I feel... Lost. (Long)

VigilantRedRooster · 2020-04-29T01:32:18+00:00

Personal questions belong in AskTRP

twy3440 · 2020-04-28T19:54:17+00:00

You're 22 years old and you have an income from the Internet? You're doing really well. Congrats. You should be celebrating your life not wallowing in misery. Yes, get in counseling. You say you know how to act with girls but instead act so pussy. Why? Why don't you pretend you're acting in a movie the next time you're with girls? And your role is to be red pill?

This is a pretty common behavioral technique BTW, kind of "fake it till you make it." Act as if you're playing a part and pretty soon you become the part.

And I like reading the stoic philosophers especially Marcus Arelius. This one saying is incredibly helpful IMHO.

“If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment.”

― Marcus Aurelius, Meditations

TootsOnTheRuns · 2020-04-28T19:39:22+00:00

If you are smoking weed, it interferes with your sleep. You also won't have dreams when you use it.

ElegantCyclist · 2020-04-28T20:05:19+00:00

Get in the gym and get jacked.
Delete Instagram. Social media is for chicks and cucks.
Quit weed.
Read Stoic philosophy. Start with the Meditations and then move to Ryan Holiday's books.
Learn something useful. Doesn't matter what it is. Programming. Bike repair. Stop wallowing in yourself. There is no "guidance." There is only do. Go do.

BeneathTheSassafras · 2020-04-28T19:51:10+00:00

I'll offer you some perspective: she was one female out of 4 billion on this planet - how things went with her is not any kind of barometer for how you're life, or where it will go. Beat that pedastal into dust with a sledge hammer Nothing goes good when you put them there.
Hit the gym harder. Lay off the weed. Study STEM, seek better paying employment, and seriously man, love yourself, no one's going to do that for you.

In the time it took you to write this post, you could have cranked out some reps, or cooked yourself a great meal, or learned something new.
Improve your clothing. Select some slacks or a nice shirt you want to aquire by next week, or month. Find A new cologne (read reviews, use sparingly)
You could literally throw a handful of darts at a board and find several tangible ways. What you wrote up above tells me two things. Youre unhappy, and unfocused. And that's okay. Happiness isn't a static state experience, or a destination. I'll tell you hwut though, when I've seen men who are focused and intentional in their life and direction experience drama and unhappiness, in general, the crest and trough of their happiness waves are markedly at a higher elevation than less focused unhappy people. And theirs nothing inherently wrong with weed (aside from accumulated lung damage) but seriously, the biggest risk of it isn't that something will happen, but over time, will be okay with nothing happening .
I have enjoyed from time to time; but there's nothing sadder than a 50 year old scrounging coins together for rolling papers.
Find your focus. Find your mission statement. Or just focus on short terms, health, money, appearance, daygame. It will get better if you show up and be present to your life, with intentionality. Get at it!

Sumsar01 · 2020-04-28T19:47:27+00:00

Stop smoking weed, it for losers. Things will hurt I still miss my ex from 4 years ago sometimes (Usually just need sleep or food). You need to build self worth. This is best done in the gym. Greatness is build one step at a time and takes a long time. 22 is still very young.

rdaneeloliv4w · 2020-04-28T19:41:37+00:00

Everyone feels those negative feelings sometimes, but only having 3 or 4 good days a year without the anxiety you've described is not normal.

If you are eating right, sleeping well, and exercising regularly you should see a doctor. If you are not doing those things start now.

Stupyyy · 2020-04-28T20:48:24+00:00

You must be young, your biggest mistake is putting the main focus in your life on girls when it should be on yourself. You will enjoy life better when you are in your 30's. The 20's are just a confusion and wondering without any guidance if you don't take control of your life at all.

dractepes · 2020-04-28T19:46:02+00:00

Try therapy and antidepressants. I just slept with a married Christian Church girl who is super hot and I used to almost pass out at the idea of talking to girls. Also the books 'Models' and 'The Domination Principle' both helped a shitload. Nothing you read here or anywhere else is the one truth for every situation. Just take a bunch in, and then stop taking everything so seriously. You put too much pressure on yourself and TRUUUUST me there will be so many girls who make you wonder why you even gave a shit about the girl you're hung up on. Just stop putting them on a pedestal. Have high standards. Respect yourself enough to enforce them.

