Sexual Fitness

veruscka · 2021-01-03T17:00:13+00:00

Aside from yoga and floor exercises, the biggest thing for me is how I mentally perceive my body. Am I treasuring it because it’s the vessel I carry myself in? Or am I punishing it when it doesn’t give me what I want/look how I want? Try to have some sympathy for your body, it works really hard for you. 🙂

SamuelaTheThrifty · 2021-01-03T17:22:09+00:00

Honestly, kegels as well as masturbating and trying different ways of giving myself orgasms with and without sex toys.

I taught myself to have better, more powerful and longer lasting orgasms, multiple orgasms, and to control when I orgasm.

Mastering my own orgasm has made me more sexually confident and has reduced my desire to have a sexual partner unless he puts in the effort to give me a great orgasm. I now expect way more from men because I know what kind of pleasure they could unlock for me if they put in the effort.

My advice is to invest in high-quality silicone sex toys. Vibrators, dildos of different girths and lengths, maybe slim butt plugs because they can enhance pleasure for some women. Research before you buy, though.

Also, being in good shape and improving my strength and flexibility really helped my sex life a lot because I could partake in many different sex positions. Of course I’m not in good shape now but I’m trying to get back to that.

Also, actively not suppressing any noises I wanted to make was helpful too.

43rdaccount · 2021-01-03T18:37:47+00:00

the most important aspect of good sex for me is being in the moment/letting go, being relaxed and connected to my body. it's like chasing what it feels like to be on drugs, but i think it's much more valuable to develop this as a habit/mindset to tap into, and to not kind of outsource this to drugs (which can be bad for you!). the following things help:

dancing! it's kind of like practicing that mind body connection. practice in sensuality too. was super meaningful to me as a previously shy and anxious person
as others have said, yoga and meditation. it's important to take care of and put love into your body, with exercise, good health, occasional self-massages while rubbing lotion, oils... really feeling that i am what i do to my body. always trying to sense what my body needs, which allows you to be more sensual
ive been experimenting with like centering myself in my fantasies? as opposed to centering the other/a man.. also, was super meaningful for me to stop using porn and to stop using violent fantasies i used to have

SpringJonesOcean · 2021-01-03T17:36:36+00:00

Yoga to improve strength and flexibility.

lemonhead2709 · 2021-01-03T16:26:47+00:00

Hi! I’m also in this journey. I got a rose quartzo little egg to heal, reading books of tantra and practicing touching my own body with love and affection. Yoga, Pilates, streching exercises or some martial art helps us to feel our bodies and know it better. But I think the most important part is in the mind actually , just letting go of everything that people who hate themselves teaches me about self image ... hug yourself. Anyway, self Love is a very direct path to leveling up cause when we know nothing is better than this feeling and that WE can be the source of it... no need to search for it externally 💕 Sexuality to me is the energy of life , vitality and pleasure with your own body So much more than genitals and fluids production

SadClownProstitute · 2021-01-03T16:05:48+00:00

Jade eggs/yoni eggs for pelvic exercise. It's a bit of a taboo topic because people think it's woo-woo and silly. But I can attest that they have improved my menstrual cramps to where I almost don't have them anymore, helped me identify and isolate the pelvic muscles/movements, immensely improved orgasms (I never had trouble with them before but it wasn't something that ever happened during PIV, mostly just with hands or tongue, but now it's just incredible how many can happen and how easily), and as a result made me feel better about myself overall, sexually and as a woman. It also helped that my partner was very safe, kind, and giving. If the man sucks, this sort of thing is not likely to help.

I heard about kegels a long time ago, but everytime I did them it kind of hurt and made me feel like I had to pee. They felt useless and I sort of felt useless because so many people were touting the benefits of kegels. With these eggs it sort of trains you to identify and use different parts of your pelvis and it doesn't feel at all like kegels do. No pain, no discomfort, but actual results.

I will be fair and point out the downside - in the earlier days I would put them in too often, would remove them before sex, but it would become painfully tight and felt like something was wrong. I have been using menstrual cups for a long time and a similar thing happens if I wear the cup, remove it for sex, then have sex - it becomes impossible to wear the cup afterward. I think it's just too sensitive at that point. So I learnt that these jade eggs should only be worn for an hour or a few hours at a time for exercises, not all day and night like some online claim you should do.

fdslizzybennet · 2021-01-03T22:27:03+00:00

Getting cardio exercise 6 days a week has increased my physical confidence immensely, and by extension my sexual confidence. I also agree with the commenters who have discussed getting sex toys. The Hitachi Magic Wand is my go-to. I've also heard great things about the Womanizer-- I'm thinking about getting one. Paying more for a sex toy is definitely worth it-- cheap vibrators haven't done anything for me.

AyemHerself · 2021-01-04T02:01:47+00:00

I second that book recommendation and several of the commenter's suggestions to masturbate and change your perception of your body.

But what helped me the most was ditching the vibrator. My sex life before was entirely focused on my partner's pleasure because I knew if my orgasm didn't happen I could buzz out three of them later. That made sex less appealing for me. Worse, I looked at entirely too much porn in the past and the continued use of the vibe triggered the desire for more viewing. So that had to go. My own hand gets the job done better even if it takes a little longer.

aquietsword · 2021-01-04T07:19:16+00:00

I belly dance. I feel very "in my power" as a woman when I do, so I love it. Performing kinds ruins that, the male gaze just fucks everything up lol. But I still love dancing solo or with other women!

Federal_Advantage440 · 2021-01-03T22:18:23+00:00

I see a lot of posts about yoga and i really wanna try it out! However, I’m so inflexible, will that improve with yoga or am i just destined to be a tinman all my life lol?

Fun_Sherbet · 2021-01-03T22:17:03+00:00

Dancing and yoga! Sensual dance is so good for us

frogchickenhorse · 2021-01-04T08:23:27+00:00

Drinking lots of water improved my sex life and sex was actually enjoyable. Agree about high quality vibrators and a good massage. I’m going to look into yoga. Thanks girls.

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Phoenix__Rising2018 · 2021-01-05T22:50:53+00:00

I have heard that Pilates strengthens your pelvic floor and makes your orgasms stronger.

I also used to set the mood with candles, music, maybe some incense and then I would get a little bit high and use coconut oil to massage my vulva and then masturbate. The pot really helped me focus on the sensations making the pleasure more intense. (you can also do this with partnered sex)

Title	Sexual Fitness
Author	livelyfire4
Upvotes	111
Comments	31
Date	January 3, 2021 3:51 PM UTC (3 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/FemaleDatingStrategy
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/comments/kpmtjd/sexual_fitness/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/FemaleDatingStrategy/sexual-fitness.360348 https://theredarchive.com/post/360348