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Bluey-Dad1987 Archive

View 95 posts and 183 comments by Bluey-Dad1987 on TheRedPill subreddit and various other subreddits related to The Red Pill community.
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Upvotes Title Category Author Subreddit Date (UTC)
29

LawyersBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men30/05/25 03:12 AM
23

Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men27/04/25 08:46 AM
20

Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men31/05/25 01:17 AM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men13/09/25 01:39 AM
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CustodyBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men21/04/25 08:32 PM
17

CustodyBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men14/08/25 12:48 AM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men07/10/25 05:50 PM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men11/08/25 10:58 AM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men22/05/25 03:34 AM
9

CustodyBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men29/04/25 10:24 PM
8

Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men20/04/25 10:30 PM
8

Dealing with the Ex / STBXBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men24/03/25 03:17 PM
8

Getting StartedBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men28/04/25 03:31 AM
7

Getting StartedBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men09/04/25 08:41 PM
7

Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men03/09/25 09:08 AM
7

CustodyBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men28/06/25 11:33 PM
6

Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men24/09/25 01:58 AM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men04/07/25 12:06 AM
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LawyersBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men07/07/25 03:08 PM
6

Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men08/08/25 07:38 PM
6

Getting StartedBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men15/03/25 11:34 PM
6

Getting StartedBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men05/03/25 04:00 AM
6

Dealing with the Ex / STBXBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men24/04/25 07:11 PM
6

Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men06/08/25 12:24 PM
6

Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men20/08/25 12:19 PM
5

Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men20/04/25 01:01 PM
5

CustodyBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men15/04/25 03:27 PM
5

LawyersBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men18/06/25 10:44 PM
5

Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men02/07/25 10:04 AM
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CustodyBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men31/05/25 11:27 PM
5

Living SituationsBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men29/03/25 09:45 AM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men22/03/25 06:53 PM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men01/08/25 02:32 AM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men26/04/25 07:56 PM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men02/10/25 01:56 AM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men19/08/25 01:40 PM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men30/07/25 02:14 AM
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CustodyBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men17/08/25 02:18 AM
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CustodyBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men22/04/25 02:32 PM
3

Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men27/05/25 02:41 AM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men27/03/25 06:12 PM
3

CustodyBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men23/04/25 01:43 PM
3

CustodyBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men30/05/25 02:46 PM
3

Living SituationsBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men25/03/25 08:12 PM
3

Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men21/05/25 09:08 PM
3

Getting StartedBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men05/04/25 07:42 PM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men04/09/25 01:37 AM
3

CustodyBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men07/06/25 01:48 AM
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Getting StartedBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men16/04/25 10:02 AM
3

CustodyBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men02/07/25 11:43 AM
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CustodyBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men22/04/25 10:46 AM
3

CustodyBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men30/06/25 01:07 AM
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LawyersBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men10/06/25 10:07 AM
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Getting StartedBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men27/03/25 03:45 PM
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CustodyBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men25/06/25 02:23 AM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men09/04/25 11:49 PM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men28/06/25 12:42 AM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men13/04/25 01:47 AM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men09/03/25 07:36 PM
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CustodyBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men10/07/25 08:03 PM
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CustodyBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men27/05/25 02:58 PM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men08/08/25 03:35 PM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men15/05/25 08:42 PM
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CustodyBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men28/05/25 02:55 AM
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LawyersBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men15/04/25 11:51 PM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men23/06/25 01:49 PM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men12/04/25 01:12 AM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men06/08/25 10:38 PM
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CustodyBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men09/07/25 06:05 PM
1

Getting StartedBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men01/04/25 08:53 AM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men21/08/25 12:55 AM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men13/07/25 02:31 AM
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LawyersBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men30/06/25 04:09 PM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men16/07/25 11:22 AM
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CustodyBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men20/04/25 07:11 PM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men18/08/25 05:58 PM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men24/09/25 03:12 PM
1

Getting StartedBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men31/03/25 03:21 AM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men09/08/25 11:58 AM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men16/04/25 02:50 AM
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CustodyBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men03/05/25 12:11 AM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men23/06/25 11:26 PM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men01/06/25 10:18 AM
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Need SupportBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men25/04/25 12:59 AM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men07/10/25 11:45 AM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men30/07/25 06:55 PM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men24/06/25 12:59 PM
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CustodyBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men04/04/25 02:15 AM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men09/09/25 11:36 AM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men16/07/25 02:23 AM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men27/09/25 11:42 PM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men28/09/25 02:44 PM
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CustodyBluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men17/07/25 09:59 AM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men03/10/25 12:30 AM
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Bluey-Dad1987/r/Divorce_Men20/08/25 05:57 PM
Upvotes Comment on Subreddit Date (UTC)
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Just posting for support. No changes. Another day in a six week span off every other Sunday with no work and no children. Day to myself. Having a hard time adjusting to life like this. I feel empty inside. Have a great sense of loneliness. Feel like telling every couple I see that marriage isn't worth it. Have mixed emotions of missing my ex. Had some good memories across the journey of marriage. Especially Fall. Fall taste like sour grapes to me. Majority of Halloween activities are on Saturday…
/r/Divorce_Men12/10/25 04:09 PM
1

How can 8 (15 months by May) months trump 64 months?
/r/Divorce_Men07/10/25 02:24 PM
1

Could she technically make a case. Been doing it for 6 years. Took over for 6 months.
/r/Divorce_Men07/10/25 01:48 PM
1

Standard deduction. Itemized last year. Been doing the taxes last 10 years. Filed together last year. Just wondering like haven't gone to Court yet. Still can't legally divorce till May.
/r/Divorce_Men07/10/25 01:10 PM
1

Only other thing forgot to mention is my ex can go for child support. I let her $200-$300 a month. I gain overall for the year $6,000 to $7,000 in the end.
/r/Divorce_Men07/10/25 12:14 PM
2

I've accepted celibacy and being alone for some time. I mean I have no idea how people date after a divorce unless a Werewolf or Vampire. Like my only free time is three to four days a week from 10 pm to Midnight LoL 😅.
/r/Divorce_Men06/10/25 11:56 AM
5

Not so great mentally. Feel defeated. Been rough few weeks for my oldest mainly. Crying out for help. I financially strapped with OT hours slowing down ATM and medical appointment co-payments totaling $500 a month. My oldest who is six feel is crying for help. 90 times told me doesn't want to live with mom. Doesn't understand why. Has had multiple issues at school days with her mom and a big event recently at school that almost had them spend an entire day in the principal office. My oldest punc…
/r/Divorce_Men04/10/25 08:57 PM
3

Does this sound okay Hi [Ex-Wife's Name], Given [Child's Name]'s recent behavioral issues at school, I wanted to propose a trial change in our routine to see if it helps. How would you feel about me handling the drop-off and you doing the pick-up for X day. Let me know your thoughts."
/r/Divorce_Men03/10/25 02:10 AM
1

I know. Only thing can think of. At least will have it in text not cooperating or putting the interest of the children at heart. Living check to check that's a lot of money where I pay $1,000 a month in bills, $1200 in rent, and $700 on medical bills. Make $3K a month.
/r/Divorce_Men03/10/25 01:09 AM
1

