Do men seriously have more dating options as they get older?

spiraldinosaur · 2023-02-03T10:13:46+00:00

I doubt that's actually true. Going off the original post, it's suggesting some old red pill tropes which is that women want men with money and "status", and men want women who are under 30. While I'm sure there are examples of this, I don't actually believe it's really that homogenous and what people are attracted to.

If anything I would say a lot of people lose most of these stupid criteria as they get older. Women have their own income and they don't need a sugar daddy. They have their own lives and don't need "status". Men grow out of wanting to date 20 year olds and would actually just prefer someone who's got the same energy levels as he has and would rather spend the weekend going for a nice walk somewhere rather than 3 night benders in clubs or whatever. You'll want someone who's got their own routine, their own grown up life, who's able to look after themselves.

If you want to consider how many options people have, you also need to take into account how many people are single around that age. I'd say as you get into your 30s, more people are already in settled, long term relationships compared with in your 20s. Virtually all of my friends now are either married, engaged, or at least in a long term relationship.

_PinkPeony_ · 2023-02-03T03:57:25+00:00

I'd say no, unless they are well in shape with a full head of hair/have high income.

I agree with you that most young women are not interested in older men, especially if you don't have the above mentioned attributes.

Men 'hit the wall' just like women.

KindlyPizza · 2023-02-03T05:00:33+00:00

The reality is that the demographic that person in the original thread was talking about and belonged to (older, over 40 men) are the demographic where completed suicides happened the most. Or at least the beginning/jump of belonging to such high numbers.

https://afsp.org/suicide-statistics/

Manosphere love to ignore this fact in favor of jeers about cats and wine for older women. Ironically, if they were more open about pet companionship and lone self-enjoyments (let's face it, if cats and wine are the worst thing that can happened to you, you have it GOOD in life), they might have led a happier life.

Are there older men who aged like wine and more financially attractive with age? Sure they are. But most are not. Especially because many do not take care of their mental and physical health during their youth. Destroying body and mind with work, questionable nutrients and often lack of sleep.

softnmushy · 2023-02-03T04:48:24+00:00

I think that some men have no luck dating in their 20s, but in their 30s they have a job and are more mature, so they suddenly have some women interested that were not interested before.

Copperstoner · 2023-02-03T11:28:30+00:00

Based on numbers alone this belief is certainly false, but at least I notice that I have currently more options than before. (Still under 30, though)

The reason is not really "the market", though. It's that I have changed. I have now way better social skills, I look objectively better, because I lost weight and I've built up some muscle mass. I know who I am and I know what I want, which is also very big factor. I would also wager that a shift in priority also happens to women in my age. Many seem to value a mutual understanding on a emotional level and on a intellectual level way more than before, while looks are valued a bit less.

The thing is I'm sure that an attractive women, who is 7 years older than me still has way more options than me. The question is, if there are still so many quality options out there and if those who were considered quality before are still considered quality right now.

My personal conclusion:

To me this belief is wrong, but it might seem so to some men, because a big portion of men actually has more or even any options now, while a big portion of men has less options now.

willstdumichstressen · 2023-02-03T07:55:57+00:00

Not really, I’d say dating options are the best for everyone in their 20s.

fathergoose77 · 2023-02-03T18:21:40+00:00

Guys who say that are probably living in a fantasy of being rich and “high status”, thinking about sleeping with endless models and being Leo D. They were probably unlucky with women all their life and are hoping things will change for the better and “all those young, hot women who rejected me before will be begging to be with me when I’m rich and successful!” At least that’s what it seems like reppill bullshit pushes. Its a fantasy of escapism.

I see a lot of guys with that mindset who are just waiting to go to a foreign country once they have enough money and snag a wife who is vulnerable and desperate for money. Or they say that to justify going after 18 year olds who are naive and inexperienced. It’s pretty sad and messed up.

Personally, my options got smaller as I got older because my standards changed dramatically as I did too. Spending years on my education, going through grad school, and being very career oriented, I am compatible with similar people (especially those in a somewhat similar field to me). I also learned more about myself, so I am more selective about the kind of woman I know I would be a good match with. From comments, your experience sounds kind of similar.

I found an amazing partner though, and what a lot of guys don’t realize is women like her would actively choose NOT to date some high status celebrity because that is incompatible with her lifestyle, same as how I wouldn’t date a famous supermodel. I’m a nerd, if I can’t discuss the fascinating scientific journal I heard about today or cool psych assessment I did or the lingering trauma from grad school (half joke), I’m not interested.

RapQueen416 · 2023-02-04T01:23:08+00:00

Woman here. Most young women are not interested in men more than 3-4 years their senior. The ones who date men 15 years older than them are usually just looking for a sugar daddy

PrincessTiaraLove · 2023-02-03T09:39:07+00:00

I would say these types of older men prey on young vulnerable women. For example look at Andrew Tate. He's 35 and claims only women 18-25 are acceptable and he used them to fund his webcam business. Obviously women in that age rage may not have a means of earning money. If you're looking to take advantage of vulnerable women like passport bros and sex tourists and you consider that as "dating options" then probably, but if you're looking for someone on your intellectual and financial level the probably not.

xvszero · 2023-02-03T05:15:38+00:00

Only around 8% of couples in Western countries have an age gap of 10 years or more. No, you aren't going to be drowning in pussy when you get older, sorry.

https://www.taylorfrancis.com/chapters/edit/10.4324/9780203874370-7/may%E2%80%93december-paradoxes-exploration-age-gap-relationships-western-society-western-society-justin-lehmiller-christopher-agnew

Sabrepill · 2023-02-03T17:25:01+00:00

The aging process itself makes men more attractive to most women up to a point. For example many more women across the population are more attracted to an attractive 30 year old man than an attractive 18 year old man. Especially women in their mid 20s. This is very subjective when looking at individual preferences, but more objective when looking across a broad population.