TLDR: Get professional help for depression and stop taking life so seriously. That is the most unattractive thing you can do.

bobbzombie · 2020-04-28T19:46:39+00:00

I often lose my way and feel lost. What helps me find direction again is goal setting. You need to decide what you want and look where you are now. From these two things you can identify the steps that you need to take and that will give you direction.

555WeWolf · 2020-04-28T19:56:56+00:00

This is the question i have been searching ever since i found out about TRP myself.

Its really hard to describe and its weird. You not only have the material, you also have the knowledge, yet you don't do anything. You feel to much anxiety when you actually try to do something etc. actually do and approach, and the last thing you yourself want to hear is "you just need to do it". Yeah its simple, you know its simple, i know its simple, the world knows its simple. Yet when the thought of actually engaging comes up the anxiety is to strong. And what sometimes makes it worse is that you look at your life, your going to the gym, eating right, hustling, socializing... But it somehow just wont click.

All i have to say to you OP is that you are far from the only one who feels, as you said, lost. And i believe its more common than people think, so i guess we'll just have to look for the answer because i for sure am not going to just sit and let the years pass. Looking at it now at this point i don't know if i will actually achieve and live my best times but i know that i would rather spend the time fighting for them than doing nothing.

AceMav21 · 2020-04-28T20:49:56+00:00

Well your 22. So definitely don’t knock up a 35 year old married woman with 7 kids. Cause a divorce and then support her 7 kids. And 2 more of your own for the next 10 years and have nothing to show for it but a home foreclosure and shit credit. That what my “Step Dad did”. King Simp. Is his name.

Shaman6624 · 2020-04-28T21:14:20+00:00

I see a lot of what I've been through in what you're writing and I can say that the error in your mindset is already apparent in your first paragraph. " I know its wrong, yet I cant fight it at all. "

You shouldn't try to "fight" such things. You're creating an anxiety loop: " Oh no I shouldn't feel like this" Instead what you should do is "run towards" the feelings that you don't want. Believe it or not every little thought and emotion or even abstract mindfarts that float by is all a part of you and all waiting to be transformed to suit your purpose. At the base of those emotions is always a good thing. Why do you feel regret? Because you want to have her. Why do you feel anxious when approaching girls? Because you have a feeling of self preservation and don't have succes under your belt. All those things are good. Stop demonizing all those parts of yourself. Instead approach them. And just being present with those feelings will transform them. It's not math it's not rocket science just feel the feelings and expose them to your will. That's all they will fix themselves.

Also I recommend: DARE the new way to end anxiety. It's a book that has a lot of similarities to the ACT therapy used with anxiety and it's helped me.

Furthermore when you start applying techniques you won't notice instant succes. Maybe there will be a glimmer of hope and then the next morning you'll feel like you're at baseline again. Thats because these are worn in thought patterns so it will take a long time. You might consider using an SSRI for a year like zoloft to speed up the process and increase the neuroplasticity.

thiskindofflair · 2020-04-28T20:12:06+00:00

I know that girl I fell for like no other before ghosted me because I was a pussy and didnt make a move in time, I know she doesnt give a flying shit about me now with her boyfriend. Its been a year. Yet a picture of her pops up in my IG and instantly my heart races and regret appears. I know its wrong, yet I cant fight it at all. I get anxious.

I would avoid using instagram at all. I don't use it. My life is fine. The benefits of that platform are way overblown. The negative things you bring into your life are way underestimated (which include directing your attention in completely useless directions).

Simple - cut out instagram.

I know to get girls you need to approach them. Yet I dont do it. I suffer because of it, yet I still dont do it.

Stop approaching women. Approach people. Be friendly. Communicate with people. Make jokes with them. 90 year olds, 10 year olds. Men / women. Kids / adults. Occasionally in the process of being social very everyone, you will be social with a woman you are attracted to. Stop approaching women - start approaching people every day. Make a habit of it.