None. Ex dropped a surprise $300 bill on me for my children medical appointments monthly. I am already paying $200 for another child medical appointments a month. Trying to get this one time opportunity with work to get into a program that they'll pay for but need these two courses done so that's $280 a month from August to September. Plus the $100 for my work license. The $200 a month for my ex health insurance. The $300 in car taxes. Have to take time off from work to file. Emergency custody i…
/r/Divorce_Men03/10/25 01:03 AM
1

Six months ago
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/25 09:19 AM
1

We split because we could never parent together. Nor agree on finances. Other stuff. Ex likes to shelter the children and enforce strict discipline & punishment. I rarely talk to my ex anymore.aybe a few text if any changes with the children. That's it. We don't ever talk during the exchanges of the children.
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/25 02:43 AM
1

Hopefully you can. I have zero emotions to my ex. I mean I'll get frustrated if deals with the children but keep my cool. I can forgive my ex. It's hard to stop randomly thinking of events she did during marriage. Mainly my only emotions are fear and anxiety.
/r/Divorce_Men02/10/25 02:13 AM
3

Ex punched hit smashed screamed threw my stuff out of the house slept on a mattress on the floor came home one day ex was gone
/r/Divorce_Men29/09/25 04:40 PM
1

Eventually have to serve my ex. She left one day, kind of knew, and we been ambicale for now. Just protective of her days even if it is better for the children only an hour. Can't be frustrated over things can't control. That's my other lesson learning.
/r/Divorce_Men29/09/25 01:34 PM
1

Same 39 no friends, two children, and in debt. Have a 4 to 5 year plan advance myself with career via going back to school, pay off debt, take my children to Disney, lose 80 pounds, and hopefully buy a house or townhome (happy with the home renting at the moment) then see where life goes from there. Lonely now but the journey ahead I know will not be lonely. I have my two children. I am blessed.
/r/Divorce_Men29/09/25 12:52 PM
1

I've excepted being alone. I mean maybe when my youngest is in Kindergarten may find someone to hang out with during school hours. Life at the moment is work, sleep, school, school for children, children, and so forth. Only down time I have is 10P to 12A three to four days a week. There's this single mom that lives in our complex keeps asking about hanging out and I clearly have no idea how to respond. I feel bad but I have zero time unless they want to go for a walk with my youngest during the …
/r/Divorce_Men29/09/25 12:10 PM
1

I know ex's are so tricky. Can easily offend them by just farting to the east. Reason is basically so my oldest can go to bed on time. Also dealing with ex wives is like the mob. You get something they want something in return. She will say my mother can watch the kids for the two hours you taken away from me this week.
/r/Divorce_Men28/09/25 03:16 PM
1

Same like things are amicable with my ex. People say why not talk in person. Keep everything concrete and in writing. Know my ex past.
/r/Divorce_Men24/09/25 03:17 PM
1

Same. Just thinking about that. I trust my ex about 60% of the time with my children. She will feed them, sort of, and do the basics. My oldest told me, one issue that played a role in our marriage collapsing, my ex will read or be on her phone avoidant of everyone in the house. My oldest child picks up on it. I am literally .3 miles from my children I can't play with them that last hour of the night or give them extra hugs before bed.
/r/Divorce_Men13/09/25 11:30 PM
3

Yes, exactly!
/r/Divorce_Men13/09/25 09:02 AM
1

In my head I like a drink. I never really drank only at celebrations one or two glasses of wine maybe. Thankfully not a drinker. Idk why been going through emotions. Dreams of my ex and I raising a family. Past positive memories with my ex. Thinking of the birth of our recent child a year ago. Then thinking about how my ex treated me. I guess I wronged somewhere. The tension. Then family saying they never liked my ex and what my ex did to them while I was married to my ex. Crossed with emotions.…
/r/Divorce_Men04/09/25 02:39 AM
2

We do a 4-3. Sucks my ex has a full weekend and I don't. It works it works. I contemplated a 5-2. After this week IDK. Basically settled in and home with their mom the next day.
/r/Divorce_Men03/09/25 02:35 PM
2

Just saying it sucks. That does suck. First seperation my ex got me back to live with her again by taking time away from me with my oldest. Think dwindled down to one or two days a week. No overnights. That sucked a lot. Sorry man like I don't what I do if I couldn't see my children. That's my lifeline and motivation to keep going.
/r/Divorce_Men03/09/25 02:28 PM
2

Week 1 Sunday Monday Tuesday Saturday nights/Monday Tuesday Wednesday days Week 2 Sunday Monday Tuesday nights/Sunday Monday Tuesday Wednesday days Holiday this week so family watched my children thankfully. Missed a day this week. Really feels like 2 days too short. Get settled then have to bring the children back.
/r/Divorce_Men03/09/25 11:51 AM
2

I mean I thought I be able to handle it. Summer wasn't bad. I am use going three to five days in a row not seeing my children. The nights after work do get to me not knowing they aren't there. I really contemplate now that my oldest enter Kindergarten thinking of when I file with the Court asking for rotating weekends or if one weekend every other week go for 60/40. This week had to work on the day I had my children due to a holiday. So now only have about 11 more waking hours with my children.
/r/Divorce_Men02/09/25 11:57 AM
2

I have zero emotions in regards to my ex. So much I can't talk to her in person. Do I dislike her. Only when it's annoying stuff. She just abused me, lied, and left. So I am good.
/r/Divorce_Men30/08/25 12:19 AM
1

I didn't ask for divorce..Ex asked about 30 times. Initiated seperation 3 times. Still believe secretly planned moving out few weeks before the 2nd separation. Played games wouldn't tell me where they were going. One day cat out of the bag. Then said X day. Had a feeling knowing my ex schedule from what they shared with me be going one of those days. Showed up to an empty house. After years of physical, mental, verbal, emotional, and financial abuse plug was pulled.
/r/Divorce_Men28/08/25 11:45 PM
2

That takes 90 days and $150. Bit tight with funds. Have some hotel points for a 1 night stay at the local beach. I'll have funds soon but spot of the moment events with going back to school happen. Had to make the jump drop the $700 to pay for that. I know custody is important but stopping the OT making the same making with OT right now only working 3 days that's the best life for the kids, ha.
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/25 11:11 PM
1

No custody agreement.
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/25 06:15 PM
1

Trust me I know! I tried to negotiate family pick them up 5 or 6 in the evening. Ex and I leave at 0600 for work.
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/25 05:42 PM
2

We are a Sunday through Wednesday. Then every other Sunday. Going to try for 60/40. Hopefully by January have Every other Saturday and Sunday. Main days be Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday. Less time with mom better for the children and less longer stretches better. The 4 night stretch is the issue with reset. Then also my kiddo on Sunday night is jacked up so doesn't go to bed till 11 at night on a school night. Only solution for that is we rotate Sunday night as well. Week 1: Dad custody on Tues…
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/25 03:32 PM
1

Custody Schedule ​Week 1 ​Dad's Custody: Dad has the children on Monday, Tuesday, Wednesday, and Saturday. ​Mom's Custody: Mom has the children on Sunday, Thursday, and Friday. ​Exchanges: ​Sunday Night at 8PM: The child is exchanged to Dad. ​Wednesday Night at 8 PM: The child is exchanged to Mom. Friday Night at 8 PM: The child is exchanged to Dad. ​Week 2 ​Dad's Custody: Dad has the children on Sunday, Monday, Tuesday, and Wednesday. ​Mom's Custody: Mom has the children on Thursday, Friday, an…
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/25 01:59 PM
1

