What Makes A Bad First Date

ThrowawayPUA · 2011-08-29T16:50:51+00:00

Yeah, I liked that point about covert. I recall an mPUA talking about ASD, "no girl want to be seen being seduced. She thinks it makes her look promiscuous."

oh_heeey_flip · 2011-08-29T22:04:50+00:00

Wow!

Every date I've ever had violated some of these rules. I'd take a girl to a nice dinner, or I'd call her up and tell her I'm going to see a new flick, but the money and the lack of conversation and kino are now blatantly apparent. Good thing I am now a huge coffee fanatic, so that'll end up being my new date of choice.

Thanks, OP!

RedPosterboard · 2011-08-29T15:02:21+00:00

With all the blowouts I'm getting on dates these days it seems like they are all bad first dates.

However, one thing that has helped me tremendously is applying structure to my numerous dates. Until just about ten months ago I never thought along those lines and took girls all sorts of weird places... only, I never did manage to take that many of them... ;)

This great article gives some solid guidelines on how you should NOT run your dates. Favorite quotation:

"A bad first date is a first date that violates any of our 5 Cs of Dating:

It's not cheap

It's not convenient

It's not conducive to conversation

It's not covert

You're not in control / calling the shots".

fakebaby · 2011-08-29T17:27:03+00:00

Eye opener.

heckz · 2011-08-29T22:36:38+00:00

I agree with the five C's but maybe doing something fun can be added to the list.

nomdeanon · 2011-08-29T17:55:33+00:00

I didn't read the article, but I'd say phrasing anything as a "date" stacks the deck against you. I haven't been on a "date" in the past 10 years, but have been with many women.

I always phrase things as a "meeting". The word "date" invokes far too many rules, many of which are unwritten, and sets really high expectations for the guy.

bradtwo · 2011-08-29T20:48:31+00:00

Agree with RedPosterboard, My first date requirement is always just going out and having a walk and talking. A: its free to do that, so theres no monetary loss B: It gives you a chance to convey your personality.

jamesh777 · 2011-08-29T23:18:41+00:00

30$ a ticket is too expensive? Wtf?

RP-on-AF1 · 2011-08-29T23:56:41+00:00

I'm a bit confused on the bit about losing attraction once you fall into the early-boyfriend role. If she wants a boyfriend, why would that be bad?

eyeothemastodon · 2011-08-30T01:02:59+00:00

I've been away from material for a while, been having fun in my own style this summer, but this was a very interesting read and really hits home to my experiences. Definitely going to remember the 5C's

lod001 · 2011-08-30T04:23:30+00:00

Good advice, but stupid failed examples. Two of the failed examples were of dates that were planned by the girl. He claims that he was at fault for not following the C's but I think the girls were at fault since they were the ones pursuing the guy. He is too hard on himself for failures that he couldn't plan for. (I guess that means lack of control, but if you aren't setting up the plans for the date, I think you should just relax and enjoy the outing.)

AegisSC · 2011-08-30T04:26:51+00:00

Great read/

WolfInTheField · 2011-08-29T22:40:54+00:00

So fucking saved. Just went on a day-2 with a girl i really liked, logistics and control got so fucked up... She had a friend of hers join us, who turned out to be her boyfriend :P Ah well, guess I'm going sarging tomorrow.

Title	What Makes A Bad First Date
Author	RedPosterboard
Upvotes	96
Comments	32
Date	August 29, 2011 2:54 PM UTC (14 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/jy03f/what_makes_a_bad_first_date/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/what-makes-a-bad-first-date.1321855 https://theredarchive.com/post/1321855

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