When did this become the “how to I reply to this” sub?

WIA20XX · 2019-07-12T14:13:27+00:00

Smartphones, social media, and tinder/dating apps.

Yamatoman9 · 2019-07-12T14:43:05+00:00

That's supposed to be what r/askseddit is for but more and more of those posts end up on the this sub.

I understand there are a lot of inexperienced and younger posters here, but there has been a noticeable shift in quality of the posts here in the last couple of years. It seems like there are a lot more posts like: "I'm such a loser. No one will ever like me. Have pity of me".

tighttritenight · 2019-07-12T17:59:16+00:00

Yep. If you have to ask other people "How do I reply to this?", you've already lost. If your internal dialogue is "What should I say to make her want me?", you've already lost. If you're talking to a woman, and you agree with something she says because you're afraid of turning her off even though you don't really agree with her, you've already lost. Women are attracted to men who are genuine and confident, and you can't be either of those if you are constantly in your own head trying to win a chess match that only you are playing. If something you say does turn her off, consider yourself lucky because it means you're incompatible. Move on to the next girl.

It takes time to develop this mindset, and it only comes after putting yourself out there, taking risks, failing, and sometimes succeeding. It's a numbers game. I promise you that this girl isn't nearly as special and unique as you think she is. If you have her number, it means she's attracted to you which means other women will find you attractive as well. If you aren't afraid to take a loss, you're going to start winning a lot more.

Paltenburg · 2019-07-12T14:19:12+00:00

I might be an effect of the following:

I feel this sub has kinda lost it's general sense of direction, and/or otherwise active participation. I'd love it if we got it together a bit more, make it a bit more of a community. I don't have time for it myself, but maybe others do.

Screechez · 2019-07-12T16:03:45+00:00

Someone had to say it

SpentitinGenoa · 2019-07-12T15:55:28+00:00

Nobody interacts in the real world anymore or is open to meeting people or spending time with them outside of their smartphone group

zaratustra27 · 2019-07-12T17:46:44+00:00

First, those posts are explicitly against the rules and people should read them before posting.

Mods should delete those kinds of posts, too.

The rules are very visible on the sidebar

And talking about the sidebar, there were some links at it that covered the basics and that should be mandatory to read before posting, too. Bring the basics back.

Ice666White · 2019-07-12T15:20:01+00:00

For those who are hopeless with message game, I have this guide that I hope will put an end to all the 'what do i say next' crap. https://docs.google.com/document/d/1_WDDWbBBd5qf5OOI1sfwViMlpGb03-hkfBTmR5DHjjw/edit?usp=sharing

smoothmax · 2019-07-12T15:32:45+00:00

I was totally with you on this. I used to skip any thread with a subject like that but now I'm thinking it's good practice for me to check out the "what should I reply" threads and try to figure out what the response should be.

MrMemper · 2019-07-12T23:26:22+00:00

This sort of thing reeks of askholes. Asking question after question, gaining buckets of responses sometimes. But it comes down to one thing: taking your balls out and taking action.

So what if said dweeb gets all his dumb questions answered. What if he gets a dialogue going? What if he gets a date? Then what? What will he DO when it’s time to get away from a screen and truly interact.

All these inexperienced youngins need to get their noses out of the screen thinking google has the answer to dating and get to talking to women. Fail. Fail some more and keep going, keep learning from experience and grow.

Afraid to fail and feel shitty? Well there’s plenty of content on xvideos for ya.

tramplemestilsken · 2019-07-12T15:38:22+00:00

I see your point, but I still want to know the best way to reply this.

2019-07-12T17:44:40+00:00

Because as you said, a lot of us are inexperienced. With such inexperience comes and overwhelming mountain of information that we can’t remember on the spot as we’re talking to a girl. If we don’t say or do the right thing then boom, ghosted, and then we’re still left inexperienced and no clue what we did wrong, likely to repeat the same mistake with the next woman because we have no feedback.

TomissJesserfon · 2019-07-12T19:18:03+00:00

When it opened?

folasanmi · 2019-07-12T21:28:48+00:00

Fellas you guys are making the game hard on yourself. Women are easy you make it hard

dani098 · 2019-07-12T22:05:13+00:00

“HhoW tOo procEeedd”

fugax_Caesar · 2019-07-12T23:18:52+00:00

Moment of realisation over here deletes Tinder

MrMemper · 2019-07-12T23:20:48+00:00

Talking to actual people in meatspace is real game. Talking to someone on Instagram is just a game.

wahoos1000 · 2019-07-12T23:33:41+00:00

How the hell do I unsubscribe???

sacbite · 2019-07-13T04:36:53+00:00

I've never seduced anyone successfully, but I've rarely been without a girlfriend or wife. I'm not sure if that's good or bad.

SyrusDrake · 2019-07-13T12:21:03+00:00

I understand why it might be annoying but I can also relate. If a girl ever showed interest in me and we started texting, I also wouldn't want to mess up. I know many guys here can just afford to mess up and see it as a lesson learned. But that's not true fro everyone. If it's your only shot in years, you want it to land.

meltboro · 2019-07-12T17:52:06+00:00

When did this sub become the soapbox sub? Id rather have legitimate questions than whiny soapbox gatekeeping threads

ahjota · 2019-07-12T17:32:10+00:00

Because tech made some of them beta.

13ananaMan · 2019-07-12T17:55:21+00:00

Alright OP, I posted a question yesterday on here asking for general advice about what to do in a current situation. As a pretty experienced guy, there's still some shit I'm learning to this day and want advice about what to do. I think that if you don't ask questions and get better, you stay the same and don't grow. Nobody knows everything, and as someone that's been doing pick up for a while now, saying "Don't ask questions. Don't be afraid of rejection" is a lot easier after you've had sex with 20 girls than someone who's only gotten laid once. People want to optimize their chances. Why does that upset you?

BenzDriverS · 2019-07-12T21:29:15+00:00

If you want to have any real success with women use the phone for logistics only and make your best pitch in person.

XxPgMkIlLeR123xX · 2019-07-12T16:26:17+00:00

When you don't have any experience, nothing to say, it's not about insecurity and desperation. It's about "what do I even say", "how do I interact". At the beginning, asking people this kind of stuff is the best way to put yourself in the right mindset, because when you say the things that you were supposed to say if you were experienced (confidence comes from experience), it helps "feeling" the mindset, feeling what is right, and therefore when you want to say something else, you'll feel when it's right or wrong because now you have some experience to rely on.

Title	When did this become the “how to I reply to this” sub?
Author	quinnmcd
Upvotes	188
Comments	58
Date	July 12, 2019 1:57 PM UTC (7 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/ccb6m0/when_did_this_become_the_how_to_i_reply_to_this/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/when-did-this-become-the-how-to-i-reply-to-this.1473552 https://theredarchive.com/post/1473552

Comments