[deleted by user]

willgo-waggins · 2022-06-07T01:57:52+00:00

I would venture to say that the fact that you grew up with four brothers as (I assume) the only girl has a lot to do with this. You are used to being in a male dominated environment and forcing them to look at you as “one of the boys” to compete for even equal attention.

It’s remarkably similar to my girl but more extreme. She grew up as the baby sister with two much older, much bigger and more accomplished (in her eyes, I know this is not true) big brothers. And she has learned to relate to men most of the time in a one of the guys manner as she has also become an accomplished athlete as a way to carve out her space and attention in the family.

And it’s mot being non feminine, not interested in guys or not able to get them. On the contrary she is beautiful and sexy and interacts easily and well and is social. But she tends to have a “guy” perspective/attitude and this puts a lot of guys off and also most women (she has few women friends and I’ll bet that you don’t either).

Try to look objectively at how you interact and what you are projecting in your communication with men. That may well help. And notch down the assertiveness a few levels. Guys can handle a certain amount in certain situations. But it iTALiA an incredibly strong and confident and experienced personality in a man to be comfortable with and handle that in a woman all the time or coming at you full bore.

Hope this helps you some.

_0neTwo_ · 2022-06-07T01:57:39+00:00

"blunt" "cold" "intense" "intimidating" "tomboy"

Are you perhaps stoic in your facial expressions? Maybe try smiling more or try to be more warm and expressive? Are you short (not physically) and sarcastic in a lot of your responses? Try smirking or winking with your jokes maybe and don't be extra abrasive but joking around/teasing is good.

I remember I was chatting with a girl at a party who came off very serious and deadpan. It was hard to tell what she was joking about vs. what was meaningful to her. It wasn't fun trying to talk to her (I like to joke and tease) and I lost interest which made her continued attempts to chat me up a bit awkward.

hoodbgoode · 2022-06-07T02:55:38+00:00

Femininity

Smile, giggle, show enthusiasm

Trabalhomesmo · 2022-06-07T02:20:37+00:00

I can say to you, men are idiots. We have some trouble to see the obvious sometimes. Give him some hints. Its like a dance. You move, he moves. It may be dificult in the beggining, but you will start enjoying it in no time.

incognito3107 · 2022-06-07T04:26:32+00:00

Well, as you have spent much time with your brothers, you may have got an impression that guys prefer logical, straightforward, emotionless interaction. But that is definitely not the case for guys that are looking for a partner in a girl, we actually crave many feminine characteristics like slightly emotional, intuitional, bit irrational, kind, sensitive, gentle etc.

ZachMoore88 · 2022-06-07T01:18:16+00:00

Laugh at what he says....even if it's not funny

shared0 · 2022-06-07T00:52:42+00:00

There's an app called tinder.

stanthemilkman88 · 2022-06-07T01:59:53+00:00

Smile more?

ftdrain · 2022-06-07T03:34:23+00:00

Its literally too fucking easy for girls, if they are attracted to you, all you have to do is keep talking to them, if they dont bite, call them handsome or a similar compliment, they will get the hint and go from there. Shit is so easy it annoys me (assuming you are decently attractive in the first place, if you are not, you are fucked, "hot guys" have good options)

creamyturtle · 2022-06-07T02:09:20+00:00

you sound awesome, like a breath of fresh air. sounds like these little boys don't know how to talk to an actual woman who isnt pretending

morticiaerotica · 2022-06-07T04:10:57+00:00

I have autism and am very blunt, stoic, and un affectionate (until I know you). I also have 7 brothers. I have to remember to listen and show I’m listening to other people in conversation even if I’m bored or don’t like the topic and to smile periodically so I don’t freak people out. However, my boyfriend loves the “tsudere”/Aubrey Plaza via Parks and Rec - basically being super icy/deadpan to everyone but very warm to him. I’m caught between telling you to teach yourself these cues or just holding out for someone because someone will like it. But it seems like remembering some social cues or hints /lines that you’ve seen other people pull off is the answer that will help you most. Good luck!

WanyCaleb · 2022-06-07T04:45:57+00:00

Have you tried our Lord and savior, da gym? Also, practice, practice and practice talking/flirting.

Connect-Pear-3859 · 2022-06-07T08:43:58+00:00

Just say, what's a nice guy like you doing in a place like this?

Title	[deleted by user]
Author	[deleted]
Upvotes	59
Comments	39
Date	June 7, 2022 12:28 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/v6hxou/i_dont_know_how_to_flirt_or_talk_to_guys/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/deleted-by-user.1257757 https://theredarchive.com/post/1257757

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