My girlfriend is very very sexy and she knows how to turn me on, but sometimes I think she holds that as a power over me

YSLMangoManiac · 2024-04-25T21:51:25+00:00

Say no even if you wanna say yes idk what else you could possibly do

jiva_maya · 2024-04-26T02:03:09+00:00

welcome to earth

bahadurJoe · 2024-04-26T04:18:59+00:00

Control yourself. Problem solved.

The fact she can sexually manipulate and tempt you is power in and of itself. Now, will you buckle to pressure or withstand?

Nyuu_Ftastic · 2024-04-26T02:48:44+00:00

Best way in a relationship is communicating. You should talk about your feeling that this seems to you transactional by her and also show boundaries that this is nothing you want to deal with.

vtribal · 2024-04-26T01:49:25+00:00

flirt with other girls (even better if its in front of her)

the reason you believe she has a power over you is because you are scared to lose her, if you had 1000 women begging for your attention you wouldn't be as concerned with power dynamics

TwoRepresentative465 · 2024-04-26T13:22:26+00:00

Why did you ask for relationship advice on one of the most toxic subs on Reddit lol?

There’s a reason these lads are in this sub and I assure you it isn’t because of their overwhelming success in managing long term relationships.

mredge73 · 2024-04-26T16:09:36+00:00

Weilding sex like a weapon is her superpower. You both know this now. You don't want to totally disarm her if you like it, but at the same time, you want her to channel it for good. Time for a conversation, tell her you don't like being manipulated by sex, it makes sex feel dirty (emotionally) to you.

Several_Ad_8363 · 2024-04-26T09:10:21+00:00

To a certain extent, as a woman, she's also hardwired to expect to leverage her desirability, so I wouldn't be quite as judgemental as some of the other respondents and it's not too bad to give her a win sometimes.

If it's out of control (and as you're posting here I assume it is) and she's umming and ahing about whether or not she wants to come over, then just tell her not to come over because she obviously isn't sure she wants to and you'd rather meet up with your friends instead. She won't respect you or love you if you let her win all the time.

Don't accept a situation where she's hanging around at your place or overnighting and not putting out. Send her home if she's argumentative or degrading you - say "I'm not going to beg, just don't come over if you aren't attracted, I'll call you a taxi." If she already lives with you and she's behaving like this, then I'd ask for advice in another sub, but it's probably holed below the waterline in that case.

cropchoc · 2024-04-26T15:48:29+00:00

Take it or leave it attitude. Its nice to have but its also cool if you don't have it. Don't act pissed off when she "uses it against you", whatever that means. Act like you're fine either way.

If you're feeling the urge, use masturbation to get rid of it. Learning self regulation is very important, for your sexual desire as much as for your emotions.

razama · 2024-04-26T19:00:24+00:00

I can’t control MYSELF and it’s all YOUR fault!

Detail-Realistic · 2024-04-27T12:53:35+00:00

In some ways I think woman try test to see if they can control you with sex, if you crumble and are super easy to control you fail and they lose respect. They want to know they can’t truly manipulate you, that you can joke and tease and stay grounded (don’t get frustrated or perturbed) even if they try push and pull you around a bit.

csgecko · 2024-04-26T14:40:40+00:00

She’s manipulating by withholding brother. Big red flag imo.

TurbulentAardvark345 · 2024-04-25T22:33:35+00:00

You should sleep with other women.

But break up with her first. This isn’t good for you. Maturity is knowing to move away from fucked up situations quickly before they get too much of a hold on your mind. It was easier today than it’s ever going to be

hahajoshxd · 2024-04-26T10:36:58+00:00

Who gives a shit? What is this leverage to which you’re referring and why does it mean a thing to you. I believe the problem is not your manhood and her manipulation thereof, but that you’re insecure and afraid to lose her. Concern yourself with something actually meaningful and she won’t have the grounds to withhold herself from you.

Alternatively, in the case that she is indeed out of your league and you simply don’t have the means to withhold from her, enjoy the chase and the “very very sexy” gf as that doesn’t strike me as the worst way one could spend their time on this rock.

tabooforme · 2024-04-26T14:24:06+00:00

Either accept it or leave. She knows how to use it and as long as she has it always will. Sex is the most powerful emotion ever, just ask Adam.

Additional_Don · 2024-04-26T15:08:49+00:00

She has to know that you're willing to sleep with other women, she has to know that you have the power to replace her. She has to know that she has cannot control you and the only thing she can give you is sex. She has to go back to her place.

Otherwise you'll stay weak like this and trust, she will leave you.

Kagenikakushiteru · 2024-04-26T15:52:54+00:00

Any girl who weaponises sex is not a keeper. Sex is a mutually happy thing that’s all. It’s not doing a favour for someone or trying to extract something from it. I block then delete (to ensure I don’t contact them in a moment of weakness)

iLazerBolt · 2024-04-26T16:20:03+00:00

Need to keep an abundance mindset. Textbook case of oneitis

VisualComment11 · 2024-04-26T22:31:07+00:00

Your girlfriend might be a narcissist. If so the relationship won't last long anyway, you won't have to worry about it.

furezasan · 2024-04-26T04:36:36+00:00

Take estrogen, it's like kryptonite for lady witchcraft

Dandys3107 · 2024-04-26T06:43:23+00:00

Show her that you can control yourself. Also, keep improving your own sex appeal. And if she clearly keeps you blue balled for fun, make it clear that it irritates you and you won't accept such behaviour in the long run.

Title	My girlfriend is very very sexy and she knows how to turn me on, but sometimes I think she holds that as a power over me
Author	PsychologicalRead515
Upvotes	57
Comments	42
Date	April 25, 2024 9:38 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1cd3lpr/my_girlfriend_is_very_very_sexy_and_she_knows_how/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/my-girlfriend-is-very-very-sexy-and-she-knows-how.1516409 https://theredarchive.com/post/1516409

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