I have family document everything for me. The confide a lot in their cousin and Aunt on my side of the family. Female to female I guess. For me I get the emotions. As far as parental alienation all speculation do think my ex has started that. One with my youngest saying "you're dumb" "you're stupid". The hitting me is because they witnessed their mom hit me. Also alienation with my ex not allowing me to take my children to extracurricular activities or medical appointments.
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/25 01:37 PM
2

It's awful just destroys you. Especially because my oldest has said since my ex moved out and I moved in with family rather be with me then their mom. Was a weekly occurrence and then an everyday occurrence. Then public crying and tantrums on the days going back to their mom's at night. To one episode of them vomiting being so anxious having to go back to their mom's. Even asking why we can't let mom keep the younger sibling and I have them. Begging multiple times to stay with us. Stay with me. …
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/25 12:57 PM
1

My ex emotionally, financially, verbally, and mentally abused me for about 8 year's. 3 years of physical abuse. 3 years of emotional and mental abuse from their family member. Been manipulated by my ex. Ex manipulated and guilt trip me to burn ties with friends and family. Ifeel you. I already had confidence issues and this just tanked my self-esteem. Just gotta keep on moving forward I guess. Learn from the past.
/r/Divorce_Men20/08/25 10:19 AM
1

Right like I felt so defeated today. Two nights my child who is 95% the sweetest child in the world smacked me in the face Sunday night. Last night hit me a few times, rocked in a corner crying, limit tested, and told me multiple times they didn't love me. Like what am I doing wrong. Just tell myself don't think my kiddo understands doing all I can. If I expose the truth can rip you away from both of us. What mom is doing is wrong but legal. My hands are tied. Love to have my children 7 days a w…
/r/Divorce_Men19/08/25 02:56 PM
1

I don't think she relocate. Surprised actually involved with school and volunteering. Has never done that before. Signed my child up for an EC so I couldn't take her before I did on her time.
/r/Divorce_Men18/08/25 07:31 PM
1

I stop telling my ex about appointments she always reschedule them to when she has the children.
/r/Divorce_Men18/08/25 07:31 PM
1

Trouble picking the perfect schedule is these reasons... 1.) My ex can get my child ready for school and does a decent job with their hair. Sometimes they don't scrub it, I can tell smells like fish when they come over, or have snarls. 2.) Ex doesn't bathe the children every day. Also, doesn't do a great job with diaper care, and the youngest child always comes over in a rash and is gone by the last day I have them. My youngest gains a pound with me and loses a pound when under the care of my ex…
/r/Divorce_Men18/08/25 03:43 PM
1

Ex wants to keep current schedule Sunday night through Tuesday night Saturday night through Tuesday night Those are my nights at the moment
/r/Divorce_Men18/08/25 01:00 PM
1

I mean would be a prioritizing move. Reasoning over the last few days. Gives the children an extra day with me that would be beneficial. Though time with me would be less, it is the only downside. More consistency during school days for the children.
/r/Divorce_Men17/08/25 05:15 PM
1

Not much of a change from what we are already doing. The only difference is that I gain on Wednesday night and lose on Sunday night.
/r/Divorce_Men17/08/25 04:22 PM
1

I am not sure if a GAL would support 7/7 if they talk to my oldest. It would be similar to what happened when I was a child, ex would probably get the same custody arrangement as my dad.
/r/Divorce_Men17/08/25 03:08 PM
1

My ex won't agree to that. She likes the current schedule. I don't want to do 7/7 for various reasons. Could rotate Wednesdays, Fridays, or Monday/Tuesday & Wednesday/Thursday. If I do not have a full weekend, I would like an extra day in exchange. One reason I like to have 4 consistent days during the week is to help my children with school. Cut down on time with my children, unfortunately, and lessen weekend activities. Also, every six weeks, there is a full weekend with the children due to ex…
/r/Divorce_Men17/08/25 01:42 PM
1

Thought process was fewer transitions, fewer transitions during the week, and more consistency for the older child during the week, which should hopefully make school a bit smoother.
/r/Divorce_Men17/08/25 09:23 AM
1

Ex wants to keep it similar to where I have every other Sunday. Then my set days are Sunday night through Tuesday night with a Wednesday exchange at 8 PM. Willing to give up weekends for an extra night during the week when school is in session. Then have rotating weekends in the Summer.
/r/Divorce_Men17/08/25 06:35 AM
2

My ex is more verbal abusive than anything. I am nervous to pull any trigger because my ex claims I abused her sent me text over the years claiming I abused her. Nothing physical just mental, emotional, and financial abuse. My ex did all that to me. At the moment I am broke. I work 3 OT shifts in a 6 week block. Just finished paying and terminating an attorney due to cost. Paid for my children to go to Summer camp, go on vacation, new clothes, school supplies, and so forth. Have to pay my car re…
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/25 02:08 AM
2

Just thinking about this all day. My children would be better if they had the schedule my parents had growing up. Every other weekend for my dad, instead of being my kiddos' Mom, and one evening every week. In my case one extra night. 3 nights for the ex and 4 nights for me (every 4th week has Wednesday night.) Ex gives me $400 a month for child support. Be the best scenario ever.
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/25 01:50 AM
5

Oh no, it's true haha 😂. I mean, my kiddo has been saying this every week since my ex moved out at the end of April. Thankfully, this time, I don't think I had any tear episodes, unless unbeknownst to me. No vomiting episodes outside of anxiety of going back to mom's. So a few pluses. When married, I mentioned it to my ex, but she said it was normal. My ex would cause my oldest to break down into tears and shake. Then get increasingly upset at my oldest because they can't apologize or would cowe…
/r/Divorce_Men14/08/25 01:04 AM
1

Entertaining a 2/2/5/5. Doing a 4/3 for me and 5/2 for my ex. Really enjoy having three days during the week.
/r/Divorce_Men11/08/25 08:40 PM
1

I often consider the idea of a 7 on 7 off schedule for custody. Pros: Consistency and fewer transitions with exchanges for the children. More time with my children. No exchanges during school hours . Both parents can be involved in extracurricular activities. Cons: Daycare: My children have never been in daycare, and the associated costs would be a significant strain on both sides at the moment. Additionally, one child has ongoing medical issues, making daycare potentially unsuitable for them. F…
/r/Divorce_Men11/08/25 08:39 PM
1

Hatred consumed me comes and goes. Especially the 8 nights didn't have my children and my ex was off at work had someone who i don't want watching my children. I learned life is a river. As others said the truth will come out and enjoy the moments with my children. They will still remember the moments and bonds created. That's lasting than lipstick on a pig.
/r/Divorce_Men11/08/25 02:33 PM
1

Been there. Ex used to slap me in the head. Took most of my paycheck said it was never enough needed to work overtime. Then when I did said it was too much. Upset the romance was gone never took her out on dates bought her shiny things or did a honeymoon when we married. Would threaten divorce 30 times and threaten to take the children away unless I complied to her demands. Threaten to call the cops till I complied to her demands. Her family member got upset at me after ordering the wrong McDona…
/r/Divorce_Men11/08/25 12:00 PM
1

