What contraception?

PowerCouple2011 · 2016-04-01T20:50:01+00:00

Getting cut was the best thing I've ever chosen to do. Literally, takes the guesswork out of it.

RPAlternate42 · 2016-04-01T20:45:35+00:00

My wife had her tubes tied.

As for your LTR... use a condom. Never let her control the NC.

Or get snipped.

SOAADDICT · 2016-04-01T21:22:33+00:00

My LTR wants to go off the pill and for us to start using condoms. I told her no way that is happening since I don't want to use them, it's a deal breaker for me.

Why does she want to get off the pill?

If she's experiencing side effects that are impacting her quality of life (nausea, change in menstruation, depression, sever fluid retention, breast pain, migraines, severe acne, decrease in sex drive, etc.) she should try a different pill, not quit all together. There are dozens of different formulations on the market. While one hormonal cocktail might give her, say, mood swings, cystic acne, and a period that only stops for one week a month, another might give her a shorter, lighter period and make her more horny. If she's having severe side effects commanding her to stay on the pill will only encourage her to stop taking it and not tell you.

How long would you take a pill that gave you daily migraines just because someone told you to? Not long I bet. Instead actually be a leader and guide her to go to her doctor and ask to try a different pill, or talk to her MD about an IUD or a hormonal implant.

The new three year implant (marketed as Nexplanon) if the most effective temporary birth control available in the US, and because the dose of hormones is both low and continuous through the day, rather than rising and falling when she takes the pill, it has less side effects for many women.

irateMD · 2016-04-01T22:01:01+00:00

I see a lot of people mention that they monitor their wife's cycle. I know this is only possible if they are not on any hormonal birth control.

There are still monthly fluctuations in libido and physical symptoms on the pill. There's less need to track cycles because it's reliably the same 4 week pattern over and over again.

If it's a specific concern about the pill, take a look at this article. There may be a myth or misconception, or maybe a specific side effect that can be mitigated by switching pills.

Implant - great for women who can't remember to take the pill, but has more side effects

IUD - copper or hormonal have different advantages, less side effects than the pill for most women

Vasectomy - 99.9% effective, very low risk of complications, no impact on testosterone levels or anything like that, best decision I've made in years, can be reversed in majority of cases

Vasalgel - studies have been relatively short-term, not available in most countries, and I wouldn't trust something that can be so easily dissolved, but I'm paranoid about that kind of thing

Tubal ligation - 99% effective (same as the pill, but 10x higher risk pregnancy than vasectomy), more risk of complications than with vasectomy, hard to reverse

Condoms - I hate them, but they work 99% of the time

Rhythm method - stupid unless you kinda want to get pregnant, but not completely ineffective

Testosterone - may affect testicles ability to produce testosterone if used long-term (no good studies that I've seen, but there may be some out there), wouldn't try it without getting semen analysis periodically

Switch to just anal, oral, and toys, no more PIV - 100% effective, wouldn't be my choice

Edit: There are others like the diaphragm that don't matter very much and are uncommonly used because they suck in various ways

stonepimpletilists · 2016-04-01T21:02:11+00:00

Iud. If it's fine the first week, it's the for 5 years

ClubLowlow · 2016-04-01T21:11:04+00:00

Look into IUDs, it's another good option

xjedimindx · 2016-04-02T01:49:14+00:00

IUD was not effective with my wife. I cavemaned it, got it dislodged and got her pregnant. She had a miscarriage and had to get the IUD surgically removed.

We now use condoms until I decide I want a 3rd kid or one of us gets fixed. Probably her, she doesn't want 3 I am open to the idea. If l want a third kid In the future I'm keeping my options open.

TotesMessenger · 2016-04-02T04:51:16+00:00

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Big_Daddy_PDX · 2016-04-02T06:23:33+00:00

Bro, have you seen how horrible women are w/ remembering to take ONE GODDAMN PULL EVERY DAY?!!! And you think you're safe now for some reason? Clue in brother you're already at risk, meanwhile you think you're deep in your own frame.

BluepillProfessor · 2016-04-02T17:46:04+00:00

monitor their wife's cycle. I know this is only possible if they are not on any hormonal birth control.

This is wrong. You can track the cycle with most forms of HBC. Some take away her cycles entirely as you say but most do not.

Birth control:

Norplant contraceptive Implants

If she doesn't want kids for at least 5 years then IUD.

smokecheck1976 · 2016-04-03T01:54:12+00:00

Look, you are young and unmarried. Your birth control is on you. You don't want a little bouncing bundle of joy at this time? I totally understand, but what if your girlfriend changed her mind or took some antibiotics that fouled up the hormonal birth control. It sucks that as men, we realistically only have condoms, but it is what it is.

Always use condoms, always maintain positive control of them. Your girlfriend can do what she wants, whenever she wants.

In my opinion, it is good that she is discussing the issue with you.

RedDreadWolverine · 2016-04-03T12:44:08+00:00

I'm trying to create an army of little wolverines so we use absolutely no contraception.

bornredd · 2016-04-04T20:58:09+00:00

If you're married and not worried about shenanigans, I am loving the IUD for my wife. It is her back on her normal hormonal cycle (read: super horny and into my masculine features) without the condom shenanigans.

over60_stupid_loner · 2016-04-02T01:39:02+00:00

OP, do you think you might be so focused on solving her BC problem, that you have missed the real issue?

Maybe she just hit her biologic baby wall. Whether she knows it or not, she's just got to have it.

Read your post again. Think about it.

Ive_Had_Enuf · 2016-04-02T02:48:47+00:00

My wife was on OrthoTriCyclen for years. Initially we had sex all I wanted. She went off it when we decided to have kid one. Then back on for a few years (no not identifiable change in libido).

Then she went off BC again when we had kid two. After she had our second child her libido hit rock bottom. No sex for a year while she breastfed.

After she stopped breastfeeding, she went back on OrthoTriCyclen - but things were different. She was distant. She has no energy. Sex was just trickle sex - once a month. I was in a bad state as a result. Why didn't she treat me like she did before? What am I doing wrong?

That's what ultimately drove me to the pill. I stopped looking to her for validation. I started focusing on myself. I hit the gym. I read. I got out and did shit. I handled MY shit at home (and let her handle her shit). I started to feel better about myself. I'm healthier and happier than I've been in years. Each day I wake up and think - what improvements can I make on myself and my family.

As for her, well she went off OrthoTriCyclen for about a month because she had some side effects that only recently started occurring: allergies, nausea, lack of energy, etc. Things were great for a period. She was fun. Energetic. Happy. Horny.

But then she PMS'd for like three weeks. The cramps were nonstop. And, as a result, she went back on BC - this time a low hormone dose of Loestrin.

The jury is still out on how this new BC will affect her; however, I've noticed she is back to being lethargic: this week alone she has gone to bed before 8:30 four nights in a row. But I realize that's her issue now. I'm should be focused on me.

Title	What contraception?
Author	Roger_rogerson
Upvotes	2
Comments	54
Date	April 1, 2016 8:35 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/askMRP
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/askMRP/comments/4cxxzn/what_contraception/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/askMRP/what-contraception.207543 https://theredarchive.com/post/207543

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