I know how to get girls. I've read books, i've seen my friends first hand apply TRP without knowing TRP and it working. I saw it in my own experience. Yet, I dont apply what I learned. Its like... I want to suffer. If im not suffering, I have anxiety because I am so used to suffering that when its not there I want to go back to suffering because its a place I am familiar with.

This is feminine and circular complaining. Identify what you want and go pursue it. Stop your roundabout chatter.

I act so pussy with girls, yet I drift, I love adrenaline rushes like scaling buildings, smoking weed, I love partying, I have many friends, yet with girls I close myself off.

With the TRP slap I managed to be able to make friends, socialize normally. Yet, in my own head the anxiety and fear of those horrible childhood years are still there. They wont leave me alone. As soon as I try to leave this place of suffering, of not taking action, I get panic, anxious, stressed, my fight or flight response activates and I must return to suffering. Only when a girl ghosts me, or tells me to fuck off is when I feel safe. Because I know what this leads to. It leads to me going home and staying in own little cube.

I can tell you like to introspectively analyze yourself.

Here's a tip... STOP. Stop constantly thinking about yourself and your actions and you you you.

Think about other people. When you socialize, instead of thinking about what girl you're getting or who you're talking to or if you anxious or how you look or blah blah blah...

you're literally thinking about yourself, you're masturbating to yourself.

Start thinking about others. Start thinking how to make other people have fun, how to encourage other people, how you can be someone's friend or make them smile or build energy. Stop thinking about yourself constantly and think about other people.

Of course you're anxious and depressed or whatever... you only think about yourself. No where in this entire monologue did you mention how other people feel or what other people want. You're lost in self-centered land and finding out it sucks.

Its weird. At this point im just riding the waves. The rare times I feel ok with myself are the next 30 minutes after a perfect gym routine is done, or after smoking weed and having awesome conversations with my closest friends and then going home to chill alone watching youtube on my bed. Its the two only times where I seem in touch with my own head and understand the world. But after I go to sleep and wake up again, Its all over. I've recently taken a small addictive made out of a root because of my fucked up sleep scheduled due to quarantine that my doc told me to take and after 8 years I am finally dreaming again. Everytime I take this pills I dream again. My doc says its because im finally sleeping relax and go to deep sleep, well then are you saying I stress so much about being perfect that im actually not sleeping? I checked my hormones, blood tests everything and the only thing I have slightly low is vitamin D, the rest is perfectly fine. T levels, everything. I went to the best docs I could get and they told me all was fine.

Then, its all in my head. I kinda knew that already, yet I cant seem to fight it. TRP gave me hope when I felt I was lower than even the dirt on the ground. I can go outside and do regular day shit because of TRP. Yet, I was put here on this fucking earth to achieve what I can do best and im going to do everything I fucking can to reach my death bed feeling like I conquered everything I wanted or at least tried my best. And right now I dont feel that way and im having difficulty doing what I want to do and what I know I should do.

Trp gave me hope already and guided my life, can anyone give me some guidance on this?

Sure - I can give you guidance. You're overly focused on yourself. TRP can teach you how to be something that women want, how to interact with them, how to get them to have sex with you. Sure, it can teach you all that - but you will still end up with all the same problems you have.

I would recommend that you realize God's Kingdom is here - go read about Jesus. Read the book of Matthew in the Bible. Everything is in your head. You're learning to live and think about yourself constantly and to make sure you've achieved everything for yourself, get more money or women for yourself. You will not end up happy with this path. The right path is to be a giver. Love other people. Be kind to other people. Go read Jesus story. He didn't live for himself but for others.

Run_Che · 2020-04-28T20:26:34+00:00

Power of Now - eckhart tolle

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empatheticapathetic · 2020-04-28T19:58:17+00:00

Yeah i'm kinda like this. Breaking the rut helps sometimes, helps you refresh everything you are and where you stand and you can reassess what your next step is and figure out everything you need to do to get there (in terms of discipline but also finding your motivation).

It's easy to do the simple regular shit like gym and work because these are simple staples that you need to do regardless of how you feel; you use discipline. But the motivation to go after girls needs to be looked at and refined until you are able to use it to progress in this area of your life.

anonymous8452 · 2020-04-28T20:11:53+00:00

Keep working on fixing your shit while you also...

