Will lonely virgin men continue to increase?

DoctorWinchester87 · 2023-10-08T14:45:41+00:00

Yes, and current statistics agree with this.

I think the reasons are very complicated, but some big picture influences are: living in the post sexual revolution era, collapse of the middle class and economic instability, and the elimination of third space social interaction in favor of virtual socialization and parasocial relationships.

The sexual revolution brought with it a whole new understanding of relationships. In the past, relationships were built primarily in power dynamics and the social importance of having a family. The rich needed marriage to seal alliances and sire offspring to inherit fortunes and the poor needed marriage for financial security and to produce children to work on the farm. Companionship and love were a part of this, but there were bigger issues at play that pretty much required people to pair up. Single men were useful for military service and for low tier professions. The sexual revolution changed all this by shifting the importance of relationships to emphasizing companionship and passion. Women didn’t need men to take care of them, so physical appearance and exciting personalities started to become much more important. You can also go down the rabbit hole of how hormone birth control and antidepressants killed the sex drives of many women, but that’s a whole other story.

As for economics, the post 2000s economy has shaken a lot of people from independence and a sense of security. Relationships function best when both parties are financially secure with a decent amount of disposable income. This is why dating dynamics are very different for the upper middle class compared to the poor or working class. People are more hesitant to date or start families now due to economic uncertainty. A lot of people also are now forced to either live with parents or roommates which also makes dating more difficult. But if you’re attractive, one night stands are more beneficial because they satisfy the sexual appetite while not requiring financial investment.

Then there is the elimination of third spaces and in person interaction. Back in the day, you were limited to the number of people you could reasonably meet in a day and were geographically limited to the single people in your area. Your only options were either approaching people in public spaces or being connected by mutual friends or family. Back then, it was very common for couples to meet at laundromats, grocery stores, bars, the library, or through work/school. Now in the me too era and the overall replacement of in person interaction with the virtual, people are very hesitant to interact with others in public and it’s largely considered predatory. People have adopted a very “I’m just minding my own business” and “I don’t shit where I eat” mentality. Part of this is because women have virtually unlimited choice now online with dating apps and social media. People are more likely to add others on Snapchat or instagram, where you’re likely one of over a dozen guys trying to get with her. The over abundance of choice causes behaviors like ghosting to be rampant. This creates a feeling of apathy in many guys because the competition is too much. Less choice is often better because our brains just can’t handle that many options. It’s made people a lot pickier and has introduced trophy dating where people want the most attractive partner to show off on social media. Then you can get into the whole rabbit hole of how social skills have deteriorated and how anxiety and risk aversion is rampant in young people now.

Sorry to whip out the essay, but it seems like you wanted a detailed answer and unfortunately the answer is very complicated and nuanced. The tl;dr really just boils down to: socioeconomic and sexual dynamics have changed so rapidly in the past 50 years (and especially the past decade) that increasing numbers of men have been squeezed out of the dating market, largely because physical appearance is now the dominant factor for how many chose partners now. It’s just the way it is. A lot of guys either checked out of dating or never started because they read the writing on the wall and turned to hobbies like gaming and parasocial relationships with Internet personalities because it’s easier. Everything tends to follow the path of least resistance. Dating is simply too unrewarding and draining now. Men have also grown tired of the empty platitudes and non advice people in relationships give them.

Substantial_Video560 · 2023-10-08T15:33:29+00:00

Of course, without a doubt!

The longterm solution will be be found in the advancement of A.I. and VR. These will fill the voids.

Hubris1998 · 2023-10-08T14:05:06+00:00

Absolutely

No-Neighborhood-5851 · 2023-10-08T15:55:21+00:00

Yes, as it's harder for people, especially men, to work on themselves and make themselves more attractive and desirable. The world fucking sucks, and instead of changing expectations of men in terms of sexual experience and dating, instead, society just doubles down on the current expectations and still tells them that they're not true men if they're not having sex.

zastale · 2023-10-08T13:50:52+00:00

Yes.

