Specifically, what's holding you back from being really good with women?

social_scrying · 2014-02-22T16:37:09+00:00

im going out on a limb here, but im pretty sure for 90% of guys, AA is THE biggest sticking point for getting really good. Including myself.

haigooby · 2014-02-22T16:43:42+00:00

[permanently deleted]

ThePUA_Baddie · 2014-02-22T18:10:32+00:00

I would honestly say that I'm pretty decent with women. A couple years back I would say yea I wasn't confident around girls at all and would be pretty uncomfortable talking to them but now I can honestly say that if I see a cute girl and we were having a conversation I would be able to be confident about it by maintaining eye contact, cracking jokes, being myself, and being at ease. I can do all these things and enjoy myself and have a great time.

The reason I'm not in a relationship though is because I'm having a hard time finding a girl who I think is a attractive that also connects with me. I like asian girls so finding a girl who really clicks with me and seems interested enough in what I have to offer is really difficult. Most of the girls who i think are attractive don't see me in that sexual light even if I try to portray it that way.

All in all I think I'm just unlucky because I'm going after a specific range of girls and it'll probably take quite some digging and filtering until I can truly find someone who is interested in taking things a step further with me. And that's why I believe I am single.

pertichor · 2014-02-22T22:42:10+00:00

The skill to be in a large environment.

I'm at a college of 1100 people. You may not know everyone, but you sure as hell recognize the faces of everyone you see.

I know that it takes practice to get good, but when your fuck-ups are hung-up for everyone to see, it's sort of disheartening.

But on the other hand, it's even more disheartening when guys uglier, shorter, and less muscular than you are banging girls way hotter than you are.

AntixD · 2014-02-23T06:33:17+00:00

I'm afraid of rejection and a big pussy :( and i want to find a good girl,fuck me,right?

team_magma · 2014-02-23T15:39:00+00:00

I'm an average looking guy that dress well and in good shape.

I think my main problem is I overvalue the chick.

gggyyht8 · 2014-02-22T19:47:55+00:00

I have a lot of friends who happen to be girls, and I'm OK with that (hot friends ftw). But the thing is, I lack confidence. Whenever I find someone I could see myself dating, I fuck up somehow. Those couple times that I don't, I'm afraid of them leaving. Recently had my feelings and confidence fucking shot because she didn't see me as more than a friend and "doesn't want to talk to me ever again."

RadicalModerate00 · 2014-02-22T20:03:12+00:00

Opertunity.

charm3 · 2014-02-22T20:04:54+00:00

Getting day 2's . No god damned day 2 in a year ...so many numbers though.

Derptastrophe · 2014-02-22T20:29:29+00:00

I'm terrible at making small talk. I can start a conversation but can't keep it going long enough. Probably just my nerves, but the best way to get over that is to just keep at it, I'm thinking. I'm also pretty oblivious when it comes to making moves and recognizing subtle hints.

cameronb16 · 2014-02-22T21:53:22+00:00

im good with women. the problem I have is meeting them. im still in highschool in a small down and don't know many girls. the ones I do know are "friends" and no the type you could have a one night stand with (fuck it ill just say it these chicks aint slutty). whenever I go downtown with my buddies I meet girls and hit it off, sometimes followed with a K-Close, if I can isolate from our group of mutual friends.

so you tell me my problem, I just think I don't meet enough women. and I don't have anywhere to go and meet them

xD322x · 2014-02-22T22:09:27+00:00

Money. No way around that. It's just like I see no reason why any girl would want to date me if not having a car or a job while I'm in college.

So I end up sabotaging myself in that I don't want them to find out I'm not worth shit.

ihopethispcworks · 2014-02-22T22:13:16+00:00

Being in a high school where gossip spreads like crazy, accompanied with childhood trauma from bullying, I'm still struggling to not take things personally. I know what to do and what track I'm on but this holds me back sometimes, and I will never give up or give in. I only have the rest of this year and next until college.

ArtistBlock · 2014-02-22T22:28:39+00:00

Confidence, is what it is. I can say AA but its confidence that makes it up.

kalir · 2014-02-22T23:02:03+00:00

being at a college of a 1100 plus students where everyone seems to have their social skills together, i'm not really social or comfortable around people. being in a large environment and just talking to girls. i mean i can talk to them but to get something like their number or a date with them is tough on my emotions. what is disheartening is that i can see uglier less attractive guys than me get to bang girls just for the fun of it.

Food-Eater · 2014-02-22T23:40:44+00:00

my stammer

blackmamba329 · 2014-02-23T00:52:50+00:00

I'm a highschool student without a car (yet) with a mother who's ALWAYS at home. My home is also on the other side of town.

smellyegg · 2014-02-23T01:50:42+00:00

AA, it's all about AA.

projectJJK · 2014-02-23T02:56:26+00:00

Women can smell neediness coming from me a mile away. . I KNOW this but for the life of me I can't imagine how I come off to a female. I can't tell what it is about my behavior that triggers their sixth senses. I don't think it is the content but most likely body language and other non-verbal communications.

I'm actively investing in myself now to get rid of these terrible symptoms that seem to drive women away.

mistahARK · 2014-02-24T01:49:54+00:00

My main issue is over-investment, which eventually leads to one-itis. I have no idea how to cure myself of this.

subdominis · 2014-02-24T06:19:25+00:00

No issue opening a girl, but lose it when it comes to keeping the conversation going. I'm not sure, I feel like its in my head, but I overthink this part before I approach. "How do I keep the conversation going?" is my biggest issue. Saw a post on here today that someone asked "What do you do that makes you happy?" or something along those lines. Definitely going to be incorporating that.

chriscilantro · 2014-02-25T04:10:48+00:00

I over think way too much, and as a result get nervous.

dcthebrohan · 2014-02-26T02:56:06+00:00

Not being white.

SriSriRaviShankar · 2014-02-23T01:01:52+00:00

The being attractive piece.

ItsNotAScam · 2014-02-22T17:45:13+00:00

A very generalized answer for everyone would be "lack of skill with PUA material".

My largest flaw is sometimes I forget women's names since I sleep with so many of them and a good percentage of those are more or less interchangeable.

Title	Specifically, what's holding you back from being really good with women?
Author	jahvoncreamcone
Upvotes	14
Comments	44
Date	February 22, 2014 4:25 PM UTC (12 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1ympsi/specifically_whats_holding_you_back_from_being/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/specifically-whats-holding-you-back-from-being.1366469 https://theredarchive.com/post/1366469

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