Ltr on being cold

stonepimpletilists · 2017-03-27T09:36:36+00:00

Now I actually do not care (and I am not faking it).

Then why are you worried about what you should say? Why is making her feel comfortable your #1 option?

JDRoedell · 2017-03-27T13:25:28+00:00

As /u/The_Litz said... her feels, her problem. Women truly are children. Feeling smothered one week because you want to talk to her and then pestering you for not caring enough the next. This is 100% her fucking problem.

I'm a spreadsheet guy. This weekend I got called an asshole 3 times and a selfish dick once. Good week for me. I actually enjoy it now.

AustralianArm · 2017-03-27T06:47:27+00:00

Not sure if this is a comfort shit test or a shit comfort test.

Even though she used to fight with you about wanting pics, secretly I reckon she loved it. It just pushed her boundaries on the slutty side.

And thus, she actually enjoyed that you wanted that kind of thing when she wasn't there. It showed that you were thinking about her.

The_Litz · 2017-03-27T07:20:05+00:00

what is the proper way not to hurt her

Her feelz, her problem. Why are you worried about what she is thinking? With her gone for a few days you do your own thing, if she calls with a shit test, A&A and AM, if she calls with a comfort test, give her a little comfort.

She is probably feeling a little dread now that betaboy is not pining away for her, so I am thinking shit test, but you know your woman better than us so you have to decide what it is.

Edit: It is ok to call her and chat a bit, but do it from a position of power, not need.

Redpillbrigade17 · 2017-03-27T13:08:02+00:00

Sounds like she's a bunch of drama. Why do you put up with it?

FireTempered · 2017-03-27T13:58:32+00:00

You were doing everything right (maybe for the wrong reasons IDK); until you said:

what is the proper way not to hurt her?

Spending your time trying to manage her feelz will turn her lower regions into the Sahara much faster than you can rehydrate them.

As Stony said, why are you trying to make her comfortable?

On the up side, you KNEW you were not doing it right and you have just enough knowledge to suspect it, kind of. With practice this gets better.

Lift, Read, Sidebar. AKA L.R.S. If you find a better way, PM me, or call me collect; we can bottle it and sell it.

Scurvemuch · 2017-03-27T15:10:09+00:00

my ltr is attacking me

and

hat is the proper way not to hurt her

What you are asking is " what is the proper way to not hurt someone \who is attacking me, thereby teaching them that attacking me makes them feel better"

IS t his what you want us to teach you??

blarggggggggggg · 2017-03-27T22:28:49+00:00

Women start up with the "you don't care, you don't love me" accusation blah blah blah.

You are tempted to defend yourself against this unfair portrayal. But she is upset based on a feeling, not on reality. So any facts or evidence you present in such a defense are irrelevant to her. In fact, they may escalate the argument because she thinks you aren't taking her feelings seriously and you think she is not taking your logic seriously. So it just gets worse.

It takes two to have an argument. That's why things like agree and amplify work so well. If she is really sad and feeling you don't care maybe agree and amplify will work, maybe it will aggravate her worse. Just something you need to try.

Or sometimes she says "you don't care blah blah" and you can just say "oh poor honey, are you ok" and then she can vent about her life for a few minutes or something. Just don't become her emotional tampon. In this example you don't agree or disagree with what she's saying, you are just redirecting.

She is going through tough family stuff so she is going to be moody and trying to take it out on you - you will need to be the oak tree.

Ultimately, if she is unsatisfied with the way the relationship is going you need to tell her she is free to leave anytime.

abundance, abundance, abundance.

If you really didn't care next time she is bitchy, you can say, "I do care but I don't have time for this kind of bullshit behavior from you" and hang up. Turn your phone off for a while and hit the gym.

I am dating a very emotional woman right now and I haven't told her about red pill but have told her about my thoughts about male/female differences and dynamic. If she pulls this kind of stuff I just laugh, hug her and say "you are being such a girl."

brasslizzard · 2017-03-28T17:46:22+00:00

She should be jealous of you. Maybe she is. You should show her how much fucking fun you are having without her.

RBuddDwyer · 2017-03-28T23:34:44+00:00

but I jus stopped caring about this... what is the proper way not to hurt her?

Ditch the bitch. You're not married. She'll be over you faster than you'll be over her.

RPShitlord · 2017-03-27T11:52:39+00:00

Why not dump or downgrade her? Someone living with you should be living with you. If she likes to travel alone, she should get her own place.

Title	Ltr on being cold
Author	spanishthrower
Upvotes	0
Comments	26
Date	March 27, 2017 6:36 AM UTC (9 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askMRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/61qlyj/ltr_on_being_cold/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askMRP/ltr-on-being-cold.206350 https://theredarchive.com/post/206350

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