Find and talk to women you are attracted to, and
Next them if: you find something about them turning you off or if they behave badly or in a way you don't find acceptable/useful (ghosting is). Have clear boundaries. Next them.
Having friends without having a GF isn't that bad. I used to have friends and no GF, now I have a fiance and few "friends", both have pros and cons. I was fine in both situations. You'll be fine with one or the other.
Working out will help your mental health (do cardio and lift weights). It will limit or stop your stress. Yes you read that right.
A better diet is important: try to stop eating sugar, dairy and wheat. Replace sugar with healthy fat (avoid fried and/or processed shit) to feel full. No fucking soy milk, but almond, oat, rice or coconut milk are fine.
F***** stop drinking that alcohol poison. Do weed only as you would do a medicine: take little when you feel bad. Exception to that rule is when you are partying (it's gonna look weird if you aren't drinking and smoking any...) but use with moderation: you only want to feel good/high, not fuck your brain out.
Next them.

Idontwannabefamous · 2020-04-28T20:34:08+00:00

Escitalopram 10mg daily. I strongly suspect it would help.

What’s your relationship with your mother like? Any unconscious trauma? Sounds like women are kryptonite for you and it’s starting to impact you adversely in other arenas of life. I don’t know what’s true for you but it’s important to ask some deep questions to really gain insight and change. I’m not just talking like an asshole. I had similar issues and I’m much older. Only recently was I able to confront the horrible unconscious trauma that was destroying my psyche. I always wondered what was wrong with me. Girls I was crazy about. Naked in my bed, soaking wet. This girl I fell in love with in my car, crazy energy and I didn’t kiss her. A girl saying to me “hey where am I going to sleep (twice)”. I always convinced myself I’m not good with girls and I’m ugly and what not. I had more than enough opportunities. My belief system is fucked up. Examine your own. A long time ago this kind, selfless mystic vibe became essential to my personality. And redpill says it excellently. YOU are first. Be selfish! Take what’s in front of you, don’t hesitate (the guy who hesitated plenty of times). Selflessness has its limits. Don’t just hook up with girls you don’t care about because you don’t give a shit about the outcome. Don’t give a shit about the outcome with a beautiful girl you dig. Because.. whatever she’s probably not all that anyways. You’re pedestalizing.. It’s tough.. I’m still living and transforming myself. But I know you can do it. Take care kid

RealMcGonzo · 2020-04-28T20:43:42+00:00

I know to get girls you need to approach them. Yet I dont do it. I suffer because of it, yet I still dont do it.

Approaching and getting nothing, no phone number, no smile, no laugh, not even an acknowledgement is not failure. Not approaching is failure. So start small. Not in clubs or other notorious pickup places. You're not out to get laid, all you want to do is have fun and get better. Maybe just smile. I almost always get a smile in return. Getting a smile from a cute chick is nice. Baby steps. Don't focus on getting laid tonight. Have fun and get a little better at the same time.

axiscontra · 2020-04-28T20:48:52+00:00

Didn't read. You were just venting but listen up bro. Let yourself suffer. When you are done you will be done with it. Keep doing what you're doing this is stoicism. When you are ready it will be yours. Sometimes you have to sit in a well and think. Stay off social media too delete the app (keep the profile tho update sporadically) its a waste of time. I never find my plates through social media

ISLAMR1GHTABOUTWOMEN · 2020-04-28T21:03:47+00:00

Seek meaning in your life. A goal that you are passionate about and want to work towards every day. Reaching this goal should mean more to you than women. Working towards your goal will improve your confidence and mood, allowing you to apply what you’ve learned from TRP

