapter · 2010-11-15T18:07:22+00:00

First off: Why not take the fact that she is clearly checking you out to be a compliment and an invitation to go and talk to her? If she is making eye contact with you multiple times, it means she finds you attractive. This is a good thing, not a reason to freeze up. Arm yourself with this knowledge and go up and open up a conversation.

"Hey this girl thinks I'm attractive, I'm going to talk to her and see if she is interesting to me."

The trick is to quit this "outwardly-in" thinking ("What will she think of me, what if she doesn't like me") and start with "inwardly-out" thinking ("What do I think of her body? I really like that shirt she is wearing, I am going to tell her about it.")

Notice how you are putting yourself as the subject of the sentence? Thats important... because you can actually make declar

crookers · 2010-11-15T08:42:10+00:00

BY PRACTICING

squigs · 2010-11-15T21:05:11+00:00

Talk to someone else first. It makes you seem more desirable and increases your own confidence. I'll always start off chatting to someone I'm not attracted to and just looks interesting (guys or girls - doesn't need to be flirting). Most people respond positively.

uchihavino · 2010-11-15T19:47:48+00:00

3 second rule. When I'm out and in a shitty mood, I just open shit sets to get into a more talkative mood. I'm usually blown out of set, but I at least laugh a little and move on to better sets and a better time.

side2 · 2010-11-16T02:56:48+00:00

Lately my approach on this is to purposely fail miserably. Find things that you would think would shut you down when saying it to a girl.

Here are a few I have tried.

Hey I'm thirsty get me a drink.
Hey I like your tits (have not been smacked yet. Did it at least 6 times now)
I like your ass
Ask a blonde what their natural hair color is
Are you drunk enough to take me home yet? (she says no) Ok let me buy you another.
Ask your friends if they want to have an orgy
How bout a threesome
I lost my number. What's yours?
Nice shoes, want to fuck (did not get smacked and she talked more after)
Pull a crazy girl in and tell her she is crazy (she loved it)
Do you like green? (if suprised) Do you like weed? (said slowly)

I don't have anymore yet but I am on a roll. Those were said over two days. BTW I gave a stripper a lap dance and got a free lap dance. Smiling goes a long way. Someone said just think about her fingering herself when your too tired to smile.

dark180 · 2010-11-16T03:53:23+00:00

3 second rule man, if by 3 seconds u dont know what to say , just say whatever comes out first. I dont know why but we tend to over-stress with openers, just think about what was the first thing any1 you have ever met told you, honestly I could not remember a single one, just say whatever and own it. Its easier said than done, I know, I still have trouble with it, I once opened a hb7 with "why is everything so wet?" (we where both walking out the metro station, and it was clear that it had been raining all day), it sounds retarded but i couldn't let her go without trying and my 3 seconds where out

warpcowboy · 2010-11-16T06:22:47+00:00

Anxieties will control your life until you confront them.

The only way to truly confront them is to flood your discomfort zone. Approach people and you'll soon find yourself too familiar with the act of approaching to make up all the fairytales in your head that used to drive your anxiety. Things you're routinely familiar with simply can't exist outside your comfort zone.

Mouthpiece · 2010-11-18T18:42:50+00:00

She was constantly glancing over at me but I locked up and couldn't come up with anything to say.

Don't say a word. Look her in the eye, smile, and wave her over to you. If she comes over, you're golden. If she refuses, just smile and move on.

Title	Getting over your approach anxiety?
Author	mpm4
Upvotes	10
Comments	18
Date	November 15, 2010 8:10 AM UTC (15 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/e6a6g/getting_over_your_approach_anxiety/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/getting-over-your-approach-anxiety.1312979 https://theredarchive.com/post/1312979

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