The Difference Between Mastering Pickup & Actually Getting Laid

Yes, you’ve read that title correctly. There’s a massive difference between learning to be a top pickup artist and learning to meet and actually bed high quality women on a regular basis. That’s the secret that many of the best guys already know that you probably haven’t realized, and it couldn’t be truer.

Let me tell you a story.

I recently spent a couple nights out with one of the most “elite” guys in the game (someone that you’re probably familiar with) and his three assistants. Each of these guys deeply embodied all the habits that you, as a pickup artist, aspire to learn. They mass approached and self-amused with cocky/clever openers and lines, merged sets, plowed against “bitch shields” - on and on and on in an effort to either pull or get blown out trying.

… And none of them ever pulled or even got close. Not even once.

My strategy, however, was completely different. Instead of mass approaching, I spent most of my time interacting with women I considered dime pieces. Instead of merging girls to get out of bad sets, I immediately excused myself from interactions with lame girls to avoid wasting another unnecessary second with them. Instead of using cocky or clever self-amused lines, I focused on having a fun, relatable time and getting the girls out of the club as soon as possible. And my results were completely different.

Within only a couple of hours I already had four separate girls that were down to come home with me after only 10-15 min of meeting. Unfortunately, I couldn’t overcome the logistical situations for three of them (didn’t have good wings for the friends), and only ended up pulling one of them.

… I returned an hour later after closing the girl, and guess what? The master pickup artists were still mass approaching and “burning their sets to the ground.”

To paraphrase a book I once read: sex is of the biggest motivators for us men to improve our lives. We buy luxury homes and cars, wear fancy clothing, get jacked at the gym, and take up dance classes three times a week across town all in the name of sex. You know it’s true, and yet how many guys do you think take the direct route and actually approach and hit on more girls? You’d probably agree that not many guys do, and I think you’d be right. Except, the community also seems to use an indirect approach to sleeping with women. And as the great Anthony Robbins says, “Success is 20% practice and 80% strategy.”

Most of the pickup advice leads you to taking the most complicated and indirect route to sleeping with a woman you like. Instead of teaching you to spend your interactions baby stepping the girl closer to sex, you’re taught to behave in outrageous ways, using cheesy openers and lame lines, and tell girls to get on their knees and beg for your attention, with the promise of sex at the end.

In fact, people are so brainwashed into thinking that these tricks are so necessary that one of the assistants actually came up and told me I wasn’t merging enough sets… What the flying fuck do I need to merge a set for if I’m repeatedly pulling hot girls that I like through the exit? I guess sex must not count if you didn’t do enough push pulls or merge enough girls.

Basketball is a great analogy for this because there are tons of fancy moves that you can do. You can dribble between your legs, take turnaround jump shots and alley-oops, etc., and each of these tricks can be incredibly helpful if applied at the right time. But, that doesn’t mean that you need to apply all the moves in each game to win, and it also doesn’t mean that the game is about performing fancy tricks instead of scoring points. Imagine how ridiculous it would be if LeBron James won the championship game and scored the most points, but still lost the MVP award for not dribbling enough between his legs. It’s also important to keep in mind that applying those fancy tricks at the wrong time can actually make the player way less effective, and the same idea applies to game since it would be unnecessary risk that can cost you the interaction.

That being said, if you’re applying all the mainstream advice and still not getting results after a while, it doesn’t mean that you need to go on another 30 day challenge, it means you need a NEW strategy because the one you have is flawed. You are either doing too much or not enough. Point blank. End of story.

… And that’s the whole point of this article. You have to decide whether you want to spend your time out meeting women trying to be a pickup artist or whether you want to get laid. If you decide that you want the former, feel free to message me and I can list a string of instructors that are amazing at the flashy techniques to become the ultimate PUA master.

If you decide the latter, you’re going to have to give up the pickup artist crap, and all the silly-assed, wheel spinning behaviors that come with it. You’re going to need to unlearn and cut out a large amount of the bullshit habits that you spent so much time learning how to do. Yes, that means saying goodbye to your super cool “spinning tornado” opener and calling girls “dogs,” sorry.

I will get way more in depth on the steps to consistently convert women you’re attracted to into romantic relationships in many of the upcoming posts, but the process in a nutshell is:

1. Have your logistics handled. If your logistical situation is poor, you’re going to have a very hard time bringing women home.
2. Be bold and dominant. If you come off like a little bitch, that’s how you’ll be treated.
3. Calibrations and patience. If at any point the girl is not ready to take the next step, back off, keep building the vibe, and try again soon.
4. Be relatable. If the girl can’t relate to you, you’re going to have a very difficult time getting her home and putting your dick inside her.
5. Create a sexual dynamic. She needs to see you as a sexual option if she’s ever go home and sleep with you.
6. Seed the pull. She won’t know if she’s welcome to come over if you never invite her.
7. Screen for logistics. You have to learn her logistical information to know whether or not she can come home with you.
8. Lead her home. This one is pretty self-explanatory.
9. Set the date. If she cannot come home with you right then, get her number and set the date right then.

The general rule is efficiency, meaning if you can eliminate something and get the same result, get rid of it. You don’t want anything superfluous or unnecessary. The steps above are not necessarily in the order of execution, but rather the most distilled guidelines to follow. Enjoy.

EDIT: People were interested in learning more about the value of logistics. Here's another post that I shared on r/seduction

I also welcome you to check out the other content I posted on my facebook page where I have several text examples for sexting, girls coming straight to my home, tinder conversations, field reports, etc.