I hesitated in sharing this cautionary tale, but after some reflection I figured I would do so in case my experience helps another woman.

So, I began dating what seemed like this amazing guy my former coworkers had set me up with. He came highly recommended, had a good reputation, was incredibly attractive and well dressed, great hygiene, great manners, paid for every dinner, communicated consistently, wanted to show me off to friends and family, and expressed daily how interested he was. Sounds perfect, right? I thought he was. He met every checkmark on the list and we were so compatible - I loved spending time together, but there was one red flag. His ex was allegedly insane and stalking him.

Now. I'm old enough and experienced enough to see that red flag for what it was immediately. What I did wrong was continue to give it a chance. I should have just cut things off at that, but having been on the receiving end of stalking myself and being admittedly very attracted to this person I tried to be empathetic and didn't immediately stop seeing him. In fact, he eventually asked me to be his girlfriend and we were very publicly a couple in our small community for a while.

I just could not shake the feeling that something was going on with his ex though. My radar was going off like a siren. So, I made a choice I am very proud of. Instead of gaslighting myself and burying my concerns for years and trying to play it cool, I messaged his ex. I won't go into an exceptional amount of detail, but I found out that not only had they been sleeping together throughout our dating prior to him asking me to commit, but that she was claiming be pregnant with his child!

Long story short, I still don't know if she was because it did become apparent that this woman was in fact very mentally ill. That part was true. At the end of the day though, I found out our entire relationship was a lie and the person I cared for didn't exist. He didn't care for me. It was all love bombing conducted by a complete narcissist. I'm just glad now that I didn't waste more time on it and relieved that through the help of FDS, I now value myself, my peace, and my time enough to know I am BETTER OFF single than dealing with anyone's Jerry Springer shit. Never doubt your intuition ladies and don't be afraid to bring a situation into the light.