Should we, as men, pay attention to what a woman says she wants?

[deleted] · 2016-03-27T15:48:20+00:00

I've seen many stories about wives who claim they want a sensitive man who shares equally in the chores and listens to her. Yet the husband of this woman is in a sexless marriage.

Some of these women who claim to want sensitive men stomp their feet wanting attention and validation from men, but tend to be selfish and immature, hence their refusal to have sex with their husbands. They see themselves as the victims of their own marriage, the husband should understand everything they do, do everything they want and they should give nothing in return. So, I don't think these women don't have sex with these men because these men are nice, I think they don't have sex with them because they are selfish and self-centered.

When he changes to become, in her words, "an ass hole", suddenly she can't keep her pants on and she's fucking him constantly.

Because as a selfish and spoiled person, she fears losing him, and starts having sex with him once in a while to make him stay, until he becomes a "good" husband again and then she starts refusing to have sex all over again.

Not all women behave this way, but I must confess many women do.

speed3_freak · 2016-03-27T18:20:30+00:00

Realistically, this is just the point of saying to make sure you keep a look out for non-verbal cues. It's also a lot of the reason that we preach to 'text for logistics only'. You can't have a full conversation with someone purely over text messaging unless you know each other extremely well.

dakru · 2016-03-27T20:04:57+00:00

Should we, as men, pay attention to what a woman says she wants?

Sure, pay attention. Just don't take it uncritically. When her actions don't match her words, take more heed of her actions.

dopesk1 · 2016-03-28T14:23:57+00:00

Best piece of advice i ever heard

"Dont listen to what women say, watch what they do"

MagicGainbow · 2016-03-28T16:26:36+00:00

I'll pay the lip service and agree but when it comes down to it women especially but most people lie to make themselves look better.

Look at this subreddit, full of outliers, I remember one bper the other day saying about how she'd date a man with a small cock...which was a moot point as she admitted she's married to an above-average guy.

Anyone can say anything when they know they will never have to pony up.

Darth_Sin · 2016-03-27T21:03:37+00:00

NO. Pay attention to what women DO, not what they SAY or what they WANT.

TheSandbergPrinciple · 2016-03-27T16:21:08+00:00

I stopped giving a shit about what women say they want and it's worked wonders for me.

If they want some emotional tampon, they have a see of pathetic betas she can use their shoulder to cry on.

Atlas_B_Shruggin · 2016-03-27T17:27:55+00:00

i think you have to know how to INTERPRET what women say they want or it's pointless

example:

I've seen many stories about wives who claim they want a sensitive man who shares equally in the chores and listens to her. Yet the husband of this woman is in a sexless marriage.

what idiot men miss is she means "i want a man who is really attractive and manly and all that other stuff and THEN he: X,Y,Z without it remotely interfering with his other attractive and manly attribute"

despisedlove2 · 2016-03-27T18:38:44+00:00

No.

Pay attention to what she does. What she says and what she actually wants don't have much to do with each other.

LifterofThings · 2016-03-27T21:05:50+00:00

Should we, as men, pay attention to what a woman says she wants?

The unfortunate truth is that the answer is "sometimes". Optimally, you figure out the difference between comfort tests and shit tests. This of course is easier said than done.

Some days I'm so glad I have a vagina :D

energyvolley · 2016-03-27T22:30:22+00:00

deleted ^{^{^What}} ^{^{^is}} ^{^{^this?}}

[deleted] · 2016-03-27T17:31:09+00:00

[permanently deleted]

redmachines · 2016-03-27T17:49:37+00:00

No. Women are passive aggressive and thus nothing they say should taken seriously if you want a healthy relationship with them.

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peanutandmiles · 2016-03-27T17:49:45+00:00

I've known many many men who do this too. All that means is that those men and women are way too immature for me to want to date. That shit just screams drama and I don't want to be a part of it.

FreshFace77 · 2016-03-28T00:29:13+00:00

I really don't feel this is gendered. You really need to watch people's actions before trusting their words, regardless of if they are a man or a woman. It makes no sense to trust someone innately without them pricing they are trustworthy.

Shaenon · 2016-03-28T06:24:43+00:00

"As women, how do you properly ascertain what you think you want with what you really want?"

As men, how do you properly ascertain what you really want?

Assume that women do much the same, except without adding a bunch of extra words because they don't know what "ascertain" means.

Question answered. You're welcome.

LiftWellKitty · 2016-03-28T15:56:45+00:00

When he changes to become, in her words, "an ass hole", suddenly she can't keep her pants on and she's fucking him constantly.

Does it matter that this is done out of fear or duty when it's demanded, or does it only matter that more sex is acquired?

PoopInMyBottom · 2016-03-27T18:56:49+00:00

Yes, you should listen. You should also learn to filter.

sittinginabaralone · 2016-03-27T15:58:55+00:00

Yes, because they aren't lying. I understand the general principle of taking people's actions over their word to hold more weight, but women aren't lying when they say they want something and then won't date/sleep with you. The only piece of information they leave out is the importance of appearance and money.

I've seen many stories about wives who claim they want a sensitive man who shares equally in the chores and listens to her. Yet the husband of this woman is in a sexless marriage. When he changes to become, in her words, "an ass hole", suddenly she can't keep her pants on and she's fucking him constantly.

Have you though? Perhaps the emphasis should be on "stories".

[deleted] · 2016-03-27T17:05:45+00:00

Lots of those women are just young and love drama. Small minded. Townie types.

The ones who say things like "I just wanna meet a good guy that takes me out to dinner! LOL!" but keep getting banged by some dude who asks her if he can borrow $2 to do his laundry.

This particular girl just wants to complain so her and her girlfriends have stuff to bitch about together. They enjoy the common misery they each experience.. it's like those lifetime movies and tv shows.. Or shit you read in Cosmo.

Same thing goes for men when it comes to things like sports. It's just some fantasy element they use for their own dramatic entertainment. The anger one feels when their favorite team lost, or the exuberance of when a favorite team wins the championship.

If you want to play the game with these women: always remember what attracted her to you in the first place. Don't change that. That was your true confident character you were before you met her and you should never change yourself for anyone. Only change yourself FOR yourself or you're lying to yourself.

Listen to her, be with her in the moment and let her express her emotion and I guess "hold her" as my ex girlfriend would say. They just want to be hugged and feel that their perspective is important. If this kind of stuff continues to the point of exhaustion, it's probably time to end the relationship.

BiggerDthanYou · 2016-03-27T17:32:28+00:00

If you are like TRP and go for young and easily impressed insecure women that are too immature to be self aware then yeah it is good advice. But if you go for mature women that are able to think on their own and that can reflect on their actions then you are better off listening to her.

Title	Should we, as men, pay attention to what a woman says she wants?
Author	angels_fan
Upvotes	8
Comments	61
Date	March 27, 2016 3:31 PM UTC (10 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/PurplePillDebate
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/PurplePillDebate/comments/4c5x97/should_we_as_men_pay_attention_to_what_a_woman/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/PurplePillDebate/should-we-as-men-pay-attention-to-what-a-woman.275452 https://theredarchive.com/post/275452

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