I'll have moments, then realize I made mistakes during the separation period and correct them. Things can't control. I really want my children Monday through Friday because their lives would be better with me. I just have to accept that we are on a river.
/r/Divorce_Men11/08/25 11:53 AM
1

I mean my ex made threats to take my children away from me or call the cops unless I met her demands. Locked herself in the bed room so I couldn't sleep with her then if I entered would hit me in the head. Throw my stuff out of the house or just throw it out. Manipulated be to burn all bridges with family and friends saying she was the only family she needed. Would continuously remind me of all the times I helped her. Even though paid half of more of the bills said it was never enough. Upset nev…
/r/Divorce_Men08/08/25 09:53 PM
2

Not fuming like a dragon ready to eat a knight lol 🤣. Just annoying. I mean I know I have to file. Sucks it's on me to file but better I file than my ex. Spent $4,000 on the attorney, $600 on summer camp for my child, $600 on summer vacation for my children, $100 for my license to work, $250 for my car, $150 towards school supplies for my child, and another $400 towards college classes for me. Have three OT shifts coming up in the next schedule. Took $500 out of my PTO, put it into my paycheck n…
/r/Divorce_Men08/08/25 09:38 PM
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Technically I work 48 to 60 hours a week then have the children four days a week. I never have any time to myself. I have exercised last three days. Took two good naps. Plan to get up early do gym and run. Went shopping for school supplies for my children. Built a dresser. Cleaned my children's rooms. Deep cleaned the bathroom and organized my closet. I have to get a car inspection tomorrow. I planned to knock out work stuff but feel like I ran out of time tonight maybe. Skip the gym get up earl…
/r/Divorce_Men08/08/25 08:26 PM
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I know I was thinking today when she said I want a divorce because I loved the dog more than her. This was due to me not throwing the dog out on the highway.
/r/Divorce_Men08/08/25 08:03 PM
1

I just hope they don't hate me. I fought like Hell to get them this week. I mean watching my child vomit due to anxiety of going back to their mom's lives in my head on replay all week.
/r/Divorce_Men08/08/25 08:01 PM
1

I am I just am broke. I wasted $4K on an attorney. Just trying to get through the Summer. Had a lot of extra fees with the move and getting adjusted. Finally dust is settling can pay the Court fees and get this done correctly. My ex took my entire paycheck when married the last three years. I am bouncing back. Pretty sure CPS won't do much reporting to them that someone on 20 mg of oxy instant release Q4 is watching the the children and smokes half pack of cigarettes in the house with the childr…
/r/Divorce_Men08/08/25 08:00 PM
1

I am I took out $500 from my vacation time to be added to my next paycheck. Talked to family asked them to watch my child two Wednesdays from today filing the Summons that day. CPS want to avoid unless my child says something at school. Have two family members still talk to and one helps me at the moment. Family member knew someone where the Dad filed CPS claims then the mom made claims. Then they had to call in a family member to move right away had 48 hrs or kids went to foster care. The paren…
/r/Divorce_Men08/08/25 07:50 PM
1

Not. My ex Aunt medical stuff is linked to my children's. Can't access it just basically alerts me to when they have appointments. Tried to disconnect from it but they can't figure out why it's connected. It's something on my ex end. Basically want emergency custody because that see you next Tuesday of an ex left my children with a person who can barely take care of the children, doesn't take them outside, leaves them in poop, falls asleep watching them, leaves them around dog poop, keeps them i…
/r/Divorce_Men08/08/25 04:22 PM
1

What's destroying my soul. Plan at midnight to disappear and reset. My children are with my ex for 8 days. Just inside not doing anything. Happiness just eroded for them.
/r/Divorce_Men07/08/25 12:14 AM
2

I know. Work is burning me out. I put in a lot of overtime this summer to give my children the best summer possible, with camp and vacations. Now, I have a few things to take care of, such as paying my license fees for work and finishing preparations for my oldest child's school. I also need to manage car expenses. In September, I hope to pay the fees for the court to get things moving. I feel like I've wasted almost $4,000 on the lawyer since not much happened. It's a learning experience. I pla…
/r/Divorce_Men06/08/25 11:17 PM
2

Well... My ex never truly liked me I felt. Always felt I treated her as a roommate and asked her for money. Felt I took advantage of her and was annoying. Now annoying part I agree with. Have OCD, am a neat freak, snap my fingers randomly, and sing spontaneously. Also, have a dark humor and zero filter at times. I also did the cooking, the cleaning, paid most of the bills, took care of the children, did activities with her children, up all night if the children were sick, made appointments for t…
/r/Divorce_Men06/08/25 06:09 PM
1

Plan to run. The worse part is my ex lives .3 miles away from me so have to run past where my kids are. Like ugh I am so close but so far.
/r/Divorce_Men06/08/25 02:18 PM
4

Live in the South plan to go to trial. Negotiated five times with my ex. Going to file a Summons. Really don't think mediation will go anywhere and eventually end up in Court. Good luck!
/r/Divorce_Men04/08/25 01:54 AM
1

Fixed it. Know sucks ex reads messages here. Told me the first separation.
/r/Divorce_Men01/08/25 05:29 PM
1

Communication? What's that? LoL that shipped sailed with the ex. Bed wetting was happening when married with the oldest and the yelling at the child for it. Ex uses the tablet like crazy when married. LoL ex never goes out of the house and puts on a horror show with the kids, give them the tablet. I give the tablet so my child can avoid getting in trouble, not feel bored, and avoid being yelled at.
/r/Divorce_Men01/08/25 12:06 PM
1

My ex will be superficially pleasant when interacting with them. Occasionally their old self will crack through. They are super manipulative. Won't discuss anything. Leaves you in the dark. Leaves random text on how to raise the children in a non-negative manner. Will change medical appointments after you tell me. Schedule extracurricular activities on their time, unless they mess up when they schedule.
/r/Divorce_Men01/08/25 11:03 AM
3

I used to be 130, then 15,0, then 190 when married, then 220, first child, then second child, 280, now 265. Trying to work out, trying to motivate myself. My end goal is to get down to 190 by May of next year.
/r/Divorce_Men30/07/25 07:22 PM
1

The kiddos weren't a handful. Was just a lot. Lot of unpacking and packing. Lot of being a mule. Lot of having the right people there to help. Lot of you have to have a plan. So forth. Not criticizing my ex. Just know her. Plan to discreetly give her heads up when I drop them off saying how the kids had a good time so forth. Then also describe the area not in too much detail but as a subtle hint.
/r/Divorce_Men30/07/25 09:43 AM
1

Well my ex tried to schedule the EC on her time. I have been the one that has paid for the EC. Also, taken my child to the EC. Example my ex said we split camp this Summer. Been paying in full and my ex has skipped taking my child to camp on days she has her.
/r/Divorce_Men18/07/25 12:20 AM
1

X and I both work 12 to 14 hr days 3 to 4 days a week. Our children have never been in daycare with exception preschool for our oldest now kindergarten.
/r/Divorce_Men18/07/25 12:18 AM
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I mean am worried about causing PTSD on my oldest. Ending the life or hospitalizing my youngest. Having my oldest kicked out of school. Ex in trouble with the law soon. The fly infestation. Not having funds to buy my children food or clothes (though makes more than me.) Just fears driven by my ex last and current events going on.
/r/Divorce_Men16/07/25 01:33 PM
1

