What Am I Missing?

DaygameCode · 2024-06-06T18:45:59+00:00

You are missing:

The ability to generate sexual tension, make women feel intense emotions, the ability to connect with women emotionally, the ability to make them fantasise about you and get horny.

In other words, while you may have worked on yourself, you haven’t worked on the actual seduction skills in your interactions with women face to face.

You simply don’t know yet how attraction works, and all you’ve done is work towards becoming a great provider, but forgot that attraction comes before being a provider.

This is evident by the fact that you approach women face to face and the only thing you do is trying to get their number like most noobs. A face to face interaction in a bar should end in your bed at your place, not in a phone number. And yet you keep going for numbers hoping to deal the deal later.

You worked towards being everything a woman may want, but without the ability to use your social skills to get them interested.

Conclusion: You have everything except verbal game.

fondlemysausage · 2024-06-06T14:09:06+00:00

There isn't some "checklist" you have in your journal where the end result is "get a girlfriend." It's so strange how often I see this. Guys list "I have this, this and this, where's my GF?" when it's not about that. You could have all of these things and still have the charisma of a toilet and it won't get you anywhere (not saying you do, just an example).

I'm not saying what your doing doesn't help. It does, but there are usually stereotypes with guys that have your mindset, those being you are self absorbed and lack empathy and compassion since you've poured a ton of time into yourself. The same reason women who are attractive by societies' standards are often stereotyped as boring, full of themselves. It's up to YOU to break out of that mold.

Chicagoj1563 · 2024-06-06T16:04:29+00:00

You’re missing social skills. That’s what you need to improve. You have to interact with lots of women and learn what they respond to and how to trigger attraction. All those other things you listed doesn’t fix that.

MrAnonPoster · 2024-06-06T18:59:10+00:00

You are wed to the outcome thus you triangulate too much, justify too much and telegraph your neediness.

Ok-War-113 · 2024-06-07T04:28:44+00:00

Start with a book how win friends and influence people.

Practice daily, small interactions with random people just to get the reps in .

Overtime you will build charisma and you will find that people will gravitate towards you . This is not a fast process so allow some time.

But this will work only if you put the reps in …

Good luck .

garnageman · 2024-06-06T13:52:54+00:00

You're right, most women don't care about your career, hobbies, fitness, or style. All of that is for you, to make you a "real" person who has a life.

When talking to women you need to share deeper stuff, things that elicit an "emotional" response. Open up about your childhood, your past, events and situations that affected you deeply as a person. Don't shy away from shocking or traumatic stuff (although if its too intense you may want to save it until you know them better).

Doing this will let them know that its safe for them to open up too and thats how you both build a genuine connection.

Granted some women will care about your hobbies and career and that may be the thing that helps you connect with them, but dont talk about it on a surface level. Talk about what led you to pick up that hobby or the journey that led to your career. If its hard to share for whatever reason, thats good, women will see that youre bold enough to talk about the hard parts of your life and that you really dont care what other people think, which is attractive.

appolonysian · 2024-06-06T14:46:04+00:00

All the flashy titles and wealth are only ever helpful in getting your foot in the door more often than you might otherwise get a chance to.

The real seductive aspects of a man are his confidence, social savvy, and ability to connect with a woman emotionally.

If you don’t have those, your wealth won’t be that much help (unless you’re ok with gold diggers). There are plenty of rich people with miserable love lives.

Elbynerual · 2024-06-06T20:34:16+00:00

none of them care about my career, hobbies, fitness, style, or anything I was told women look for.

Sounds like you're a salesman trying to sell yourself, when in reality you need shut up and let the girl speak while you actively listen. Try to let them do all the talking.

SaaSWriters · 2024-06-06T20:39:03+00:00

none of them care about my career, hobbies, fitness, style, or anything I was told women look for.

You are correct. It's good that you have come to this realization.

We'll look deeper into what you need. But first, what do you want from these women?

Dandys3107 · 2024-06-07T12:35:31+00:00

You need to be a lot more specific about your method to receive some constructive guidance. And women are not after attractive traits, but after sexually attractive male.

Ivory1321 · 2024-06-06T13:33:16+00:00

Hard to say, I think when talking to women (or anyone for that matter) outward presentation is really important.
How do you carry yourself, does your fitness show in ways of wide shoulders or big arms, do you wear nice clothes that make you look good, do you groom your face, hair and beard properly, do you smell nice.
If you present boring or like you don't take care of yourself that will dampen initial interest. Now you don't have to look extraordinary or anything, but just presenting "good" will work wonders, especially if you aren't particularly charismatic or flirty it can carry some weight.

omega05 · 2024-06-06T14:04:39+00:00

The problem is you've listed everything on paper (gym, nice job, good money, travels) but not your personality. Are you fun to be around, do they feel safe and comfortable around you, do you smile? Do you have a crew you go out with?

adamparkar12 · 2024-06-06T18:57:38+00:00

cold approach without fear

Title	What Am I Missing?
Author	Velociraptor2018
Upvotes	22
Comments	43
Date	June 6, 2024 1:06 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/seduction
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/seduction/comments/1d9hper/what_am_i_missing/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/seduction/what-am-i-missing.1520710 https://theredarchive.com/post/1520710

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