BoogersAndSugar · 2023-10-08T21:33:30+00:00

Absolutely. And once these guys hit around 20% of the male population, that's when times will get interesting. It's gonna affect the economy as single males who ain't trying to "attract" someone into settling for them have very different spending behavior than the traditional norm. It's gonna affect politics as well... it'll only be a matter of time before a rogue politician plays these guys for votes.

ZookeepergameTasty12 · 2023-10-08T20:44:01+00:00

Yes. It is inevitable that the vast majority of genz males will become incels. It was always going to happen and there isnt anything that can be done to reverse this trend. As of 2022 63% of men are single. A 4% increases from the year prior. I predict it will increase until it plateaus at around 80-90%.

NoirPill · 2023-10-08T14:00:19+00:00

The reason is modern women only chasing chads. They are shallow and will reap what they sow.

its-probly-over · 2023-10-08T14:27:05+00:00

I feel like its a self correcting thing. In the past women had no choice but no marry a man. Resulting in masses of trash genes being passed on. now that women have choice they will avoid trash genes and eliminate them from existence.

Incels are just a product of the past, its a shame that its 'innocent' people that have to experience this but thats just nature and the world for you. maybe in a few hundred years shit will get better after most of the trash genetic failures get eliminated.

ProfessionalTwo8698 · 2023-10-08T16:50:00+00:00

Hoeflation

HighlyyFlashy · 2023-10-08T18:13:48+00:00

probably

elektroncloud · 2023-10-08T21:52:30+00:00

With ai gfs they might increase a little but I’d say it’ll remain stable after that

Chan_KC · 2023-10-09T09:21:11+00:00

Yes, it will continue for as long as most of these men only rely on dating apps and their social intelligence diminishes.

If you’re relying on dating apps (which gives you near impossible odds as it is) and say you finally get a match; you then have to woo over messages and try to stand out; you’d have to see how much you have in common to warrant meeting; then she had to agree to meet for a date/coffee which is risky in itself for both of you; then you’d have to hope she actually shows up.

And after all these odds, if you’re socially awkward because your in-person skills are severely lacking, your peen will still not get wet.

Just get off these stupid apps, accept rejection along the way and develop some thick skin. How you think guys only a 10-15+ years ago navigated this? These are they same men that apparently all these younger women are going for - has anyone stopped to think that one big reason for this is that age group actually have social skills developed pre-dating app era?

Your chance to meet, get to know and hit it off will increase.

2023-10-08T17:44:45+00:00

This is a good thing in my opinion as is lonely virgin men would have eachother 😊

Weekly_Signal6481 · 2023-10-08T20:28:36+00:00

As long as ya'll keep being pussies , yes it will increase

AssistTemporary8422 · 2023-10-08T18:24:15+00:00

It will probably increase due to all the screen time everyone is engaging in.

Mitago1 · 2023-10-08T17:39:42+00:00

Probably, if social norms and expectations wont radically change for men and women.

cantthinkofaname1010 · 2023-10-09T04:59:09+00:00

Social media has caused female narcissism to skyrocket. Male sexlessness starts taking off soon after instagram became prominent. There was never a point in history where ugly men had it made, but it was easier to get their need for intimacy fulfilled in the past.

bruhminer · 2023-10-09T08:08:52+00:00

Yes, obviously, I remember seeing the stats some years ago about single young men being at like 30% and people would cope and say "there is no way that this is accurate, it can't be that bad" and sure enough new data was published and the stats increased to 60%.

Are there any solutions to the problem or remedies?

Fundamentally no, most women simply are not attracted to most men.

Title	Will lonely virgin men continue to increase?
Author	chessman6500
Upvotes	28
Comments	39
Date	October 8, 2023 1:41 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/AllPillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/AllPillDebate/comments/172zg1s/will_lonely_virgin_men_continue_to_increase/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/AllPillDebate/will-lonely-virgin-men-continue-to-increase.1234407 https://theredarchive.com/post/1234407

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