Love or understand

DonChilliCheese · 2020-09-12T16:36:40+00:00

It's based on the same misconception that nearly the whole Redpill cult is built around, that there are characteristics that women have in common because of their gender. This is not true at all and the main point which made me realise that is, that I met guys who were really shitty people and women who were decent, its way to unreliable to just judge because of gender, there are shitty persons and good persons everywhere, also I don't believe women hate women, they like / dislike each other just like men do

unlivedbread · 2020-09-12T21:00:01+00:00

That's a Freudian slip

you cannot love something you are simultaneously threatened by (with the obvious exclusion of something like a fathers discipline etc...)

if these people cannot love women because they "understand" them then they must feel threatened by them.

This is the whole redpill conundrum

nebthefool · 2020-09-12T16:58:21+00:00

Any statement that decides to generalize a group based on semi arbitrary characteristics is fucking stupid. You can say that women have higher statistical tendencies to be x or y but that doesn't mean shit on an individual basis. Even if you were to assume that the majority of women share the traits red pill is convinced they all have, it wouldn't mean shit because the goal isn't to love all women it's to love one woman and for her to love me back.

Besides, humanity as a whole has all the despicable traits RP hates women for and then some. But I love all of them. I draw a line in the sand round all of humanity and say "every one of these fuckers deserves love and support and to be able to grow to their full potential and if I could I would make it so".

Generally the women who hate all other women are just the same as anyone who hates a group for their shared arbitrary characteristic, bigoted shitheads. That is a group of individuals that doesn't belong to any subset of humanity, you can find them everywhere.

atman714 · 2020-09-12T20:38:32+00:00

The quote itself doesn't make sense. What, can you not love your mother? Are you supposed to turn a cold shoulder to her and stop taking care of her if she needs help? Can you not love your sister? And if they say, "this is speaking of romantic love," no, it isn't, hence the "women understand women and hate each other." Anyone who takes this quote to its logical extreme and implications would then have to hate their own female family members too, which seems like a horribly toxic way to live.

Fuzzy-Scene · 2020-09-12T21:25:58+00:00

Flip the script. How would you feel if that statement was about men? Would you believe it? What points would you disagree with? Blanket statements like this only have a tiny element of truth in it. It's like saying "every Rainbow has blue in it" which is true but a rainbow also has other colours in it too and mixing the primary colours makes shades of other ones and so the statement no longer holds the absolute truth.

I always find it helpful to apply statements like this to another scenario so you're not focused on the outcome (confirmation bias). Red pill wants you to dislike women but is it beneficial to do so and does it help you? Does hating all women because a select few have hurt you the most sensible way to conduct your life?

2020-09-12T17:16:26+00:00

Just see them as being just as human as you and you can do both while if you dont see them as human you will keep getting confused about their mysteriousness while they do the same things as you.

DarkestTimeline24 · 2020-09-12T22:13:38+00:00

psssssst women are people

escapadablur · 2020-09-13T04:08:06+00:00

Why does understanding women preclude them from being loved? Is the implication that once you truly understand women, you disdain them and that love for a women can happen once the "truth" has been revealed? What a load of shit if that's what they are trying to say!

palacesofparagraphs · 2020-09-12T19:11:05+00:00

It's not true.

Women are not a monolith. We're not even necessarily more similar to one another than we are to men. Men and women are all just people, with individual personalities, faults and virtues, preferences, behaviors, and ways of looking at the world. Certainly there are things women have in common with each other, but those things make up just a part of our experiences as a whole. Don't try to "understand women," because you'll inevitably fail. Instead, try to understand individual women as you would try to understand any individual; by getting to know them. There are no secret plots and strategies. We're not mysterious others. We're just people.

Also, most women don't hate other women. That's a stereotype that comes from catty teenagers and people who never grow out of being catty teenagers, but they're in the minority. Most women love other women. Even most teenage girls figure out pretty quickly that other girls are cool, and life is better when you stick together.

Stargazer1919 · 2020-09-13T18:34:12+00:00

This is not consistent with Redpill logic I've seen before. They claim women are basically clueless and we don't even understand ourselves. How would we possibly understand each other but not our own selves? This makes no sense. If you see the term "hampstering" then this is what it is referring to.

So which is it? Are women clueless or completely aware? The answer is that this is just more bullshit hatred of women.

Straight-Science · 2020-09-13T04:14:42+00:00

How you approach this depends on what presuppositions you have about human nature. Your strong BPs are feminists and will say that men and women are only different in biology and socialization. Strong RPs believe men and women are intrinsically different and unknowable to one another. Both I think are extreme reactions and neither are absolutely true.

Men and women are both people. They’re both complex and have their own interests unique to themselves. Knowing how to deal with people in general means knowing how to deal with both sexes.

I personally believe the quote is, while funny, quite sexist and not really true.

I believe men and women cannot fully know each others experience because of their biology. I am a sex essentist (and no, I don’t mean gender—I mean sex.)

Comfortable_Intern57 · 2020-09-14T02:14:05+00:00

You can't love someone if you don't understand them. If you don't understand them, then you don't truly know them now do you? Take the time to get to know them, ask them questions about themselves, pay attention to their actions, etc.

I used to have issues with women too, until I learned to love myself. I am a woman too but I still felt we women were inferior to men in many ways. Unfortunately that was a product of my religious and societal upbringing. Once I shed that belief, I looked at women differently. I could appreciate everything about them, their intelligence, their beauty, their kindness, all without feeling like it was a competition.

See them as equals and you will truly understand them.

Title	Love or understand
Author	RoseAvara
Upvotes	13
Comments	37
Date	September 12, 2020 4:26 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/irfmx9/love_or_understand/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/love-or-understand.214142 https://theredarchive.com/post/214142

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