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[–]RandomTasked 103 points104 points105 points 11 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
Was expecting to see something about "GET OVER HERE"
[–][deleted] 42 points43 points44 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Good point.
I should be downvoted for this.
[–]MastrolindoX 8 points9 points10 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
COME HERE!
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago* (0 children) | Copy Link
What is this?
[–]Indianbro 24 points25 points26 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Literally just got drop kicked. Saw cute girl sitting by herself on her laptop. Hesitated long enough for another random guy to go up and approach her. That was a huge punch to the stomach. Not happening tomorrow.
[–][deleted] 11 points12 points13 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
No worries.
Approach the next one and you won't even remember this experience. Stay consistent though.
[–]MastrolindoX 16 points17 points18 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This is TOASTY!
[–]ImperialMix 24 points25 points26 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
If you do get the girl in bed you better FINISH HER or you may end up in FRIENDSHIP or worse a fatality where she tears out your spine and stomps on your dick while she uppercuts your corpse onto acid tipped spikes that blow up your heart. But seriously good on you for not caring of the outcome first and foremost. All you have to do now is learn to counter a woman's defensive blocking and flips so you can show her your special maneuvers.
[–]StylePrevails 25 points26 points27 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
And use a jimmy or you'll end up with a babality.... Sorry
[–]doubledip10 6 points7 points8 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
That is awesome what a great step! Now you just have to integrate it into your life. You don't need to set aside time where you are "in game" or sarging. You are always in game, you are always dressed well and have your eyes peeled for opportunity. Always be prepared with a witty comment and an opener. After you get there then you can just live your life, with continuous great game...in the seduction world we call this a natural.
[–][deleted] 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Thanks man!
This where I want to be.
[–]abandonliberty 6 points7 points8 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
The most vicious rejection I've ever had was from the ugliest girl I ever approached. I hadn't seen her face, my friend told me to open her so I did. I was as shocked by her rancid face as I was by her brutal judgmental expression.
It was awesome.
[–]kryptonyk 4 points5 points6 points 11 years ago (3 children) | Copy Link
Nice. Out of curiosity, how'd it go once you got the numbers? I have a harder time going from number to hangout than I do getting the number.
[–][deleted] 13 points14 points15 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Honestly for me its gone pretty well as of late.
I'll outline what I'm doing differently for you...
I'm talking slower. When I get nervous I talk fast.
My goal is to be interested not interesting (watch Nick Sparks' speech on approaching and conversation on YouTube). Helped me more than anything I've ever read or listened to.
I don't ask for the number. Usually I close with something like this..."Hey you seem really cool but I have to run. We should go on a date though. I'm free Thursday night and Sunday during the day."
Be assumptive and get a commitment. This is a technique I use in sales that has helped me tremendously with getting dates.
Now, I by no means consider myself great at this. Quite the opposite. But this has worked well for me.
[–]mrsaturdayknight2 points 11 years ago [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
Thanks so much for this Nick Sparks video, its amazing.
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Changed my life.
Glad you enjoyed it. I promise if you put it into practice it'll pay off.
[–]elili 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (8 children) | Copy Link
I approach a lot now. 3-7 every weekday. And 20-50 on the weekends
so on a slow week you approach what? 45 women? sorry if I ask but what are you gettin out of this? I mean, do you want to get laid? just looking for contacts? a girlfriend?
[–][deleted] 13 points14 points15 points 11 years ago* (7 children) | Copy Link
I suffer from social anxiety. My goal is to get over that. And then ultimately teach confidence to people who suffer from SA as well. Sure I want to get laid, what guy doesn't? But that's not my primary motivation.
Aside from practicing pick up I meditate, I've become a member of Toastmasters, I participate in support groups for shyness and social anxiety, as well as read and listen to lectures about confidence and social anxiety. I work 9-5, work out every other day, spend 2-3 nights a week with friends, and try to go one one or two dates a week.
Moral of the story is you can approach this many women in a week and still get a lot accomplished. Doesn't take that much effort
[–]nith12 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Do you feel approaching is helping you overcome SA in general? You mentioned before that you still get AA - has it lessened at all? Do you get it but feel like you can cope with it better?