As men continue to age, the aging process itself is not what makes them more attractive to most women. Most men become less attractive with age. That means most men will become less desirable as they age beyond a certain point unless they do certain things.

However the caveat to this is that a small segment of men do infact get better with age. These are extremely high value men. Usually tall, fit, good looking, socially respected or famous, well dressed and groomed, refined, charismatic, wealthy, etc.

Often these men are the highest value men of all in the overall sexual marketplace and would most easily be represented by Hollywood male leads. The average age of them is 43-44. Men like Henry Cavill, Chris Evan’s, Idris Elba, Jason Momoa, etc.

TLDR: Most men physically peak in looks between 25-35 and go downhill from there. Some men peak later than that due to acquiring wealth, social skills, etc. and A tiny percentage of the highest high value men, as evidenced by Hollywood male leads, peak in their mid 40s and beyond.

So the red pill belief is a half truth. Just turning 40 doesn’t make your dating pool better, for most men it’s the opposite and aging beyond a certain point makes your options much worse.

But if you somehow became rich, wealthy, fit, good looking, charming, etc through self development than you may infact have a much larger and better dating pool in middle age. Wealthy good looking older men have far more sexual marketplace power than average people realize.

PollutionSame7997 · 2023-02-03T21:28:47+00:00

I think you’re projecting your experience as a generalisation for all men

Similar-Exam4498 · 2024-10-15T18:22:19+00:00

Wrong! This is incel nonsense getting fed to men. No decent women will go for a man just because he has more money and status. Women care about attraction very much. Undesirable men hope they can attract women with their money when they get older. These are the men women are not attracted to. Women want men around their own age they are physically attracted to. It’s the loser/ugly men’s ultimate revenge fantasy.

Naus1987 · 2023-02-03T11:55:49+00:00

Men have it easier as it’s not a social taboo for a 30 year old guy to date a 20 something woman.

I’m in my 30s and my partner is 22. And most people don’t even question it.

—-

As I mentioned in that previous post you mentioned, being older, having more resources, etc gives you more options. But more options doesn’t mean quality.

The important thing is that age gives you more wisdom to see through the bullshit and focus on quality.

—

Being invested in a career, house, or location can make dating harder for older people as they’re more locked down in their location. Older people are like stubborn boomers that way lol.

It’s one of the reasons why I think dating a younger woman is a lot easier, because she’s not established and she’s a lot more accommodating to my schedule and work.

Eagleburgerite · 2023-02-03T13:09:50+00:00

Yes, in a word.

Normal_Egg_3469 · 2023-02-03T07:09:30+00:00

Most people, men and women, peak 18 to early 30s in the sexual market place.

Women will always have options no matter her age because men on average are more thirsty than women. However, the QUALITY of options will definitely decrease for a woman by the age 35-40. Her looks, youthfulness, fertility, etc. will start to drop by that age.

Meanwhile, if a man who takes physical, mental, emotional, and financial care of himself, will on average have more options in his 30s-40s than his female counterparts in their 30s-40s.

Great example, who has more QUALITY options: 42 year old Tom Brady or a 42 year old female former model? The former is the answer.

uniquename1992 · 2023-02-03T11:44:13+00:00

I don't feel like I have more dating options but I am def more selective in my 30s than 20s. For example, I'm swiping right way less in my 30s in online dating. Also, how do you define "dating option", are we just counting the number of matches you get from dating apps?

theradtacular · 2023-02-03T16:51:49+00:00

From personal experience, I never really had options when I was younger and I still don't. Maybe I have to wait until I'm 60? 🤦🏻‍♀️

MrMeeeseeeks19 · 2023-02-03T19:48:40+00:00

Dr_Lovemuchmore · 2023-02-03T20:05:18+00:00

Depends more on the person, where they are, if they take care of themselves,who they go after, ect. Applies to men and women.

pinealpresence · 2023-02-03T20:34:07+00:00

I can attest to not having much in the 20s. I'd hope there's more options as I build value.

RobertB16 · 2023-02-03T22:23:30+00:00

Here is some interesting information; women hit the peak at 18 and the decline, while male peak at 50, but it's an almost Power-Score flat line. Note:it's online dating, so there's that.

https://www.theatlantic.com/science/archive/2018/08/online-dating-out-of-your-league/567083/

Title	Do men seriously have more dating options as they get older?
Author	Gmed66
Upvotes	23
Comments	101
Date	February 3, 2023 3:42 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/ExRedPill
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/exredpill/comments/10sa3yb/do_men_seriously_have_more_dating_options_as_they/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/ExRedPill/do-men-seriously-have-more-dating-options-as-they.1151086 https://theredarchive.com/post/1151086

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