How long does it take to your financial future back on track?

Results_Coach_MM · 2024-10-08T21:31:31+00:00

It's all about finding out your passion and your purpose again and going after that with a one track mind and focus.

Age really doesn't matter, you have more experience and knowledge than when you first started out in your 20s, so you can reach your goals very quickly. Time is relative to the amount of work you put in.

If you set yourself up with the right goal, you can actually be in a much better position than when you first started too.

So the question you may want to consider for yourself is:

What do I want the most right now?
Why do I actually want that?
What happens if I don't get that?

Taking the time to figure out exactly what you want will make it much easier for you to work out where you need go next.

techrmd3 · 2024-10-08T21:03:42+00:00

in round figures 3 years

factors:

how much you paid lawyers during the divorce proceedings
amount of temp spousal support/alimony
amount of spousal/alimony after divorce finalized
expense of alternate living accommodations
expense of reallocation of any assets like 401k pension ect
and the killer the amount of debt you take on early in divorce proceedings and post divorce

best advice is clamp down on spending until year 3 when you get to a steady state, then do the travel and get the sports car if you want.

in your case I would really get your lawyer to make your final decree air tight and document all the moving expenses as "funds in excess of agreed division" you say 50/50 which means 50% no extras if you want credit in any future litigation you have to document it legally

Also I would actually turn this adversarial to make sure your wife has counsel and can't re-litigate this claiming ignorance

for example you say "she needs more initially" and "you will have more money after divorce per month"

What happens when Miss Ex discovers that 50% does not help her month to month and meanwhile you are swimming in monthly income?... I tell you, she drags you into court.

If you have the kind of assets and cash flow you are speaking to - especially if you can pay for the marital home AND help Miss Ex get her own home... it's nearly certain she will try to come back at you when the 50% gets down to 10%... and if you did an "equitable" one attorney deal... any attorney can re-litigate the asset and funds division AGAIN.

You apparently have ample assets and cash

don't be cheap hire a lawyer besides the joint lawyer to look things over... see what they have to say about exposure.

Also hire a financial planner, remember tax impacts like moving from Head of Household/Married to single full tax limited deductions.

Just the Pension issue you are talking about should PROMPT you to get separate counsel.

pk2at · 2024-10-08T20:27:31+00:00

There is really no way to get back to where you were. This is why I have been advising men never to agree for 50-50 and do what it takes to keep your money. For ex. lets say you have saved $2M by 47, lose half of that in divorce, plus $200K in other expenses like fees, alimony, CS etc. You are left with $800K and 20 years to retire. At 7% return you have ~$3M at retirement. If you kept the $2M you have $7.6M or close to $8M. Its not easy to make additional $5M given labor market discrimination against older workers

MartyMcFly7 · 2024-10-08T18:31:07+00:00

I'm about 3 years out of my divorce (no alimony or CS). I also bought our home and took over a much larger mortgage (after having to refi).

Things were tight at first, but got much easier after I started a new relationship and the new GF moved in.

My work retirement is now back to about 95% of what it was. (I got to keep all the contributions made during the divorce, along with all the related gains. The recent stock market increases have also helped.)

I also ended up receiving an inheritence soon after the divorce (that my ex was unable to touch), which helped. And I received several raises since the divorce.

Your wealth was always shared by two people, and living single is always more expensive, so getting back into a relationship has a way of restoring that two-income lifestyle (especially when that person has their own income and savings). In my case, the new GF actually earns about three times what the ex did, so between the two of us, it feels like we're doing pretty well.

Everyone's circumstances will vary, but to answer your question, about 3 years (in my case).

slow-motion-pearls · 2024-10-08T15:44:45+00:00

the futures bleak in tech. i’ve never seen a worse job market. add in mandatory CS and I just don’t see an improvement for years, if at all.

Any-Div-6055 · 2024-10-08T15:23:41+00:00

You left out too many details. The big two are (a) the pension(s) and (b) the housing details.

Housing is all over the place these days. If you're in a hot market, it's a piggy bank. I mean, where I live, a lot of relatively mediocre career people have become millionaires just by buying at the right time. If you're in a slow market and it's an older house, renting could very well be cheaper depending on how well you plan for retirement and how much home maintenance costs. Setting her up with a 30 year mortgage at age 50 is not a slam dunk either. Make sure you understand what "house poor" is and what it can do to lifestyle.

I don't know how you're planning on splitting the pensions. I'm assuming she's working too maybe even at the same workplace. They're best left untouched in my opinion. Keep his and her pensions. Present value is probably nickels on the dollar. And splitting payments until death (or even figure out the beneficiary) would be an absolute nightmare for me ... YMMV. I mean, I'm not even sure what happens if you remarry and pass away. You would presumably want the benefits to go to your wife, not your ex-wife. The solution is simple, kind of. Never remarry.

You really need a financial advisor, not reddit.

hazalo9 · 2024-10-08T15:01:55+00:00

Depends but find a second source of income preferably cash. Cut grass, shovel snow, fix cars. You have to hustle to have extra money. Now you should have more time on your hands so this is doable. It will take time but also the best investment is in yourself and the peace of mind of not having to deal with another person. Treat and buy them things you always wanted and take time to enjoy that single life. Good luck bro!

THX1138-22 · 2024-10-08T13:14:51+00:00

Once I saw how the state/courts could just reach in and take 70% of my assets, I just stopped caring about money. The game is so rigged against middle-class men. It’s as if we are just cattle. Men are made to fight wars for the government, we are worked to the bone by the system, we’re taxed and asked to pay excessive percentages of alimony. Our kids are alienated from us. And on top of that, we are shamed and accused of being “entitled”. Entitled to what exactly? To being societies’ workhorse and then taken out to be shot after we are no longer useful? Men die on average 3 to 5 years earlier than women – – why does no one care about that? The more I look around, the more I see how men are abused and discarded. I firmly believe that women should have equal rights, control over their own bodies, and receive fair pay and have equal opportunities. But I don’t owe them anything more than that. I will firmly support equality for women, but I no longer support preferential advantages for women.

Training_Ad1368 · 2024-10-08T11:24:06+00:00

Look for the very long time benefits since the losses are short term. You will start recovering once you don't have to pay her alimony and she is not your responsibility any more.

Exactly65536 · 2024-10-08T10:10:42+00:00

This question doesn't make a lot of sense, to be honest, because the answer depends on where you were, on your potential and its realization.

And also, "back to where you were" is impossible. If it will take you 10 years to earn what you lost in a divorce, it'll still cost you 10 year. You will not be where you were, you'll be same money, minus 10 years of your total lifetime.

upvotersfortruth · 2024-10-08T09:56:56+00:00

What about alimony and child support? Regardless, it starts day one after the divorce is finalized. As for time, it's hard to estimate because you never know what your new freedom will bring you.

Title	How long does it take to your financial future back on track?
Author	Breed_love2375
Upvotes	17
Comments	17
Date	October 8, 2024 9:41 AM UTC (1 year ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1fyvvqy/how_long_does_it_take_to_your_financial_future/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/how-long-does-it-take-to-your-financial-future.1532444 https://theredarchive.com/post/1532444

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