I meet a lot of HVW who seem to get stuck in a cycle of anxiety and self-doubt around their exes: Did I do the right thing? Maybe I should've stayed? He is probably having so much fun without me!!

First of all, it's been established for years that men who are dumped take it much harder than women who are dumped. Men cannot sleep as well without their partner, and have more suicidal thoughts after the end of a relationship compared to women: Why Breakups Are Actually Tougher on Men | Psychology Today So this idea that your ex is partying it up with other women? That he's living a high life without you somewhere? Throw those thoughts away! He is more than likely tossing and turning and getting back into the modern groove of alcohol, drugs and porn.

Toxic thinking of "what ifs" can spoil your new connections and relationships. How can you see a window opening if you're fixated on a closed door? Think about your mental energy. Was your ex really worth all of that energy? Come on. Is he thinking about you on the same level? Is he wondering if he hurt your feelings? NO ! Why dedicate your valuable mental effort to some dude who couldn't even text back? Some dude who didn't bother to remember your birthday, or stand up for you socially? Please!

Comparing a new man to an ex can be never ending. It's so important to recognize patterns, especially if they include red flags. However, I have seen all relationships, including friendships, strain because the woman was clearly not over her LVM / NVM ex. The woman lived in the misery of the past. This is not HVW behavior -- level up! Move on! Grown women move on.

Women seem to have forgotten the aspect of *blamelessness*. This features prominently in the Bible for starters. Many women have been led astray by LVM / NVM and then engage in FOMO thinking ("What if he gets better? What if he improves? He just needs me!"). But why do we even bother to think like this, if we are blameless? If our walk is blameless, if we speak with righteousness (Psalm 15), why do we still feel guilty? It seems like many women recognize there is blame somewhere, and being the responsible individuals we are, we shoulder this blame. NO! There is virtue in blamelessness. Take your fine blameless selves and LEAVE !

Aren't you excited about your future? Think about all of the things you can fill with your life, now that your dumb useless weak ex is gone. Flip through your calendar/ journal etc and focus on the blank spaces. Aren't you excited to fill those up? Focus on the FUTURE! Not the past.