“To live is to suffer, to survive is to find meaning in the suffering”

funnymonkeyice · 2020-04-28T21:09:20+00:00

Strange coincidence I was going through the exact phase of my life just now like our stories are so fucking similar bro that you can't believe it ,I also did the same thing like what you did with a girl who may or may not have liked me but I gave my word to my friend as I thought poor guy couldn't get any action, I gave my word not to make a move at her as I was already Redpilled and it was easy for me to get a girl but man, I was wrong like she affected me in such a way it was completely out of the blue that I slowly let the poison bluepill come back to me, I started hating myself not realizing at that moment what went wrong but slowly gave up gym had quit cigarettes for two years and smoked weed again .My hate for both them slowly started getting toxic and it affected my life as it swirl down as I stopped reading stopped focusing on life ,everything became a punishment to make matters worse she started coming in my dreams and to my bad luck I see crystal clear dreams like real then quarantine happened it gave me an opportunity to reflect on myself and man I had to release some toxic ,people had left me as they could feel the toxic in me you know what else I realized it was messed up of me to think that way as I forgot everything I had learned and i just needed an excuse to return back to being bluepill or getting back to my old self before Redpilled days but you know what all this things were all happening in my head I mean, i just wanted an excuse to just fuck it up with my life and she was the perfect person to blame . When I realized that I changed my thought process I told myself how much I loved lifting weights how much I loved being active and how easy it was for me to get girls before her and how much I love working towards my goals after that I said thank you to God and asked him to bless her and my friend hope they stay together forever as they actually taught me a valuable lesson I will get anyone I want if everything fails look in the mirror and with a loud as fuck voice say you one handsome motherfucker and say all the awesome things about you cause you can't control others mind but you can control yours so the choice is yours handsome motherfucker and listen to Hopsin I'll mind 5 really helps

Obediah_Stane · 2020-04-28T22:01:06+00:00

Bro I was 21 when I lost my virginity. It doesn't matter when you start the path only that you do start.

kabuto_mushi · 2020-04-28T22:11:27+00:00

> I know im making progress but im 22 and still a virgin, my best times are going away.

Hahahhahahahh oh man. Sometimes I'm reminded of the average age around here.

I'm sorry kid, but in no way are "your best times" before 25. Educate yourself and get a mission. Comon'.

Mlo-H · 2020-04-28T22:51:20+00:00

Craving adrenaline
Poor sleep
Rejection sensitivity
Emotional dysregulation (mood swings)
Anxiety
Perfectionism
Excessive rumiination/overthinking

Do yourself a favor and get tested for ADHD before ever considering taking an SSRI. I know that advice was meant well, but it's one of the last things you need if my hunch is correct. That shit turned me into a vegetable for 3 years.

MilkMoney111 · 2020-04-28T23:01:04+00:00

You don’t wanna be perfect. It’s too much of a fucking stress to live like that. Respect yourself to stay healthy and maintain drive but give some damn leeway to just be you, as imperfect as that is.

Look man, this feeling doesn’t go away with or without women. All it does when you start getting women is show you that you don’t need them anyways. You’re back at being alone again. And somewhere along the way we’re told that’s somehow wrong. To be alone. Well, you have thousands of years of ancestors that lived nomadically, impregnated a bitch or two along the way, and got too old and died alone in the woods eaten by a leopard or some shit. It’s not glorious, but it’s life. You gotta live for it right now and stop having expectations of it.

Take a break from TRP if you have to. Just bc you’re not fucking doesn’t mean you’re not living.

Part of becoming your own man is making your own life. Deciding your own rules. Living it how YOU see fit. Forming your own beliefs. That’s your frame, unique to you, and that’s all that matters. If you don’t feel like gaming women... don’t! Your happiness is paramount. There seems to be a disconnect here bc you think you must be fucking women to be complete or something but you don’t have an urge to. That’s fine. You’re young you have time to figure it out. You may surprise yourself and get to the point where you fuck so many that it leaves you more hollow. Because: it. Doesn’t. Fucking. Matter.

Plan your life out accomplish all your goals and the emptiness is still there. Because it’s an internal thing, not external. It’s all about the journey anyways, not the finish line. Fall in love with the journey. Go for a walk, smoke some weed, and just look at a tree and think “man nature is so fucking beautiful, I’m so lucky to be here right now experiencing this planet.”

I was where you’re at man, and I’ve got that spot several times in my life. But the older I get the more I realize it’s not something outside of me that’s going to solve things. It’s gotta be me and accepting and loving myself fully. Not an excuse to be a bum, that’s part of self respect. But an excuse to not be perfect. Who wants that anyways?