Child care really isn't the main issue here. My ex and I are both away from 6:00 AM to 9:00 PM. While she will have the kids during that time, she may also be working. I have asked her five times about her schedule, including regarding the separation agreement that she refused to discuss. A family member she relies on to watch the children cannot transport the oldest child to school, and my ex hasn't taken me up on my offer for my mom to help with this. I suggested that I could arrange for my mo…
/r/Divorce_Men13/07/25 03:26 AM
1

That's not that bad that was like a normal day for five year's haha. Ex asked for a divorce 20 plus times. Seperated 3 times. Swear and belittle me. Yell at me in front of the children. Hit me in the head throughout the years. Slapped and punched me in front of the oldest child. Threw my stuff out of the apartment. Smashed things in front of my child. Threaten to call the police on me in front of my child. Lock herself in the room. Believed I was cheating on her constantly.
/r/Divorce_Men12/07/25 12:57 PM
1

We have no custody agreement. Basically, I sent her an agreement, and she rejected it. Next step is I have to file a Child Custody Complaint and a few other things with the Court. I will probably do that in August. Have time off the first week and my ex is on vacation. It will take about 30 to 90 days. Then think it ends up with public mediation at that point, so about October, be in mediation. Just recording keeping things in text. Showing not cooperating or being in agreement if it does eventu…
/r/Divorce_Men10/07/25 08:24 PM
1

Dang that's hard and the feels. I have one audio of my ex hitting me, swearing in front of the children, and so forth. Came from an extensive history of my ex hitting me in the head. Mental, physical, emotional, and financial abuse. Manipulating me to turn against family and friends. Not letting me have friends. Ex requested divorce about 20ish times. Ex has a history of verbally and emotionally abusing our children. Feeds the children garbage. Doesn't take them outside. One family member that l…
/r/Divorce_Men09/07/25 02:16 AM
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Pretty much. Had a neighbor who is a retired paralegal. They told me to go to someone who give me a discount and their friends used them. My jaw dropped when I heard the hourly cost. Mine was $250-$280 an hour or $80ish if had to ask a questions on the low end. I limited questions. The attorney wanted to speak to me 4 or 5 times over the last few months to gather information for the case. It sucks probably should of just done Chat GPT.
/r/Divorce_Men07/07/25 03:37 PM
1

We don't know if my ex has an attorney Ex hasn't said anything about what happens next after being seperated outside of we moved to different domiciles. Have to prove we both lived in two different places for a year before being divorced in our state. My next steps are can have the attorney file for custody custody complaint or myself. The other option is see if my ex is open to private mediation.
/r/Divorce_Men07/07/25 03:27 PM
1

This may be peer speculation and my mind going down a rabbit hole. There were pictures from my child's camp. Days with me smiling and happy. The day my ex took my daughter, not smiling, and not in the shoes I gave my ex. I'm not sure. The shoes she sends my daughter in are two sizes too small, or she sends them over in Winter Boots. I do believe I gave my ex some jelly shoes as well during an exchange with a shoe size that fit my daughter, who did wear those to camp.
/r/Divorce_Men04/07/25 05:19 PM
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May consider that. Everyone says wait till school and school will pick up on changes with your daughter. Plan to get through the Summer see where funds are maybe reach out to a therapist in the Fall.
/r/Divorce_Men04/07/25 02:42 PM
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Yes. Unknown what is going on in the apartment now that I am out. Zero evidence. Just worry for my child. I love them. I feel a fight I can't win. Destroys me.
/r/Divorce_Men04/07/25 02:07 AM
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My relationship with my ex largely depends on the circumstances—specifically whether the situation is upwind or downwind of a fart, if you catch my drift. A lot of our issues stem from the relationship my ex has had with our daughter since they were younger. My ex, when I was married to her, often raised her voice, swore at our child, grabbed her by the wrist, and made negative comments about her. As a result, my daughter is afraid of her mom. I've observed many interactions where my daughter ei…
/r/Divorce_Men04/07/25 12:54 AM
1

Right. Ex and I are both nurses. I am haven't told my ex but if it goes to a Judge they won't give a shi* about our work schedules. May have to come to that point. Basically my ex doesn't like OT I do. So she works 6 out of 14 days in a pay period I do 7 in a 14 days period. We both try to do 3 or 4 in a row.
/r/Divorce_Men02/07/25 07:14 PM
1

Not for my child. Have a odd situation. Run down oldest doesn't want to be with my ex. Oldest wants to stay with me. Have to work 6 out of 14 days (1 extra day) Have family that can watch my children Thursday and Friday Work is 0600-2030/2100 (same for ex and I) Ex initiated divorce but won't hash out custody agreement
/r/Divorce_Men02/07/25 05:57 PM
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Appreciate that. One of my children is school age. Was contemplating having them Monday through Friday. Only two days I wouldn't be able to watch the children. Playing Chess at the moment. Sent my ex an agreement. If I send my work schedule she will go against the agreement. Send her anything different then the agreement she will agree to it. On the flip side she could come back say these are the days I am working before the July 7th deadline then I look like I am not compromising. Trying to fig…
/r/Divorce_Men02/07/25 01:48 PM
1

We don't have a traditional work schedule, and we are nurses. Funny mention drop off. I was reviewing the schedule and realized that I have to drop my children off the night before. Now have to revamp it. Hope my ex doesn't sign the agreement. We leave work at 0600 and return by 2030 (on a good day).
/r/Divorce_Men02/07/25 01:11 PM
1

There's other ways to alternate not by week?
/r/Divorce_Men02/07/25 12:37 PM
2

That's my mindset this is the schedule for life. Any change my Ex would contest I feel like. My attorney even told me before going pro se this is the schedule have to go to Court for changes.
/r/Divorce_Men02/07/25 12:03 PM
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I am torn. I have time to change the schedule at work. Put in a work schedule of Th/Fr/Sa and W/Th/Fr. Then, the days off I have, I have my children on those days is the plan. Every Wednesday is my daughter's ballet class. Friday's are school events so IDK. If an event comes up can easily work a Sunday take off that Friday.
/r/Divorce_Men02/07/25 11:54 AM
1

I plan not to use my attorney anymore. I am maxed out with cost. They drew up papers to create a custody agreement/contract to get us through till next year. My ex has till next week to sign. I have a feeling she won't. I was going to ask her what type of custody arrangement she like and see if we could negotiate something in mediation. If it seems something we can't then mediation wouldn't be worth the cost to do so. There is two things I wouldn't budge on. Giving up child tax credit (Uncover t…
/r/Divorce_Men30/06/25 11:45 AM
1

Like how do they prove it. Seems like a she said he said. I mean text are not legal documents you can't use that. My ex always said I financially, emotionally, and mentally abused her. Called me a gaslighter. Said it in text. Then after the divorce I was the one abused. From physical to all the rest. Makes us men worry about the ex's like what are they scheming. How could they prove it.
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/25 11:29 AM
1

100% vibe I felt.
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/25 01:07 AM
2

