37F Dating was so easy in my 20s. Why won't men settle for me?

malemedicine · 2020-09-07T13:47:18+00:00

She's got it reversed. In your 20s, options. Girls don't settle.

30s, not so much for women.

Her issue is she's going for men in her age range with high SMV. The moment she gets bitchy, they drop her.

Men got options, she doesn't. 😏

Why do so many women think like this? 🤔

ColonelPrittius · 2020-09-07T13:46:08+00:00

Countless post 30 delusional women are out here thinking, they are still in their 20s, dating has changed and men are the assholes.

NEWS FLASH! You're not worth as much as a 20 something year old and on top of that, you are divorced. Men don't kiss the ground you walk on anymore and take all of your drama, because you're not marriage material anymore.

I have a single guy firend who told me, at this age they (men) don't want to be committed nor tied down anymore.

Good on this guy to give her that red pill, but she doesn't want to take it and that's why she's on Reddit asking other miserable women to prove him wrong.

SoakMyBigCork · 2020-09-07T14:16:13+00:00

It sounds like this last guy alpha widowed her hard. Most of her posts are her whining about him.

It's funny how women will leave out important details like she's a single mom. Also the "disagreement" was she got jealous of a female friend of his. Homie saw where this was heading and exited stage left. I'm sure there was an "it's either her or me" thrown in there somewhere.

Ladies if you're going to tell the story, tell the whole story. But I guess that wouldn't garner the sympathy you're looking for, would it?

Maximum_Afternoon · 2020-09-07T14:16:01+00:00

when I was in my 20s, everyone seemed to work hard to make a relationship work

Translation: in my 20s, guys put up with all my drama and arguments

Yep. Now you're not hot enough for us to make that sacrifice.

DangZagnut · 2020-09-07T14:05:51+00:00

Poor old women don't realize that 30+ isn't 20.

How do they not know this? Or even realize it? Did they think the money just shows up for no reason?

Nathaniel66 · 2020-09-07T14:17:36+00:00

"...in my 20s, everyone seems to work hard to make a relationship works..."

Well, obviously she didn't try hard and changed guys multiple times and now...

T H E W A L L A P P R O A C H E D!

peguy2000 · 2020-09-07T14:20:22+00:00

Why is it so hard to put 1+1 together for women?

RedPill_Dragon · 2020-09-07T15:38:52+00:00

Women think of men as being an unlimited resource. They can use us as they want as there will always be another simp. Then finally, they hit the wall and the men avoid her. She complains, we don't care, it's that easy.

Such women love cats and wine.

Captainbuttman · 2020-09-07T14:43:34+00:00

We just had a disagreement which he felt there's no need to discuss, we just move on.

But if the relationship comes with having to compromise their current lifestyle or even the slightest drama, they just look for another girl.

Notice how she doesn't say just what exactly the disagreement was, or how she inconvenienced him. Not a single example. She totally knows that she did something that was such a massive red flag that not even her hugbox would forgive.

loneliness-inc · 2020-09-07T15:37:27+00:00

the breakup totally turned me upside down coz I don't see it coming and we don't have any major reason to breakup. We just had a disagreement which he felt there's no need to discuss, we just move on.

Unfortunately, I'm in a position in which I know way too much about the inner workings of too many marriages. I can tell you that this is highly unlikely to be the case. Sure, it's possible, but it's very, very improbable.

What's more likely to have happened is that he communicated his dissatisfaction of this, that and the other only to be ignored or dismissed. She likely didn't take him seriously on any of the issues he raised or she had some counter argument that invalidated his concerns in her mind.

Many women do this with their husbands complaints. They aren't necessarily malicious or even intentional, but that doesn't change the fact that this is indeed what they do.

Furthermore, he likely only complains about something that's really bothering him a lot. She OTOH, will nag, complain, criticize etc etc etc over every little stupid thing. This dynamic only adds fuel to the aforementioned dynamic and is one of the reasons why she is unlikely to take him seriously. Because in her mind, each complaint is just a small little thing, not some major nuisance.

Even furthermore, she likely rejected him sexually and wasn't generally pleasant to be around.

Even furthermore, women are more likely to divorce or breakup with men then men with women.