[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
For me meditation and excersize also helps with SA. These activities have helped me gain confidence internally. It is difficult for extraneous negativity to affect you when you are at peace and comfortable in your own skin.
When I say AA I mean that feeling you get in the pit of your stomach. In that moment is when your flight or fight response kicks in.
If your entire life you have not acted in that moment you have to train yourself to react. That's what approaching has done for me.
So that feeling doesn't go away you just learn to harness it.
[–]elili 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
very inspiring, so you're playing a numbers game. I respect that, it would be interesting to focus on the next step then, since approaching doesn't seem to be a problem anymore, starting dating with these women seems like the logical step
you know, I went to the gym today and thought about this thread, there were dozens of H-O-T women, and all I cant think of is "im really sweaty" "Fuck I didnt shave today" "Well there are bigger guys than me here..."
So basically Raiden slamed me to the wall senseless... grats to you though!
Well I have been dating that's not an issue.
Approaching is still in a issue though in that I can't do it in any situation. I'm still uncomfortable approaching groups for instance. But I'm working on it.
Thanks for the kind words. The fact that you remembered this in that moment means a lot to me. Hopefully next time it will prompt you to act. Best of luck!
[–]Strike48 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
How do you find anxiety groups like that.
I use meetup.com
Pretty big in NYC.
But you can also just Google "social anxiety support groups" in your city and I'm sure you'll find some stuff.
[–]remarkedvial 4 points5 points6 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Because when you lose you literally get your still-beating heart torn out of your chest?!
[–][deleted] 3 points4 points5 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
lost it at not Asian enough/too Asian
[–]etcomro 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Love this.
[–]NightmarishPT 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Lou Kang?
LOL
Fixed.
"normal is boring" best part of your post for sure.
[–]Not2original 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
I like the analogy! You make some good points, and I'm happy that is what works for you, I may adopt this as well.
[–]litt_up 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
This is awesome advice. I do great on weekends, literally the most social guy in the group most if not all of the time. Problem is, I subconsciously configure my brain to think that fridays and saturdays are the only times to be social. For example, earlier today as I was walking from my car to my building carrying water, a girl passes in front of me, looks at me for a second then quickly looks away. Didn't even catch eye contact, whatever. Thought she wasn't interested since she looked away so quickly. Walking behind her for about 20 second, then she turns around, smiles at me and waits for me to smile back or say something, I just freeze up. I wasn't in the social mindset and wasn't prepared for that response. This was right at the turn to my building so I didn't even have time to say anything after she did that. Sad thing is that she initiated that one, it was basically a dead giveaway.
She lives in the building over so all hope is not lost, but I'm going to take this advice and try to run more day game.
Dude seek her out and go up to her.
Tell her you saw her and didn't know what to say. Don't be afraid to be vulnerable. People appreciate that. Especially women. Even if she rejects you you'll be glad you took action.
And if you're worried about it being weird after just smile at her next time you see her. Its only weird if you let it be. Show her you don't care and she won't either.
[–]OcarinaBigBoiLink 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
As a huge MK fan, this is kinda neat and a fun way to look at it. Thanks for the confidence boost!
[–]Strike48 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Damn this makes it very relatable to gamers. Nice write up.
[–]masterrod 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (6 children) | Copy Link
Overtime I hope you graduate to sorting as well as approaching. Good deal.
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (5 children) | Copy Link
Can you explain sorting to me?
Surprised I've never heard of this.
[–]masterrod 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (4 children) | Copy Link
I think there's another term for it.. I forget though..
It's a matter of determining the girls you go after, and what your success rate will be not base don looks.
For example, if a lady is ultra hot but enthralled in a deep conversation with her friends, and you choose not to approach her, you haven't lost anything.
If you get a number from a girl, but you find out she's otherwise occupied, so you decide not to call some other chick. You haven't lost on the girl that's occupied.
Or as you talk to a girl, you next her because she's not fitting your criteria in a conversation, even though she might be ultra interested in you and attractive.
Sorting is about assessing the target early, and maximizing successes.
[–]kagayaki 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Sounds like qualification.
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Interesting...
For instance I've started approaching girls and, while I'll always go for the number, I won't always text because I didn't find them that desirable after talking with them.
Is this sort of what you're talking about?
