Why all the rape jokes??

AnniaT · 2020-10-08T20:44:46+00:00

I was always someone who didn't take jokes very seriously and liked my share of dark humor, however men that constantly make rape jokes are very suspicious and it's a red flag for me. Why would they have a fixation with rape and make fun of it? No.

ASeaOfQuotes · 2020-10-08T21:21:46+00:00

It goes from “locker room talk” to rape jokes to sexual harassment to assault and abuse, there’s no such thing as an innocent joke when it comes at the expense of diminishing consent and autonomy.

Missybanana · 2020-10-08T20:43:07+00:00

If they find rape funny/entertaining... If they can talk about it in a lighthearted way... They're outing themselves at rapists or rapist sympathizers. Cut them out of your life. No one has time for them.

JiltedGroupie · 2020-10-08T20:59:34+00:00

I agree, but this last sentence of yours:

If they don't laugh at jokes about men getting used for money, then they don't need to be telling rape jokes. Personally, I don't find either funny.

I don’t see how those are even remotely comparable...

Hhjjuuy · 2020-10-08T21:07:43+00:00

[deleted]

hypointellectual · 2020-10-08T21:20:04+00:00

Just make them think about being anally raped and they’ll shut right up.

bonnie_no_shame · 2020-10-08T23:07:00+00:00

[deleted]

Kimpractical · 2020-10-08T22:19:11+00:00

Some men try way too hard to be funny and edgy

berned-out · 2020-10-09T05:08:04+00:00

Pro tip: always ask questions when an in appropriate joke comes out. It's going to happen to you in nearly every workplace and school, etcetera. They call it "noodle brain" and you request they explain, no I don't understand, explain it. It kills the joke nearly every time. It will save you grief and frustration as the years go by. I think a Teacher called it "noodle brain" and that's how she deals with inappropriate parents at the meet-the-teacher interactions every year. She deadpans it, please explain. No I don't understand. It works very well. You're not arguing, you're not getting angry, you're lost like Data trying to find the humor. Why do they do it? Because men blurt out whatever gets the bro points. It's a continuous competition they do.

dontcallmeratchet · 2020-10-09T01:19:23+00:00

as a high schooler and a survivor of multiple sexual abuses myself i hate that. and just the general sex jokes too. i was leaning over a table once and a guy asked me "damn whats your body count" like boy mind your business

tynike · 2020-10-09T10:47:26+00:00

Tell me about it. My uncle made a “joke” to an exchange student (M16) they were hosting that a big bottle of speights (beer) is “what you give girls to get them to sleep with you.” I got so upset (especially as a friend had recently been raped in this way) and I replied saying “I don’t appreciate jokes about rape and what you said is encouraging just that, you can’t consent if you’re drunk” I then excused myself and went home. To this day my Aunty thinks I over reacted, and I just don’t get it? Like that’s not funny? A 50 year old man saying that shit. Fucking gross.

TheFeministFox · 2020-10-09T12:34:25+00:00

I feel like people don't understand that you are very well able to appreciate dark humor but draw the line at disgustingly insensitive jokes.

For me, dark humor touches on iffy subjects, but does not cross the line of perpetuating harmful stereotypes and more 'accepted' crimes.

I can laugh about jokes like 'how can you make a dog meow' (which involves freezing it and using a chainsaw) or 'why do cannibals eat clowns'. You know why? Because 1) almost everyone universally agrees that both animal cruelty and cannibalism is sick and unacceptable and 2) it is by far not a common occurrence. There are, of course, exceptions, but these are usually absolute social outcasts, are seen as psychos, sociopaths, etc. It's a big taboo in our society, and I think hardly anyone would accept animal cruelty and to an even lesser extent cannibalism. Making those kind of jokes doesn't serve as a bonding experience over shared toxic opinions.

If you look at misogynistic jokes on the other hand? Not only does what is being joked about affect pretty much half the population, it is also a set of beliefs that the vast, VAST majority of men (and women!) share (to varying degrees). By constantly bringing something up that you're constantly being bombarded with in real life, even in jokes, you strengthen the belief that this is just 'how it is', and you will create a comfortable environment for those who do actually strongly hold those very beliefs. We're lenient with sexism. We let sexist people into our lives, our friend groups, our companies. Try the same one with the topic of the aforementioned cannibalism. And the same happens with racist jokes as well.

There's even studies about how much humor can affect already existing stereotypes. But the idea that 'jokes are just jokes' is way too ingrained in most people's brain, they wouldn't even care.

BlackCatCz · 2020-10-11T04:08:43+00:00

I've called people out on stuff like rape jokes and they say that its just dark humor and I'm too sensitive and should take a joke. Its not a joke! Rape jokes normalize rape as something lighthearted and not as serious and traumatic as it really is. If boys grow up surrounded by rape jokes or any sexist, racist, homophobic, etc. jokes they are going to believe that behavior is ok and actually act on it. I'm sick of "its just a joke" because no it has real consequences normalizing this type of horrific stuff and if girls grow up on these jokes they are going to internalize so much misogyny.

Title	Why all the rape jokes??
Author	SuccessfulAppeal333
Upvotes	238
Comments	31
Date	October 8, 2020 8:37 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/j7l0ca/why_all_the_rape_jokes/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/why-all-the-rape-jokes.311190 https://theredarchive.com/post/311190

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