Again, I don't know this particular woman, but I know the dynamics of enough marriages to see certain patterns.

In this context, that one disagreement was merely the straw that broke the camel's back.

spaghetti_hitchens · 2020-09-07T14:45:43+00:00

I am willing to bet the OLD profile of this guy doesn't mention anywhere about wanting a committed relationship and settling down; rather, he's there for fun. So she finds this Chadish guy who she thinks should instantly commit to her, and she sees only what she wants to see: this is her Chad now. When he proves to her that he's the guy his profile probably said he is, she just can't even.

Fattonyisgod · 2020-09-07T15:32:38+00:00

What I love about my generation is that the power balance is being restored and women are so entitled and used to people dealing with their bullshit that they have no idea what to do now. It’s been woven into them for generations and now men are finally realizing we have the same amount of options as they do.

someevilwhitemen · 2020-09-07T15:26:56+00:00

men are waking up in mass !!!!

when the testosterone rush of our puberty and post puberty stop, men just dont want to have to stand these bitches with all of their dramas

even more there is a new one to fuck at every corner

Me2Brah · 2020-09-07T17:41:41+00:00

This is just a case of sour grapes.

When women are in their late teens and 20’s they get off on how easy it is for them to dump a guy and move from relationship to relationship because the power is in their hands.

But then they hit their 30’s and the tables turn, and now men are the ones walking away after the “tiniest” disagreement, they can’t stand it.

Cry me a river, bitch.

42252252 · 2020-09-07T17:59:02+00:00

I love how they'll break up over dumb shit, but when a guy pulls the ejection tab over something he's over reacting. I usually bailed when I heard "Oh I'd never let my husband have/do/own/etc THAT"

"Ew, I can't stand guys who think they should own guns. Like hello, do you know how embarrassing it is? Might as well shout about your tiny weewee." "Cool, see you around."

"Hey what are you doing you need to stay and work this out by accepting my verbal abuse, internalizing it, and changing your life in every way possible to mold your existance to my leisure!!!!"

Adam95x · 2020-09-07T14:07:46+00:00

I kind of feel bad for her, just a little bit. Oh well, poor decisions and actions have consequences

NickTesla2018 · 2020-09-07T16:03:08+00:00

Bwa ha ha. You had plenty of time to get a good man in your 20s while dating Chad instead. Game over. The cats are calling.

Magicus1 · 2020-09-07T14:13:28+00:00

[deleted]

iB0ssiB0ss · 2020-09-07T13:43:08+00:00

Be strong and independent whore

JZSquared · 2020-09-07T17:29:12+00:00

I love the mental gymnastics women perform to avoid any responsibility, or introspection.

Diogenes-- · 2020-09-07T20:30:11+00:00

Women: "Men give up on relationships too easily!"

Also women: files for 80% of divorces

_Nequis_ · 2020-09-07T17:51:48+00:00

Let's not fool ourselves here,we all know that the "no major reason" is code for downplaying a constant stream of nagging and bitching about every little thing most guys don't pay attention to,and that by the time she wanted to talk it out the guy already checked off long ago from the relation.

3HardWay · 2020-09-07T23:51:44+00:00

We just had a disagreement...

This is the whole key. Notice how the hamster can churn out 500 words, but somehow the core of the matter has no elaboration or details.

What she found is that men in their 30s aren't putting up with her drama, whereas, men in their 20s did. Two reasons, she was way more attractive a decade ago, and men hadn't been burned enough a decade ago.

There is no hope for her because her conclusion is WAATGM, rather than what can I change about myself to be better relationship material.

jihocech · 2020-09-07T16:12:42+00:00

My dear, the times, they are changing...

Miserable-Lemon · 2020-09-07T19:53:36+00:00

How can you be so blind of your own value? Of course your male friend is having a blast with the dating scene and you're invisible, you're freaking 37

wathon2 · 2020-09-08T02:14:33+00:00

it's very simple, the hot-crazy matrix.

In her 20s, men will put up w/ her bullshit because they want some prime pussy.

In her 30s, men will not put up with the same bullshit for a used up std ridden roast beef.

GayyFieri · 2020-09-07T18:02:40+00:00

Once women get old they get constantly restless and nothing makes them feel as good as picking fights. Past thirty all they do is argue, bitch and complain. Men want quiet and peace even more than happiness and soon they learn it's just easier to get rid of her and be alone.

