Ladies, this pisses men off.

throwawayrarst · 2010-10-26T00:32:14+00:00

So, you want to do something this weekend?

That's pretty weak. You're giving her the option of saying no. I prefer "what do your plans look like this weekend?"

her: "blah blah not much Saturday afternoon"

you: "cool, I'm doing *some thing interesting*, but you can come along"

So you want to grab some dinner this weekend?

Dinner? Lame. Go do something fun. Every chump takes her out for dinner.

Her (txt msg): Hey, actually, can I get a rain check on dinner?

"I suppose, but it expires on Tuesday."

Me: Well, would you like me to come pick you up, watch a movie at my place?

Lame. You're setting yourself up for rejection. Instead "love to, but I'm but my friend invited me to her show". This message actually conveys a lot of different things about you:

You do, in fact, want to see her
You have friends who are competing for your time
You don't bail on people once you've made plans
You have female friends inviting you out

cheddarchexmix · 2010-10-25T23:32:25+00:00

Three bad flakes in a row, that is a pretty bad run considering you went on dates with them. How old are these girls (I'm guessing pretty young)? You are probably not building enough attraction, but your text game also needs some work.

If girls give you the flat "I'm busy" after a first date, with no opening to reschedule, that is girl-talk for "not interested". I usually just forget them if I get that.

"you want to [blah]?" as a text message is not something I recommend, it's pandering. I always text something like "come meet me at [blah] for drinks tomorrow at 8", seems to have markedly improved my response rate.

I especially don't like the non-specific "So, you want to do something this weekend?", it is giving her the power, and makes it sound like you would do anything with her at any time over the weekend. Girls don't like that.

Also I would never send the same question multiple times in a row after getting shot down (Girl 1). Try different tactics.

Finally, a small tip, but I generally try to get the girl to agree to a date / next date at the end of a pickup or date. If I just got her number, I tell her I'm going to text her and we're going to go out, and make her say "cool", "sounds good", etc. If it's the end of a date, and I want to see her again, I say "we should do this again soon" and she agrees. That may help lower your flake rate too. Good luck.

intjpua · 2010-10-25T23:12:49+00:00

Flakitude is in the nature of women. It is unavoidable. You must plan for it...and never be at her beck and call.

On "the roommates are all gone" thing, you fucked up. That was a shit test, and you failed.

Some tips:

Don't give a girl your weekend dates, until you've slept with her.
Don't give her so much notice. Try just texting her, midday on a Tuesday or something, "Hey I'm going bowling with friends at 8 tonight. Meet me there."
Never agree to see her on short notice unless she's coming to you, and there is sex strongly implied. You're a busy man, and her feminine fickleness is not your concern.

MBlume · 2010-10-26T04:34:28+00:00

I'm torn -- this post wound up full of useful information, but the attitude of the OP definitely deserves a downvote.

xGrill · 2010-10-25T22:46:52+00:00

If they flake on you, answer with the line, "How are you going to make it up to me?". You will seem less like plan B.

hhhhhhhha · 2010-10-26T00:44:42+00:00

WHAT IS GOING ON!? ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!?

You're not interesting/attractive enough to them.

Bitching about women not going out with you is like a fisherman complaining the fish won't bite his hook. Get better bait, fish in spots with more fish, work on your technique in reeling them in.

philosarapter · 2010-10-26T18:33:52+00:00

A few pointers:

Never ask a girl to do things on the weekend unless you already know the answer is going to be a "yes". Most girls have social lives and like to go out with their friends, you should too. If you want to get some one-on-one time, pick a Tuesday or Wednesday afternoon.

Don't be so needy always asking her to hang out. What you should be doing is going out with your group of people and invite her along. Always being at the beck and call of her whim is going to get you very frustrated. That said, lead into it. Don't ask her to hang out right away, establish some connection, get her in a good mood, find out something she's always wanted to do, and then casually mention you are doing that this weekend and could use someone to bring you sandwiches.

roxxe · 2010-10-26T07:42:49+00:00

enough with the dinners, go out and have one night stands

Mouthpiece · 2010-10-26T13:16:02+00:00

You did not build attraction.

tarlack · 2010-10-26T02:33:04+00:00

What are you doing on your first dates with the girls? Also try picking up the phone a calling, I never ask a girl out on a date via txt till at least the fourth date.

_Uatu_ · 2010-10-26T07:41:33+00:00

In my experience as a lady and friend to other ladies, the kind of women who do that tend to be the one's who don't feel physical attraction very strongly, so dating becomes this analytical game of trying to figure out what dude is the good one out of several. Not much you can do about that really.

glassuser · 2010-10-26T14:14:31+00:00

There's some good advice in this thread. But one thing seems to be missing. Why are just asking if they want to do something that weekend? That makes it look like (and them think) you have nothing to do and that you think they're critical to you having a good time. never let them think that - they're not critical for anything, they're accessories to your awesomeness.

The bottom line is that you need to present the deal as you doing something that's great and you're asking if they'd like to join. That is, have something to do, even if it's faked, and have the flexibility to change that plan as it benefits the outing.

GreatBigPig · 2010-10-26T15:21:47+00:00

You need to learn how to read women. The initial , "I can't" or perhaps more polite negative responses are their way of saying "never". Guys are more direct, but women would rather beat around the bush, instead of being honest. They are trying to avoid confrontation, or damage your feelings.

There are lots of girls out there. Work on the odds.

Hotwir3 · 2010-10-26T01:04:25+00:00

"Maybe you iz shootin' fuh birds wut is out a your league." -- Ali G

CamoBee · 2010-10-25T22:56:32+00:00

You should have told 2 if she wanted to hang out, schedule a date. Like for a Thursday, your weekends are busy.

whatalife · 2010-10-26T06:10:03+00:00

I've got to say... this is truely inspiring information.

2010-10-26T14:55:52+00:00

the common denominator is you.

i'm not being a dick, it's a mantra of mine^

Title	Ladies, this pisses men off.
Author	Hotwir3
Upvotes	38
Comments	62
Date	October 25, 2010 10:33 PM UTC (15 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/dwaz0/ladies_this_pisses_men_off/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/ladies-this-pisses-men-off.1312524 https://theredarchive.com/post/1312524

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