So I'm the Drunk Captain. How do I know identify structural improvements v. something that only makes me more of a plowhorse?

HornsOfApathy · 2023-08-26T00:14:27+00:00

Try rubbing her butthole.

KagedRageius · 2023-08-25T18:58:54+00:00

A major part of going from drunk captain to captain is gaining the knowledge of what to do. You know your ship better than anyone.

MoonLandingHoaxer · 2023-08-25T20:45:16+00:00

I was a literally drunk captain. The first order of business was to stop drinking.

You need to lead, but to do that, you need a direction so you can set the course of the boat.

Forget about your wife and find a mission in life that captivates you and makes you a better, more valuable man.

If you have something in your life compelling, you won't get hung up on any of her emotional bullshit. You will be thinking about your mission. From her perspective, you will be unshakable, and she will feel certainly and safety having you there. No matter how bad the storm gets, you will hold strong.

I'm writing this to myself, not to you.

I need to write an OYS, I haven't done it in years.

businessstravel · 2023-08-25T21:47:04+00:00

Lazy post = Lazy answers

Remington-Holmes · 2023-08-25T19:24:37+00:00

Which drunk captain are you?

https://www.reddit.com/r/marriedredpill/comments/2yrxtp/the_three_dysfunctional_captains_and_first/?utm_source=share&utm_medium=android_app&utm_name=androidcss&utm_term=1&utm_content=2

What are your stats (age, height, weight, deadlift, squat, bench press, body fat percentage)?

ragnar_Daneskjold · 2023-08-25T19:48:54+00:00

The trick is to make these judgements for yourself and if you feel regret about how you've spent some of your time, you're not being selfish enough.

_RPeed · 2023-08-26T17:57:49+00:00

In what ways are you a drunk captain?

What does that have to do with her feeling alone?

J-VV-R · 2023-08-28T04:33:34+00:00

I have come to this post on four separate occasions.

You have changed and updated this post four times because people have called you out on your shit. Stop being a lazy cunt and OYS.

Tyred_Biggums · 2023-08-25T20:44:48+00:00

It helps to build a spreadsheet and put a ranking on each activity to determine if it’s structural or a plowhorse.

Also should track sex on the sheet and make fancy graphs.

BecomingABetterMan1 · 2023-08-25T18:41:03+00:00

Maybe try reading the sidebar, shutting the fuck up, and lifting..?

Aubrey_D_Graham · 2023-08-26T16:10:20+00:00

Generally, you're not doing enough of this, you're too much of that is a shit test; on the other hand, I feel like we're not close is a comfort test.

In the short term relationship, you don't need to provide comfort since you can spin other plates. In the long term relationship, some comfort aka some beta behaviors must happen. Alpha is why she fucks you. Beta is why she chooses to stay in a relationship with you.

Maybe your woman can handle you at 70alpha/30beta. Maybe she needs a man who is 50/50, but you prefer to be 60/40. The end game is to calibrate your actions in a way that makes the relationship stable and fun.

It seems like your ltr is a little lost and needs comfort. Sex is comfort. Fuck her like you love her and sprinkle a little verbal intercourse. Have fun.

MoonLandingHoaxer · 2023-08-26T12:33:15+00:00

You can't lead if the crew isn't on the boat.

You are 28.

Unless you are a social conservative and are marrying this girl and starting a family, then you should break up with her and only focus on yourself and building your life.

Enough with this LTR horse shit.

You are emotionally weak and don't want to let go. That means you have to.

No shit test, no comfort test. This is a YOU test. Leaving her is the lesson you need right now.

SnooGuavas8229 · 2023-08-26T17:15:06+00:00

Shit/comfort tests --> overthinking --> fucking up --> self reflection --> progress --> shit/comfort test --> repeat

Don't overthink, it solves a lot.

rocknrollchuck · 2023-08-27T15:59:27+00:00

How do I know identify structural improvements v. something that only makes me more of a plowhorse?

Your core question has a really simple answer:

Structural improvements are things you do for YOU to make YOU a better man.

Plowhorse things are things you do for her, or for the relationship.

How do you tell the difference? You ask yourself this question each time beforehand: "How does this benefit ME directly or make MY life better?" If it only benefits her or "improves" the relationship, ask yourself why you are wanting to do it. Improving the relationship should benefit you, however the plowhorse mentality is, in essence, doing things to keep the relationship from deteriorating.

One thing she's said I've fucked up there is that she feels alone sometimes, which I can see and have been working on.

The relationship is the woman's job. Ultimately, every successful relationship is successful for the same exact reasons.

Title	So I'm the Drunk Captain. How do I know identify structural improvements v. something that only makes me more of a plowhorse?
Author	linkofinsanity19
Upvotes	4
Comments	29
Date	August 25, 2023 6:38 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askMRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/1617e9s/so_im_the_drunk_captain_how_do_i_know_identify/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askMRP/so-im-the-drunk-captain-how-do-i-know-identify.1229785 https://theredarchive.com/post/1229785

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