[–]masterrod 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Something like that, but the reason is the most important. You should get better so that in the conversation you don't even bother asking for the number, so you just sort her away.
Frankly I wouldn't text girls you meet on the street, just call them.
Something like that, it's a complicated as you let it be. The end goal is to maximizes your successes.
Thanks!
[–]blaintopel 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
Is mortal kombat the first fighting game most people think of? Ive always thought it would be street fighter.
[–][deleted] 2 points3 points4 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
Mortal Kombat lends to better puns. As evidenced in the comments.
Good work all around by everyone on that front btw.
[–]epileftric 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
related
I can't do this at high school. Maybe I can with the girl who has a crush on me at work, but I'm still scared of rejection. What if all those selfies she forced me to take, joking with me everyday, forcing conversation from me (I'm an introvert), and laughing at all my jokes just means she was being friendly? I know I need to step out of my comfort zone, but up until this point, I barley talk to her, she does all the talking. If I suddenly change or ask for her number after acting disinterested, she might lose feelings.
[–]jdepps113 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago* (1 child) | Copy Link
You can do this at high school.
Ever notice how the coolest kids are the ones who just assume they are cool? They aren't afraid to talk to anyone. They act like they belong. They aren't afraid of your opinion, and if they gave your opinion of them much thought (which they don't) they'd assume it's favorable. If they like a person, they assume they have a shot and go try and talk to that person.
It's entirely possible to say that you, personally, aren't ready or comfortable with acting like this in high school. I can believe that; and it can be hard to break free from old habits when everyone knows you as acting a certain way.
But that's entirely different from saying it can't be done. It can. Other kids are doing it in your high school right now.
EDIT: Also! You cannot let your fear of ONE GIRL let you stay in a shell, thinking if you act differently she'll lose feelings for you. You can't even let fear of a lot of people do that, but doing it for one person is especially ridiculous.
Stop worrying about how other people will react. It's a dumb way to live (although trust me, I've been there).
I just really like her. I know you are right, but I don't want to accept it. I will try to meditate on that, though. Also, in high school, rumors of rejections spread fast, and I don't want to be that guy. I have no problem in public (well, less of a problem), but I'm constantly working in my confidence, so I'll work on this, too. Thanks!
[–][deleted] 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
[permanently deleted]
Thanks for the contribution.
I'm definitely going to check this book out.
[–]olivedoesntrhyme 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (2 children) | Copy Link
dude, why did you delete this, it was a fantastic post!
[–][deleted] 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
But I didn't delete anything. At least not intentionally. The main post still shows for me.
[–]olivedoesntrhyme 0 points1 point2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
it's saying [removed] for me?
[–]Wolfengristl1 points 11 years ago [recovered] (2 children) | Copy Link
What resources are available for some solid daygame techniques? Anybody have links?
[–]doubledip10 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
Day game is my preference. I would recommend being active and having a line up of activities for your day, shopping at the mall, coffee at a cafe next to a college campus, a beer at a popular bar during happy hour, finish it off with a couple groceries. During this you can scout and just approach based on what the girl is doing. I am a big fan of cold reading, or comment on what they are wearing or doing. The guard is down and its easy to make a good impression.
[–]Gishu -1 points0 points1 point 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
What the fuck did i just read?
[–][deleted] -3 points-2 points-1 points 11 years ago (1 child) | Copy Link
I'm confused...all the "good" players of any fighting game have taught me that playing a slower, responsive game is usually best, especially for older titles like Street Fighter and Mortal Kombat. You should wait for the opponent to come to you and then have an attack prepares. The over-eager rush into battle and get countered and destroyed.
So yeah, that kinda derails the whole analogy.
[–]toughbutworthit 1 point2 points3 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
he meant gaming health bars in general
[–]Fuck_of_m8 -4 points-3 points-2 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
*Why OP is a virgin
[+]Lead ModeratorThrowawayPUA -7 points-6 points-5 points 11 years ago (0 children) | Copy Link
This is a poor metaphor and is dehumanizing. You can't develop positive relationships with women, while viewing them as a video game.
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[–]RandomTasked 103 points104 points105 points (4 children) | Copy Link
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[–]mrsaturdayknight2 points [recovered] (1 child) | Copy Link
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