not charging around "dominating" everything. Would rather have a walk around the park and lay in the sun and read than flex in the gym.

Nice to everyone just because it feels the right thing to do, even if sometimes its out of fear, or self preservation, or "getting by".

Want the quiet life.

I'll lead and dominate in my hobbies and my interests, thanks, not some socially constructed status game.

If the girl doesn't like me, well, at least i wasn't an asshole. If the woman is only attracted to shallow gym bros who charge around dominating everything, than is it really any great loss, no matter how hot she is?

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I would describe myself as beta. 5"9, skinny, jaw line good, skinny ass shoulders lol. Have always felt passive in social situations. WAit for girls to approach me rather than approach them.

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I've never had problems with attracting girls, for sex, for relationships, for flirting. I have slept with a dozen or so lasses over my 4 decades. Normally because they found me easy to get on with, comfortable, rather than because I was socially dominant. I was often the quietest at the party.

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Maybe just maybe the "dominant" asshole thing is not what ALL women want ALL the time. One thing I would say is maybe the wanting to be different, wanting to alpha, is the very reason why you are not comfortable in yourself and allowing life to move and flow. If you're young, there's no rush. Just be open to all experience, including your own thoughts and emotions, and see what happens.

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Instead of working on what "women want" - work on what you want for yourself internally. What hurts you? what makes you afraid? What are some negative beliefs you have about yourself. What is your emotional life like from day to day? Are you sad all the time? What thoughts scare you? These are the things to focus on. Free yourself from yourself before even thinking about "what women want". The RP is just an easy fix. Become a calm, stable person and move out into the world. Throw yourself into every situation. Enjoy the mere fact that you we lucky enough to be born, to experience, to see, to hear. If you think women and sex and relationship are a cure all, then your women and sex and relationships will be miserable, it's simple formula. Life is vast. Your own subjectivity is vast - don't hang it all on one hook. The hook will break off the wall.

Trust me on this one - a relationship and sex feels good initially. All those disfigurations you feel inside yourself will be healed. They will vanish. For a while. That's why we are often not seeking true love but finally someone to heal us. It's not true love when the cart is before the horse. But trust me, those problems will come back, they will come back with a vengeance. Some of your problems may disappear with finding sex or a relationship, but you will return to a "baseline" soon enough and life will become the drag it is now again, and your issues will still be there.

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A friendship circle and social network, including family, is far more important than most things in life. Spread those feels. Otherwise you will narrow in on someone and your claws will rip into their flesh. You will become obsessed. Have a spread of people, men and women. Tried to make friends before trying to find lovers. If the girl turns into your lover, then its win win. If you end up friends, it's also win win. Friendships are as satisfying and meaningful as lovers. But this is lost. Sources of love come from everywhere, colleagues, siblings, friends, community. We've tricked ourselves into become attached on just one type of relationship - the romantic and sexual. It's a social construction, largely. Feel humanity around you, giving love, recieving love.

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Why are you hurting? face that full on. Seek well tested and tried scientific methods to heal that. Not some grifter on youtube.

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Imagine as a thought experiment being calm and at peace with yourself. And there's no woman there. Just you. At peace.

"oh but i can't get that until the woman is there"

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there's your problem. That's the tyranny of neediness likely pushing the women away in teh first place.

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why do you need someone there? what is not good about you right now? If a girl rejects you, what does that mean about YOU? the answer to that question perhaps should be dealt with before anything else. Does it mean your....unlovable, weird, unattractive? why do you need someone else to tell you who or what you are?

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"wanting to be better is the reason why you aren't" - alan watts.