I won I have the children
/r/Divorce_Men29/06/25 12:30 AM
1

That's what I was wondering. We live in the same complex. I was going to message her to come by after work to pick the children up. Then if it says no, then message her I am here to pick the children up. Then, if I said no, I was contemplating going to the door knocking, but then I was thinking that's a bad idea.
/r/Divorce_Men28/06/25 01:04 AM
1

I was driving home thinking that if my ex doesn't agree to me picking them up tomorrow, and I show up, I wonder if I'll face some legal issues. Wonder if saying I'll be there to pick the children up constitutes a threat.
/r/Divorce_Men28/06/25 12:52 AM
1

5 years old going on 6 years old. I mean, a few times my oldest said she did not want to go home with mom, was okay, that's okay. Would tell my oldest you'll see me in X amount of days. After multiple comments by my oldest, I now feel I have to be more proactive. I am trying to figure out a schedule that would incorporate rotating weekends, a max of four consecutive days for my Ex, and give me either a Wednesday or Friday with my children every week or every other week.
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/25 03:04 PM
1

Those are the days I have my children. Be four days a week outside of the Summer. With alternating weekends. It's a 6-2 schedule for me and my Ex a 4-2 schedule. At the moment we are doing a 3-4 schedule. With a proposed 5-2 schedule for me and a 4-3 schedule for my Ex. I apologize if I sound rude, electronic writing can sound offensive at times. As I mentioned in the original message my oldest child doesn't want to go back with their mom. This has been going on for a few weeks and mentioned a f…
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/25 01:34 PM
1

That's a great idea. Have till July 7th. I feel my Ex will reject it. Everyone around me is saying she will because I put in the agreement I claim the child tax credit every year. On the flip side I am paying the children's health insurance premiums every year.
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/25 10:57 AM
1

I had an attorney draw up an agreement and send the paperwork over to my Ex. My attorney created a schedule where I have the children five nights in a row, my Ex has them for four nights in a row, then I have them for two nights in a row, then my Ex has them for three nights. Then we repeat the schedule. With what my daughter is saying and I don't think my Ex will sign the papers. Thinking with mediation. Plan to ask my ex if they want to split the cost of private mediation and go that route. Wi…
/r/Divorce_Men25/06/25 08:00 AM
1

5 going on 6
/r/Divorce_Men23/06/25 11:35 PM
1

$27 inpatient acute care ex makes $34 an hour inpatient acute care
/r/Divorce_Men19/06/25 01:57 AM
1

I mean I can't see what else my ex would want. 60/30 custody. There's not much else to disagree on.
/r/Divorce_Men19/06/25 12:52 AM
1

Can't get credit cards tried.
/r/Divorce_Men19/06/25 12:51 AM
2

I am in the South. Ex and I work for the same hospital. With 2 OT shifts and her off my insurance we make even at $4400 a month each of us.
/r/Divorce_Men18/06/25 11:48 PM
1

I figure we could probably afford private mediation they can file for us. Not sure if they be able to. Mediators in the area are attorney's. That's what someone said the clerks are very helpful at family court. With the agreement I sent maybe 3 minor details that have to be changed. Asked my attorney about what if my ex wants modifications they said it's this or that not that.
/r/Divorce_Men18/06/25 11:36 PM
1

I feel a mediator be easier. We have zero assets outside of two car loans. Just two children. I have a custody agreement written up. Can go off of that. I think my ex won't agree. I didn't catch it before my attorney sent it out. They updated the agreement with drop off at noon on Sunday wanted 6 to 7 in the evening for drop offs. My ex probably won't agree to me claiming the children every year. Negotiate 50% to 25% of the tax refund when my ex claims. These are easy modifications. There's not …
/r/Divorce_Men18/06/25 11:05 PM
2

No literally I am broke. I am a Nurse make only $3K a month unless OT. Have with rent, children, attorney fees, food, and debt in the red zero to the name. Can't afford anything else nor am I eligible for any loans or credit cards.
/r/Divorce_Men18/06/25 11:03 PM
3

I asked to claim every year due to paying for insurance premiums.
/r/Divorce_Men18/06/25 10:45 PM
1

That's the plan. I wanted the agreement drawn up so if did go to mediation have it ready. If my ex agrees I'll get the agreement signed and notarized.
/r/Divorce_Men10/06/25 07:25 PM
1

Ex and I are both nurses. Same everyone says do 7 on. My children never been in daycare. We always been off one of us so don't want to start that for them. I proposed I have MT and ex has ThFr. We rotate WSaSu.
/r/Divorce_Men10/06/25 01:37 PM
1

If need be I can use my car currently financing as collateral for a loan. I owe $360 right now to the attorney and probably owe about $1,000-$1,500 after everything is said and done. They charged me $360 in one week. I set a $65 a month for a payment of $1,000, so it should get me through at least four weeks with the attorney to get myself back on track, hopefully by then. Basically, I just need this custody agreement drawn up and notarized if my ex agrees. If it doesn't go to mediation, then I …
/r/Divorce_Men10/06/25 01:14 PM
1

That's good news. Contract says pay on 5 days if not we suspend the case or withdraw.
/r/Divorce_Men10/06/25 11:44 AM
1

I feel no sadness. Though mix of emotions of anger rage paranoia fear and anxiety haha 🤣 from this divorce
/r/Divorce_Men03/06/25 04:49 PM
1

Attorney ghosted me
/r/Divorce_Men01/06/25 12:21 PM
1

Kids in hand ex aware but no response from them
/r/Divorce_Men01/06/25 12:36 AM
2

The goal tonight is tactfully have the kids in my custody without being an aggressor spin the story on my ex if she pushes on me down the road. This was the verbal agreement you changed it I never agreed to what you wanted. Worse case make my ex the aggressor to have her arrested if need be.
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/25 11:49 PM
2

Yep. Verbal agreement: we each have the children one week, 3 nights,, and the following wee,k, 4 nights. Been doing this for six weeks since we moved out. This is my 4-night week. My ex texted me this convoluted text one hour before pick up of me bringing the children home tomorrow night and having them two other nights next week, cutting me short a night. I was smart didn't agree to it. My goal is to get the children in the car. I feel my ex will start talking about it at exchange not give me t…
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/25 11:44 PM
3

No court order at the moment. Attorney hasn't done anything. I mean they send me a bill for hours working on my case but nothing done yet. I could tap into my ex rage, it's been dormant for a few months, let them hit me get arrested.
/r/Divorce_Men31/05/25 11:40 PM
8

For me it was due to the children. Also Stockholm Syndrome and PTSD.
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/25 05:45 PM
4

My ex withheld sex as a punishment to.
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/25 05:44 PM
1

Right has me stressed out to the gills for next year. Next year going for my RN, currently a nurse, I'll make $5-$10 more an hour so I can give my children a better life. It's only 2 to 3 semesters long (max 48 weeks) have 5 days of school & work a week. Hoping that if I have to do the program going to school during the week not online she will be super flexible with us adjusting the schedule, but I have many doubts that she will.
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/25 04:28 PM
1

I am thinking of changing the schedule when school comes around for my oldest. The Saturday night exchanges I feel can cause some issues down the road. Have yet to figure a schedule that would work LoL. Really her mom is the point scoring dickhead.
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/25 03:08 PM
8

