The instant you show a girl too much interest, she plays hard

EARLY20RAG3R · 2022-08-14T03:56:37+00:00

This. I was texting this girl from school for a few months and everytime I set up something with her she would cancel at the last moment.

I was always the one to text her first, so I just stopped texting her altogether and she came back to me so I had to block her cause if she dont want this D someone else can get it

Sumbuddyonce · 2022-08-14T13:12:09+00:00

Sometimes you think they're playing hard to get but they're actually just kinda awkward

bandsupjay · 2022-08-14T06:26:41+00:00

[permanently deleted]

CocoBabeNYC · 2022-08-14T04:01:39+00:00

One thing guys need to understand. The second a woman figures out she's "gotten" you, meaning there is nothing she can do for you to lose interest because you are in hook, line and sinker, she will immediately lose interest in you. You are no longer a challenge or someone she has to win over by pursuing you.

shusain2991 · 2022-08-14T03:32:37+00:00

Yes you are right..... If you show too much interest, she will play hard. If you show little less interest, she will move on to another. The only way to deal with this is never depend on one girl. You have to constantly date multiple girls at a time.

HomeMadeWhiskey · 2022-08-14T11:42:03+00:00

In short, you need to do stuff to her emotions before you allow her to do stuff to your emotions.

A lot of it is a mental issue from the man's side. We tend to go into altered states when we see attractive women.

Meeting women, good looking or not, will gives us a second impression different to our first. Sometimes the hot looking women have terrible personalities that turn us off. Sometimes women who aren't objectively good looking manage to turn us on! So don't trust your first instincts.

What we really have to do is not spook ourselves out with women. They're all different, and they don't have a hive mind. Approach them with the attitude of "let's see what happens" and then ...well... see what happens.

The second thing is to learn to get women addicted to good emotional states in your presence. Ask yourself, if you were a woman, what sort of feelings and body sensations would you be having if you were around a man that turned you on? THAT'S what you need to be talking about with women, and subtly telling them to feel in your presence while not overtly drawing attention to yourself of commanding her.

So you would say something like: "Have you ever met a guy, and for the first time felt an inexplicable sense of attraction for this person?"... meanwhile you're standing right in front of her!

Rather than focusing on your own feelings of lust - which will make you nervous or overly show interest or compliment her - focus rather on talking to her about the things that will turn her on and stimulate her imagination and feelings of lust she keeps somewhere in her mind.

When you go fishing, you put worms on the hook - because the fish like worms, not because you do.

It's a battle for who controls the frame. Either you set the frame and turn her on, or you allow your feelings for her - unwarranted and unrequited - take over and let her set the frame - which she will then walk all over you with.

LaxFox · 2022-08-14T11:00:41+00:00

I know this is the seduction sub and not dating advice sub, but how quickly do you find this changes as you decide to be serious with someone?

Conformist5589 · 2022-08-14T05:47:42+00:00

She’s basically seeing how high she can set up the hoops you’ll be jumping through later.

itizwhatitizlmao · 2022-08-14T14:02:25+00:00

It’s literally the same for men.

I have to “wait” for him to approach me. To text me. To plan dates.

I can’t text him or double text him first. I can’t call him. Can’t show too much enthusiasm. Can’t ask to be taken on dates. Can’t be too available.

Women are not all the same and men are not all the same but this is just the current reality of dating for EVERYBODY…

loticanautica · 2022-08-14T04:04:44+00:00

I feel like guys go from 0-100 real quick some times who’s wouldn’t be stand offish

sincere_blasphemy · 2022-08-14T14:50:33+00:00

I think your problem might just be that you are coming on too hard to her. If you text all the time and it’s not in equal balance to what she’s doing, it can feel pushy and needy. And pretty much everyone runs away from that.

VanillaCider2021 · 2022-08-14T22:14:42+00:00

I think it is all relative. If a girl likes you the it doesn't matter what you do.

This pertains more for women who may be on the fence at the beginning. Then yes, you can come on too strong.

zisehuar · 2022-08-15T00:59:52+00:00

Yeah I hear you. It can be hard for girls, too. When you really like someone but can't show it or they'll take you for granted. In my experience though, the guys who show interest consistently are the ones who win. Girls tend to wait if you flake or not. So yes, don't be needy, but show that you really like her by planning dates etc.

Elkhunter3000 · 2022-08-14T09:31:46+00:00

While this is true, as a man I feel the need to point out that the same is true for me as well. Socially speaking I am not in a good situation these days with very few friends and 0 romantic chances anywhere, but there was a time I was more active. As soon as I felt that some girl was eager, I lost interest and gamed on elsewhere. I feel like it is really just a matter of economics. Great demand, high price. That switch can be flipped almost instantly.

NiNj4_C0W5L4Pr · 2022-08-14T10:39:40+00:00

You've discovered the pickup paradox.

show a girl too much interest, she plays hard

You just demonstrated that she has more value than you. She's not "playing hard", you've simply given away all your "power & value" and she is no longer intrigued or attracted.

Women do not sleep with men whom they deem to have lower value than themselves (exception being: revenge against a cheating bf/husband or severe self esteem issues).

Pro Tip: act like you are the prize and get her to treat you as high value. If you don't know how to do that this sub isn't for you. Go do some HW & come back when you've got this down.

RideTheRim · 2022-08-14T13:50:40+00:00

The worst part of the whole song and dance

DrinksAreOnTheHouse · 2022-08-14T17:51:47+00:00

Not if she likes you more.

hkgrjdjsksxhmhkdsmse · 2022-08-14T18:07:20+00:00

And is turned off.

Calamity__Bane · 2022-08-14T20:59:20+00:00

Unfortunate, but often true.

debu206 · 2022-08-15T08:40:29+00:00

Damn straight. Women love to chase.

do not text more than setting up date and confirmation.

Do not reveal too much. Reveal only what you would to a stranger.

theKnightWatchman44 · 2022-08-14T14:26:02+00:00

Even an obese woman with nothing attractive about her has many many options above her league, all women can do this nowadays and it's not the flex they think it is.

Tbeckelman98 · 2022-08-14T16:51:28+00:00

It’s a test to see your willingness, just keep trying. That phase only lasts so long. Then if she likes you, she’ll then be all in

Fontenele71 · 2022-08-14T19:01:19+00:00

Or, you know, she is just not interested in dating you? Not everything is a game as you people seem to think

Deep-Advice7587 · 2022-08-14T19:12:34+00:00

Well, why do you give that much focus? Do you see her as a human being like the rest of the world or like someone to conquer?

Particular-Pop-2484 · 2022-08-14T21:31:37+00:00

If initiating contact is putting her off she was never interested in you in the first place. I’ll have to say that I never was bothered by a man I liked texting me. There’s a balance of course, don’t blow me up and personally I don’t like to text all day everyday but like I said… I’ve never been bothered by a text from someone I liked and usually if I’m annoyed that they text me … is how I figured out I don’t like them

Funny_Extension5610 · 2022-08-14T22:45:31+00:00

Take adderall. The goal oriented focus and lack of empathy or any real emotion will allow you to attract her more effortlessly. Your neediness will come through. Alcohol in very moderate use can help with anxiety and boost confidence. But use sparingly

Title	The instant you show a girl too much interest, she plays hard
Author	Zhaorenli
Upvotes	115
Comments	44
Date	August 14, 2022 1:44 AM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/wnuccl/the_instant_you_show_a_girl_too_much_interest_she/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/the-instant-you-show-a-girl-too-much-interest-she.1252116 https://theredarchive.com/post/1252116

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