MilkMoney111 · 2020-04-28T23:02:30+00:00

You don’t wanna be perfect. It’s too much of a fucking stress to live like that. Respect yourself to stay healthy and maintain drive but give some damn leeway to just be you, as imperfect as that is.

Look man, this feeling doesn’t go away with or without women. All it does when you start getting women is show you that you don’t need them anyways. You’re back at being alone again. And somewhere along the way we’re told that’s somehow wrong. To be alone. Well, you have thousands of years of ancestors that lived nomadically, impregnated a bitch or two along the way, and got too old and died alone in the woods eaten by a leopard or some shit. It’s not glorious, but it’s life. You gotta live for it right now and stop having expectations of it.

Take a break from TRP if you have to. Just bc you’re not fucking doesn’t mean you’re not living.

Part of becoming your own man is making your own life. Deciding your own rules. Living it how YOU see fit. Forming your own beliefs. That’s your frame, unique to you, and that’s all that matters. If you don’t feel like gaming women... don’t! Your happiness is paramount. There seems to be a disconnect here bc you think you must be fucking women to be complete or something but you don’t have an urge to. That’s fine. You’re young you have time to figure it out. You may surprise yourself and get to the point where you fuck so many that it leaves you more hollow. Because: it. Doesn’t. Fucking. Matter.

Plan your life out accomplish all your goals and the emptiness is still there. Because it’s an internal thing, not external. It’s all about the journey anyways, not the finish line. Fall in love with the journey. Go for a walk, smoke some weed, and just look at a tree and think “man nature is so fucking beautiful, I’m so lucky to be here right now experiencing this planet.”

I was where you’re at man, and I’ve got that spot several times in my life. But the older I get the more I realize it’s not something outside of me that’s going to solve things. It’s gotta be me and accepting and loving myself fully. Not an excuse to be a bum, that’s part of self respect. But an excuse to not be perfect. Who wants that anyways?

realperson67982 · 2020-04-28T23:08:57+00:00

This may not be the most redpill response as I mostly lurk here, but I had to say something. Mods remove if you want.

I’ve been to deep dark depression, I’ve felt similar to the way you did for years. Eerily similar issues. I’ve been there and I’ve been crawling out for the past 3 years at 25. Could relate to most of it except your particular sort of childhood trauma.

I used to have everything, EVERYTHING, except girls. And close friends. And then I’d drive myself crazy and get depressed and lose it every six months because perfect wasn’t enough. Finally I got totally sober and had a come apart after a couple weeks. Perfection and people pleasing had held me back my entire life from everything I wanted.

What’s helped me more than anything, through years of fighting off depression only for it to come back and fight it off again: do one small thing every day. For me it was meditation. And slowly, slowly, in a non linear way, you gain progress. This is deep psychological shit you’re dealing with and it could take a while.

But self awareness is a huge start.

I’m stuck in this constant loop of: 'I will only take action when im perfect. Perfection is impossible.’

Perfect. This is amazing. You’ve described it. As much as we want to change everything in a day, get flip the table mad and just do it, it’s often not sustainable. If you’re trying to change it and it’s not working, just observe your patterns, very closely, without judgement. With curiousity. This trains your brain to internalize that when I do this I don’t feel good. and you will probably get some info as to why you do it. Meditation is invaluable training for this. I started with just 1 minute a day.

For you? I recommend this. Put a calendar in your room. Every day do one thing imperfect. However small you can manage, but you have to push yourself just a little. Stay on that edge of what you don’t quite want to do. Mark your calendar every day if you do it or you don’t.

The ancient greeks considered perfectionism an insult to the gods. They would intentionally leave a chip in their stonework on principle. Do this.

Here’s another thing that helped me, an exercise from the book No More Mr Nice Guy (highly recommend. It’s part of what triggered the rage at my life and helped me get better): pick one thing you’re a perfectionist about. Ex: one guy was meticulous with his car, I used to obsessively check my hair in the mirror, blow-dry and gel it in the mornings. Pick your thing and don’t touch it for 30 days. Me- I started getting tons of compliments on my naturally curly hair and manly looking scruff and haven’t cut it or messed with it since. Barely shaved either. The car guy, had a similar realization.