I was slapped, punched, and hit by my ex..Ex would swear at me and call me names. Then also support me and sign car loans for me. Help me out financially. Other times would not and financially abuse me. Then mentally and emotionally abused me. Also, verbally abused me. Manipulated me in so many ways. Only wanted me to have children. Coerced me into pushing away family and friends. Initiated divorce 15 to 20 times. Seperated 3 times. One tile withheld me seeing my oldest child, only child at the …
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/25 02:52 PM
1

I plan to go pro se. All I want is the custody agreement drawn up.
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/25 11:20 AM
1

Nice. Mine has done nothing. Probably stuff behind the scenes. They set up 5 scheduled calls that took my entire $2,500 retainer and owe $94 which could of helped me this Summer with my children.
/r/Divorce_Men30/05/25 11:18 AM
1

ATM waiting for the attorney to draw custody papers up. I am hoping I can amend it with my ex.
/r/Divorce_Men28/05/25 08:04 AM
1

Feel worse because I don't know how my oldest will feel. They been dreading going back to my ex on day of exchanges. I told them I was going to have them tomorrow night now I won't till Wednesday. I feel horrible inside thinking about them.
/r/Divorce_Men27/05/25 03:36 AM
2

The word I'm looking for is "nurture." I genuinely believe I would be happier if my ex had the kids three days a week. Unfortunately, I need to finish my education before that can happen. For example, my oldest child has mentioned that at their mom's house, they primarily eat pasta, pizza, or noodles. They frequently go out for fast food and rarely have vegetables. My daughter has noticed having a lack of clothing. My ex says they bathe the children, but I question it as over the course of the y…
/r/Divorce_Men22/05/25 10:29 AM
2

I mean I know she loves them. Not a bad person. I can't see the bad in people one of my weaknesses in life. I was to blame for part of our marriage ending. Just was never going to work. I am grateful that my ex and I were able to create two amazing children. I will forever be thankful to her for that gift. Our differences there is so many. I knew for awhile we were very different. I know we have different parenting styles. I know this sounds horrible to say. I will admit it's not 100%. I make su…
/r/Divorce_Men22/05/25 03:52 AM
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7 days can't do reasons for children health and mental well-being.
/r/Divorce_Men21/05/25 10:58 PM
1

I know it breaks my heart. My oldest was talking about not having toys, not sure if they do or not. Not having clothes. Since my ex moved where I live didn't go out at all today with our child. I just feel awful leaving them with their mom for long periods. Then add in the risk of corporal punishment for them at their mom's. Mom not cleaning the house. Not getting a bath and questionable if school work will be done or not.
/r/Divorce_Men16/05/25 01:41 AM
2

Idk if I can or be good the little ones. My oldest didn't want to go home. I can see how she makes changes, already 6, calculating her responses. It's just not a good environment not a bad environment to have a court pull them out of the house with their mom, if that makes sense.. 5-2-2-5 would be a lot easier. Idk.
/r/Divorce_Men15/05/25 10:30 PM
1

I went back after the first seperation. I really didn't try couples therapy due to cost, life became busy, thought things were doing okay, and thought I can get through it. Felt like losing my soul. Flash forward 2 years had a second child. Ex wanted a seperation twice this year and now seperated for the third and final time. Hoping do it right this time. First time just did days with my only child at that time. Second go around stayed in seperate parts of the apartment. Now have nights with my …
/r/Divorce_Men06/05/25 04:46 PM
2

I plan to just become a hermit and a unic. Dating seems impossible with work, school, and children. Even though I am at the start of the divorce process.
/r/Divorce_Men06/05/25 02:35 PM
2

Going to post something similar. My work schedule and my ex work schedule when married we only see our children maybe an hour or two before they went to bed. With my oldest starting school in the Fall only see them on days off at work. The only difference with the custody arrangement is have 2 to 3 less nights with my children a month. Frustrates me when people offer insight that you should consider daycare. Those days I have the children making every effort to be off and enjoy the moment with t…
/r/Divorce_Men06/05/25 02:26 AM
1

It has.
/r/Divorce_Men03/05/25 12:25 AM
1

Not sure if "co-parenting" is in the future. Trying confabulation at the moment till agreement is signed. Certain things just won't tell my ex and just do as she'll say no like go and get a haircut for my daughter.
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/25 10:05 AM
6

Didn't disclose it I guess can tomorrow. Just so nervous I rarely give my ex too much information because I am nervous she will use it against me.
/r/Divorce_Men28/04/25 04:02 AM
5

It doesn't. Did wake up early and head out to have a cathartic experience as my ex gave me the greenlight to throw everything away in our apartment. Doing that, then get the kids breakfast, and enjoy a sunny day with them today. That's the best life right there.
/r/Divorce_Men27/04/25 11:08 AM
2

Sorry, it goes through a grammar app when posted and never gets reread, ha.
/r/Divorce_Men26/04/25 08:29 PM
1

I am moving next week. I took my rage and anger was constructive. Anything left over by my ex threw out trashed scorched the earth itself chucked it.
/r/Divorce_Men25/04/25 03:13 AM
2

Sucks like my ex said Saturday.. I was planning Saturday. I was planning not coming home tonight. I said I'll come home be with my kids and then ease them into the 4 nights I have them coming up. Nope ex drops the bomb at me at work moving we are gone out of the home. Takes the kids with her. I mean I know where she is. Doesn't even let me say goodbye or see them Saturday. Like I don't even fucking know what my 6 year old is thinking right now.
/r/Divorce_Men25/04/25 01:48 AM
2

Most of my personal items were fine, but some gifts from family for my oldest child went missing, and I wanted to keep those for them. My oldest was sad last night when they walked into their empty bedroom and wanted to grab toys from the toy box. I took the toy box out of the car and left it for them. They also enjoy using my tablet, so I left that as well. I had a feeling they would be moving today, so I spent yesterday getting everything out. Now, I'm coming home from work tonight and I'm wai…
/r/Divorce_Men24/04/25 10:26 PM
1

The main issue is that the more tired my ex-wife becomes, the more verbal abuse surfaces. She also neglects to bathe our children and watches adult shows in front of them. While she has family to watch the children, they have a history of smoking in the house and are using controlled substances. I know that the back-and-forth situation isn't ideal for our children, but I believe the latter option is worse. I've been trying to figure out the best schedule to minimize stress for the children. Init…
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/25 02:55 PM
2

It's no bueno to do a week on week off. I know everyone tells me to. It protects them from abuse and neglect. I have zero evidence and so here we are what we got, ha. Then both have never been in daycare or after care. Youngest has medical issues trying to avoid daycare at the moment. So we gotta make lemons into lemonade.
/r/Divorce_Men23/04/25 02:21 PM
2

Year & a day of not living in the same domicile. Tuesday, 4/28/26, date of filing for divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men22/04/25 03:38 PM
1

Plan to make an addendum to the custody agreement in March,, hopefully. Things change. I mean may want to do 7 and 7 when our oldest is 4 years old. I start school for a year in May. A lot of changes are coming up over the next few years. So I don't want to be too strict or rigid with the schedule. Part of the schedule wants to be rigid due to the MIL.
/r/Divorce_Men22/04/25 02:57 PM
1

