The general perception of casual dating is highly dark tainted

leosandlattes · 2024-04-22T07:00:06+00:00

Most people do not sleep around like that, yes.

What happens is that they are typically searching for an LTR partner and they multi-date, or go on dates with a few people and see who they are compatible with the most. It’s the people who are in the dating scene but are not explicitly searching for the one-and-only, marriage candidate type of thing.

I would say multi-dating is almost a necessity in dating cultures that are dominated by OLD. You meet a stranger, text for a bit, and set up a low stakes date to get to know each other and see if you hit it off. And people typically do this with multiple others.

Anecdotally I have noticed that people who date via irl social circle do not really casually date that way. My boyfriend, for example, already knew the kind of person I was which led him to ask me out. From the beginning we invested all of our time and effort into each other. And it has been like that for all my past relationships as well, as I exclusively date men in my social circles.

wtknight · 2024-04-23T00:28:55+00:00

Most of it is made of people genuinely liking each other having a good vibe at the moment and the casual aspect comes from different reasons.

A lot of it from men using game and putting on masks to appeal to women more and then ghosting them. Some of it comes from women just wanting a good time and perhaps a man catching feels for later. In both of these scenarios, it is a negative thing in my mind, because an actual long-term emotional connection is being subverted.

If other people just like to interact to what amounts to random strangers like this, then that's fine with me. It just has never been for me to want to be that close to someone whom I barely know and whose intentions I basically have no idea about.

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Fun_Breakfast697 · 2024-04-23T01:23:10+00:00

The way I hear casual sex often described here sounds like bitter men fantasizing about how they would act if they could get away with it. But they can't, they can barely even get laid at all, they're definitely not doing any of that shit, nor do they know a single thing about how casual sex actually works.

The hotties by and large have no desire to do any of that shit because they're not simply not bitter enough -- and they also understand that it would be highly likely to backfire. Losers jerking off at home don't have to worry about the consequences of behaviors they will never actually do.

Independent-Mail-227 · 2024-04-23T01:48:42+00:00

doesnt match at all the majority of my experiences.

Have you considered your experiences that you can't even prove make for a poor argument in favor of your point?

-Shes-A-Carnival · 2024-04-24T03:45:57+00:00

when there's warmth and fun at least one party catches feelings and the casual sex turns into an ltr or ends

FreitasAlan · 2024-04-22T06:56:44+00:00

I think it’s more like he’s not showing any sign of respect for her than openly disrespecting her. Men will hardly disrespect someone who’s fucking him for no reason. Even if he despises her. It doesn’t make any sense.

But I see a lot of men fucking women for who they have no respect at all and they don’t pretend to have any respect. They will most of the time describe these women in very negative ways to their friends and share many intimate unnecessary details.

I think these women see these men as high value and that’s it. The sex is supposed to keep him around I guess. The casual aspect is often because these men never showed any intention to commit and never lied about it. Not because one of them has a higher goal in life.

Also, many people are often interleaving partners, which makes the hypothesis of some greater circumstance in life less likely.

wtknight · 2024-04-22T23:49:14+00:00

[permanently deleted]

SmilesRHere · 2024-04-23T02:15:34+00:00

Yep, spot on.

Most people who have casual hookups are as you describe, having fun in the moment.

Think holiday hookup, everyone knows that it is leading no where and is just fun, a one night stand is no different, and casual hookups/dating is the same. There is attraction and desire on both sides, though often not enough for a serious relationship, or in some cases just bad timing / place etc. for a serious relationship.

The “soulless booty” call as you put it, is a very small minority amplified by ignorants and sometimes the perpetrators (probably believing it’s cool), the majority of people who have casual sex / casual dating are just like you.

I grew up in casual dating circles, and continued living my life in the style, none of my friends or people in the circle had “soulless bootycalls”, the exception would be swinging, especially in a club setting where it is just pure sex and nothing more, but even there, after a while people know each other, as the same people tend to be around, we’ve made friends at swinger clubs…

Title	The general perception of casual dating is highly dark tainted
Author	Jazzlike_Worth_9908
Upvotes	1
Comments	35
Date	April 22, 2024 6:40 AM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/1ca3yfk/the_general_perception_of_casual_dating_is_highly/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/the-general-perception-of-casual-dating-is-highly.1516046 https://theredarchive.com/post/1516046

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