Or as I like to call it, a "social compass".

For most of us, we know that there's guys that "get it" and guys who don't. And for the guys that don't, they're constantly putting themselves down and trying to find any sort of PUA method to get them back into the game. This is where the go wrong.

Now, by "getting it" I'm referring to men who:

  • Understand female body language, and know how to react to it
  • Can talk calmly to women, and other men they haven't met
  • Know the "dos" and "dont's" of social play, and personal space.

There's definitely more of a list, but I'm trying to be concise. Now, I'm probably wanting to aim this piece at men who don't get it, as they're the ones that need the most assistance. As I said earlier, it takes time to develop a social radar, it can be the difference that helps you understand when women are just being friendly, or are actually flirting with you. It is the difference between a drink in the face, and a naughty laugh from a risqué comment you just made about her.

For the guys that feel they just don't get it, and have many failed attempts with women, or even none at all - you need to understand that just because you're failing with your approach, it doesn't mean it's all her, or all you. I'm just kidding, it's all you. You've probably heard this over and over in PUA forums, but it's said for a reason. You always need to begin with yourself before you start dealing with the outside world. PUA isn't just for getting girls, in fact, it's not even PUA you should be focusing on right now. Your focus should be you. It's all in you right now. Everything. All your decisions are your choice, I hope. So begin with the basics:

  • Hygiene
  • Clothes
  • Intelligence/Wit/Humour
  • Being interesting

Do your research, you'll see what is popular in most Men's magazines, or all across Tumblr. Hell, even search Tumblr tags for "hot guys" - this may sound odd, but it's a quick way to see what women want.

I know some of this information is generic to most of you, but it's repeated because it's important. Be clean, be sharp and be interesting. Aim for at least 2/3 of these before you head out. Women will judge you before you get the chance to say a word, so you want to be visually stimulating, right? SHARP. Be it

Pop quiz: Ask yourself right now: "Am I interesting?"

So, you're looking better than before, you've gotten a haircut that suits your face, you're wearing clothes that fit and you've overall improved your state of mind and your projected image of yourself. People will notice, especially your regular friends - don't be worried if they're shocked or taken back, possibly even offended. It just happens because of change, people like their friends being the same - it's a trap!

Anyway, you're looking MUCH better. Well done.

You'll now need to start your research onto body language (not just female, we're talking general) and how to walk away from social interaction feeling that you've made a good impression. Borrow or buy some books on body language, so you know what's negative and what is positive - beware, there are many conflicting signs in body language, it's all based on context.

Your aim is to be fully aware of your interactions, as well as trying to manage a conversation. This applies to not just females. You're going to meet guys that you may genuinely like, and want to be friends with. Notice how people react when you say certain things, or when you approach a stranger and how their stance may shift to either welcome you, or avoid you.

We need to calibrate you. Watch films that showcase men with social flair, style and confidence. Of course James Bond films are great, any of the leading men in Hollywood have it down pat. But they're just actors, and they've spent years perfecting this. You want to be you (Oh no, did you really just say that?) Yes. Now, I hate when people say "Just be you" because it's reinforcing the idea of "Hey, don't change - I'm used to you how you are, I wish you all the best, and by being you, you don't have to put any effort in" - Disregard this. You want to be you, of course, you are you - But be the best version of you. Ever had that voice in your head say "Well, you probably should be doing this right now - hey, are you sure that's a good idea?" That's the better version of you trying to help out.

I feel like I've lost track here, but, I'm trying to stay on point.

To summarise, I just want you guys to work on you first. Find your style, but apply the general things over the top that are known to work (being clean/sharp/interesting). Being interesting is a hard one, but it's as simple as pursuing the things you love, and being able to talk about them with passion.

I know I don't have any credibility, but I know what's worked over the years, and I've witnessed way too many guys fail. And it's always easy to talk to a girl about how the guy who just hit on her failed miserably.

I feel that I can elaborate further on things, but I didn't want this to be any more of a bigger post than it is.

I'll answer any questions I can, I may not have the answers, but I feel I've got some knowledge worth sharing.

All the best guys.

PS. I haven't bothered rereading this, so here's to hoping there's not too many errors.