Over time, I’ve made immense progress. I’m seeing a girl I genuinely like lately. I’ve been approaching to the point rejections literally don’t phase me. I had sex with a handful of girls, a couple 9’s and one that’s my particular 10. (I too was a 22 year old virgin, all too aware of where that put me percentage-wise). I still challenge myself daily to do something that gets me out of these perfectionistic habits that have ruled my life. The current struggle is bedtime, it’s like I can’t go to bed until I’ve perfected the day. Read the perfect article, chapter, watched the perfect tv show to reward myself, gotten a snack and on and on. It takes just doing it. It takes taking total responsibility for your actions. It also takes understanding that your brain is a bundle of habits that took a lifetime to change and Rome wasn’t built in a day. One change a day is how you train your brain. They create pathways in your brain, and the interest compounds. Gratitude for what you did (marking your calendar) creates even more compound brain interest. See the book The Upward Spiral. Take the just change, just do advice in this sub. But understand that if you’re like me “just do” might be a years long battle, a years long learning curve.

Another thing to just do: it sounds like you have a lot of childhood trauma that’s fucking with you. In a very serious way. Let me stress this— what you’re going through, even though it’s just in your head, even though no one can see it— it’s serious. This is not normal and it’s not good. You can get through this. You can live much better. These patterns aren’t anything special. Consider them just another task in life, something to get past, onto the next. You can resolve your trauma. That’s one of the deepest things you can do. Just go to therapy and just throw it all out there. Just go to a 10 day silent meditation retreat and let it drive you crazy until you break or until you break it. Just sit in your room and trip balls in silent darkness until you meet god or hell and come back with a new perspective. All of these have helped me immensely. The patterns and insecurities in my life that I thought would never be solved— solved. I used to desperately need a girl or lots of sex to complete me and feel incredibly lonely and insufficient at never having dated. I used to feel inferior and terrified at the thought of dating— this crippling mixture of inferiority, jealousy to the men that had, resentment for women, suicidal at having missed the one thing I always wanted. The One thing. It seemed light years away. And I couldn’t live without it.

Now, with lots of meditation, with putting myself first in my life, with loving myself, being compassionate to myself, listening to myself, not being afraid to make others upset by being authentic, I feel content. I for the first time in my life don’t feel a need for sex. Or to date. It’s not that depressed, no desire for it— no the desire is there. I just know fulfillment is on me. And I’m confident it’s coming, it’s rolling down a mountain towards me, a massive snowball of love and sex and affection from the most beautiful women imaginable.

So, yea. It’s doable. Just do it. Understand it takes time. Reaching out was a huge step. That’s one of the most important things on the journey.

Overall, trust yourself. Take what resonates leave what doesn’t. Good luck.

KnightBlue2 · 2020-04-28T20:17:38+00:00

Stop smoking weed, it's a depressant and will increase your anxiety.

seattle-alpha-male · 2020-04-28T20:35:12+00:00

Great comments from many people here. Focus on you and your mission to achieve success.

molooooo · 2020-04-28T20:01:58+00:00

You seem like a peculiar fella. For people like you and me the best thing is to trust in GOD. He sees what happens and gives according to your merit. For people like you it is not worth chasing girls, you will never catch them because GOD will not allow it. Even if you finally meet a girl you are interested in you will only talk about this and that until you feel like going home and suffer some more. Suffering is in fact the way of the righteous. Seek the holy LORD´s inspiration to live life to the fullest! Peace!

Title	I feel... Lost. (Long)
Author	PotatoWatt
Upvotes	51
Comments	74
Date	April 28, 2020 7:31 PM UTC (6 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/TheRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/TheRedPill/comments/g9ttek/i_feel_lost_long/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/TheRedPill/i-feel-lost-long.657678 https://theredarchive.com/post/657678

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“If you are distressed by anything external, the pain is not due to the thing itself, but to your estimate of it; and this you have the power to revoke at any moment.”

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