My partner separated from me two years ago, and at that time, I discovered that my mother-in-law didn't want me to marry her daughter. We have been married for almost ten years now. My mother-in-law freaked out after I accidentally touched her cheeseburger and didn’t talk to me for nearly two weeks. My ex is moving to a new place that she didn’t want to go to because it’s too expensive. She actually likes where she is currently living. Somehow, she managed to get new furniture and moved there a …
/r/Divorce_Men22/04/25 01:29 PM
2

That's not a huge issue. Even with OT my X would make more than me by about $300-$400 a month.
/r/Divorce_Men21/04/25 09:40 PM
0

I was considering a 50/50 schedule until the summer. Then, by the time my youngest is in preschool, I will transition to a 60/40 schedule with me gaining Wednesday.
/r/Divorce_Men21/04/25 08:57 PM
1

I mean X and I are use to being gone 3 whole days a week. It's the nights. With big kid school starting I won't even see my kiddo on those days. It makes the transition a bit easier. I just feel bad. They do love their mom, especially the oldest.
/r/Divorce_Men21/04/25 01:40 AM
1

I don't think that it has really clicked yet. Confused why everyone is moving and why mom & dad won't live together.
/r/Divorce_Men20/04/25 11:22 PM
1

1 week is impossible. 5 is a stretch in itself. Reasons cannot be explained take a day to do so the story behind the reason why.
/r/Divorce_Men20/04/25 07:17 PM
1

Fixed it
/r/Divorce_Men20/04/25 02:04 PM
1

Only crutch is nights really messed with my emotions. Now this could be had little support only slept 2 hrs. I sleep from 11 to 4 (getting 5 a day) big improvement in mood. My oldest can see the change.
/r/Divorce_Men16/04/25 02:00 AM
1

5 month old with heart condition
/r/Divorce_Men15/04/25 11:51 PM
1

It would be easier. Everyone says mood wise I am better on days. Because nights I have them the 4 nights not on then drop the oldest at school sleep. Have family watch the young one then wake up for pick up. If I do days gets a bit tricky. Think it'll have to be days though. Can't do 7. Just a diaster for the children having them with my X for 7 days. I am going for 60/40.
/r/Divorce_Men15/04/25 10:08 PM
1

7 days on isn't good with my X lot reprogramming tantrums so forth. Basically child running out to the backyard rocking back and forth. Crying. Hitting. Throwing things. Slapping themselves. Anything setting them off. Then great days later.
/r/Divorce_Men15/04/25 08:51 PM
1

They already watched their mom hit me multiple times.
/r/Divorce_Men13/04/25 02:06 AM
2

It's on there. I asked the attorney if I should refinance my car loan or sell it then put my name on that loan with a family member. That way they can't take my car as collateral to pay back the loan of my X.
/r/Divorce_Men12/04/25 01:53 AM
1

Can't be done for reasons will fight to the end of time for.
/r/Divorce_Men10/04/25 01:23 AM
1

Really don't have anything care about. All the stuff I do is out. Rest my X can have. Though think she thought I was going to dump the items not taking. I am just hoping for a... 4 day week, 4 day, 3 day, and 4 day week schedule. Day time rights to my youngest. Have time with kiddos when X has to work and has custody. No child support. Car blanche to raise the children how I want. Parallel parenting. Religious rights. Education rights. Be all set.
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/25 09:45 PM
1

Don't really have access to the bill guess can call. It's $600 her bill. IDK why I did co-sign for that loan.
/r/Divorce_Men05/04/25 09:02 PM
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I may have screwed that too. I thought about that. I mean has been 2 year's since. I dumped all this on my attorney my issues and concerns worried they'll report to CPS.
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/25 05:10 AM
2

Sorry had to be hush with what's going on Basically... My oldest child told their mom that thier maternal grandmother can't watch them and that dad takes better care of them. This ticks my STBX off to think I am bad mouthing and alienating her when the kids are in my care This leads to a chill calm X now back to being angry swearing slamming doors potentially won't work against me come negotiations now Haven't said anything. I did mention to the attorney about my X mom watching the kiddos and co…
/r/Divorce_Men04/04/25 03:55 AM
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Not sure what they won't tell me where they are moving to. I have the address, .2 miles from where I'll be living. They won't tell me when either. Cryptic on when. Lease ends in 4 weeks. Mention custody they oddly seemed okay with it. Feel custody to them is I only have day visits.
/r/Divorce_Men31/03/25 03:58 AM
1

Will be an expensive call tomorrow, ha. I am going to reach out to them tomorrow. Discuss if emergency custody is important or not. Working on not having my name on the lease. Suppose to give a 60 day notice. I also didn't put a forwarding address for them or I may have put an address I would be staying at for a week or two before moving out of that location. So any damages to the apartment would be billed to my X forwarding address. I may move out earlier than expected leave the apartment to my…
/r/Divorce_Men31/03/25 03:37 AM
1

I mean I am moving out in May. Someone was saying not to help pay May rent because I am moving. Then have to start fresh get all new stuff for the children when I move. I mean I don't want to look bad in the eyes of the court.
/r/Divorce_Men29/03/25 12:48 PM
2

That's what I been doing. We stopped communicating the last two weeks. Barely minimum talk about the kids.
/r/Divorce_Men27/03/25 04:47 PM
1

Assets are few and between. 2 cars that's it. Figure the living expenses the X can take over since lease is over when the lease is over. Then move at that time.
/r/Divorce_Men24/03/25 04:53 PM
2

One party state. Recorded few think lost one the big one backed up on the computer.
/r/Divorce_Men24/03/25 04:43 PM
1

It's been 23 days since the rage cage event of being slapped hit punched yelled at items thrown threats of kidnapping and stuff thrown outside.
/r/Divorce_Men24/03/25 04:21 PM
2

No separation agreement at the moment. In the process. Been 2 weeks (12 too 13 days be exact) since my X said she wanted the Divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men24/03/25 04:14 PM
1

Would it be weird, even possible, to do 2-2-3 with the young one and 5-2 with the older one. I am gone 3 to 4 days a week already.
/r/Divorce_Men22/03/25 11:29 PM
1

How do your kids deal with being with the other parent?
/r/Divorce_Men22/03/25 08:38 PM
1

Have a almost 6 and under 12 month old. I really wouldn't want my children with my X more than 4 in a row.
/r/Divorce_Men22/03/25 07:44 PM
2

Feel you brother. I didn't do it. Wimped out because X could lose her livelihood. Still tethered with one loan and a lease for two months. Feel you on the eggshells lasted for a few weeks. X has these rage moments only happen 3 times. I mean outside of those rage moments slapped and verbally abused a lot. The last rage moment scared the poop out of me. My oldest still having a hard time processing it. Stay strong brother and prayers.
/r/Divorce_Men22/03/25 06:45 PM
1

Someone told me a few weeks ago. It's hard to breakout of the abuse. That abuse you are validating this behavior is acceptable. Your child will have a safe place when you leave. The first time my Wife stone walled over night visits and lessen day visits & hours.
/r/Divorce_Men16/03/25 12:22 AM
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Can't afford an attorney and can't afford pro-bono. Going to try the DV route if not venture on my own unfortunately. Pray that it's a pretty amicable divorce.
/r/Divorce_Men09/03/25 08:01 PM
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