'Talking through' fights and compromise doesn't work because she will harangue and pester men until she gets her way in every way all the time. Compromise to a woman means holding off and arguing for another couple of days before giving her what she wants.

Men need to learn to leave these old women. There's always someone younger and better.

quesoburgesa · 2020-09-07T16:03:19+00:00

OLD+MGTOW=LOLz

2020-09-07T17:22:58+00:00

“Settling for you” sounds demeaning to me!

madriverdog · 2020-09-07T19:40:51+00:00

she forgot what men want : food, sex, silence

TheFinalWatcher · 2020-09-08T01:23:33+00:00

She was the side chick and didn't know it.

The-truth-hurts1 · 2020-09-07T20:03:15+00:00

Why do I hear in my head..

You don’t need to change for other people!

Know your worth!

You don’t need to settle for anyone!

Hmm.. apparently those sayings are only meant as excuses for women, not the men by the looks..

kadams3 · 2020-09-07T23:19:55+00:00

I mean, I actually agree with her that dating apps have made maintaining strong relationships a lot harder. But she's crazy if she thinks this isn't so much easier for women to take advantage of.

And then she says about compromising their current lifestyle, which is really her way of saying men who date me need to change. Why? Why change for you? What's so good about you that we should change? And when we change you could just as easily just leave.

Better to stay true to yourself, and if that means being single then so be it. Because women in 2020 fail to present a better option.

Cristoff13 · 2020-09-08T00:16:54+00:00

Even in 30s or older, women still enjoy an advantage in OLD, although not as stark an advantage as in their 20s. This women though seems convinced men have the advantage. A clear sign she's only chasing after the most desirable men.

VeronicaZ1997 · 2020-09-07T20:37:24+00:00

Delusional woman. I did online dating since 1994 on kiss dot come and in APril 1995 I joined match dot come. Christian dating dot com and jew dating dot com, and many others have been around since the 90s! eharmony dot com( 6% of all marriages in USA occurred between people who met on that dating site in 2005-2010), friendster( was a dating site for years) in 2002, POF in 2003, okcupid in January 2004, badoo in 2006, zoosk in 2007, and many many other dating sites in 00s as well. Women were there in the MILLIONS,combined, in the 90s, and in the TENS of MILLIONS in the 00s, and in 2010s you had countless phone dating apps that started in 2007 onwards. So her ''15-20 years ago it wasn't like this'' is BULLSHIT. Every woman I know who is 37 now, they were ALL on dating sites 15-19 years ago,on all of them, since they turned 18. I'm sure she was as well or is the rare weirdo who wasn't unless married young. Hell, I know many women in their 60s now who were on dating sites in the mid-90s when they were in their 30s. She was a CHILD 26 years ago when dating websites became a thing!

Siganid · 2020-09-07T17:51:18+00:00

Dating and sex were easy in her 20's, but she didn't have it together enough for any of them to stick around?

Shocker.

Rex-Holes · 2020-09-08T02:05:51+00:00

The mirror gets harder to look at the more they avoid it. Men are finally waking up and not putting up with woman's games and bullshit. It's quite the paradox that a group of woman have gathered with the same conclusions but yet don't feel the need to to ask themselves if they are worth holding onto.

2020-09-07T21:02:22+00:00

Damn haha, that next to last sentence “they just ...” is exactly how I am in my early 30s. Does she know me? Lmaooo

Gm1156331 · 2020-09-09T14:25:24+00:00

Power swap. Men dominate in their 30s

Gm1156331 · 2020-09-09T14:25:30+00:00

Power swap. Men dominate in their 30s

37F Dating was so easy in my 20s. Why won't men settle for me?

Comments

Reasoning is a tool of the patriarchy!

Title	37F Dating was so easy in my 20s. Why won't men settle for me?
Author	sleepyweaselisawake
Upvotes	558
Comments	121
Date	September 7, 2020 1:34 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen/comments/io7iwa/37f_dating_was_so_easy_in_my_20s_why_wont_men/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen/37f-dating-was-so-easy-in-my-20s-why-wont-men.214988 https://theredarchive.com/post/214988