i don't know what to say exactly or how.
I'll make it as short as possible .
I'm a in my late 30s and have been married for quite a long time. i have 2 boys and i love them so much. At home we don't have any problems or drama, especially in front of the kids. i encourage them to always listen and respect their mother and take care of her.
My wife and i go though good periods and bad ones. overall we might not see eye to eye on a few matters, but we have never disrespected each other or tried to hurt each other. She does what she can for me, and i provide whatever i can for her. We both have a great relationship with each other family, i mean an excellent one.
only one thing i had the courage to say after an argument, which is I'm not happy or comfortable in the relationship. There is absolutely nothing wrong with her, i just don't love her, i avoid sitting with her, travel with her ..etc. even sharing bed is more of a job rather than something i long for. i don't hate her, my love to her is out of respect and appreciation as a person. i have been trying for years to go to different experts and took a few therapies, my goal was "i want to lover" i couldn't. i just really really couldn't, as if there is a massive wall between us.
until a few weeks ago i was telling myself that I'll just continue and it is what it is, i don't need to be happy as long as my family is. But i told her what i feel, and what kills me more is that she said she understand and thanked me for telling her, and that she kinda felt it. She said that i was really nice and she loved me so much. We agreed that we'll revist the matter in a couple of weeks due to unrelated circumstances, but she knows that separation is the likely outcome.
part of me felt a huge weight lifted, and part of me worried and scared. i don't know how my kids will feel, and how life will go on. I'm also very sorry that i wasted her time this long.
divorced men, did you get these feelings? were you happier later? any regrets ?
note: there are no issues with money, legal stuff, custody ..etc.
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