I'll start. Add "right now" to anything your wife says. I don't know who came up with it but I heard it on a Rian Stone video. I had real issues handling my wifes emotional tantrums and this tip really helped me once I internalized it. It's no big thing but it removes the huge discrepancy between how me and my wife thinks. I used to take anything she said to heart because I thought she worked like me and only said stuff she really thinks instead of blurting out emotions.