I want to date a girl but she is Mormon.

RedPillWonder · 2020-12-10T18:52:59+00:00

I don't think you have any idea how you come across here or what you sound like. It's not a good look.

I always planned to marry a Christian, but she is so hot that I’m considering I should change plans.

So what else would you be willing to discard to get this girl?

u/RedWall92 already quoted you opining about premarital sex. I'm wondering what else would go in the trash bin of your beliefs.

No, you shouldn't ask this girl out. Your beliefs are shaky. Your worldview is lacking, if you even have one. In short, you have extremely weak frame.

A man who knows what he believes (and obviously isn't willing to discard it over a girl) and has an exceedingly strong frame could ask this girl out and potentially mold her and have her adopt his beliefs.

She might reject it, but if so, he simply moves on without a care in the world what she thinks or does, because he knows what he believes, he has a mission in life he pursues, and nothing distracts him from it.

Instead, you're already considering stepping into her world, thinking you have to adapt to her and her beliefs. A strong man would think "If this girl wants me, she has to follow Christ and me. There will be no mormon beliefs in my life."

But you're here seemingly asking for permission to date this girl.

You're not ready. For any girl. Figure out who you are (hopefully in Christ, if you know Him), what you truly believe and will not waver from, find your mission, follow hard after it, and be the best version of you possible.

Then, when you see a woman like this and you like her, invite her along. She follows or she doesn't. She adapts to you or she doesn't.

But if you get so wrapped up in a woman and her approval or acceptance, that you're willing to discard important things to be with them or keep them in your life, brother, you're in trouble.

Also, besides being hot, what else does she have to offer?

From your post, all you have to go on is her looks. As important as attraction is, this is weak.

Put in the work and build yourself up first. My advice is a no on asking her out.

WhereProgressIsMade · 2020-12-10T18:57:00+00:00

From one of your recent posts:

Can I just sleep around a while, go through that phase of youth, and just get it out of my system until I’m ready to settle down?

It will create a lot of baggage you'll have to deal with the rest of your life. One of my girlfriends was a better kisser than my wife and I struggle with those memories sometimes. It would only be 1000x times worse if I had had better sex with someone. Makes me glad I waited for my wedding night and all my memories of sex are with her.

PredestinedPat · 2020-12-10T21:02:56+00:00

Your frame is too weak for you to be dating atm

coachdad8 · 2020-12-10T18:26:31+00:00

"I always planned to marry a Christian, but she is so hot that I’m considering I should change plans."

That's the kind of man you are summed up in one sad statement.

junior_primary_riot · 2020-12-11T03:45:29+00:00

I’m an ex-Mormon female so I can give you some advice. First, if you are hoping for sex it is not likely. The Mormon religion really drives it home to girls that they need to wait until marriage or they are “chewed gum that no one wants”. (Yes, that is what they tell teenage Mormon girls during Sunday school lessons.) If she doesn’t wait to have sex until marriage, there are shameful consequences for her at church. These are very real and very public for her, even though the religion is a cult. She truly cannot see the truth about her religion (cult) and you won’t be able to talk her out of the brainwashing she’s undergone since a young age about her church.

Next, Mormon girls are taught to only marry Mormon boys in the temple. You have to be a member for longer than a year and be interviewed multiple times by local church leaders to even be allowed to go in the temple. You also must give the church 10% of your income as “tithing” to be allowed in the temple. And that is just how you first are allowed in. From there you must jump through a number of hoops to be able to get married in the temple.

Do you see how this scam works? The girls are taught to only marry Mormon boys in the temple so the males have to pay 10% of every single pay check. And that is expected for life because Mormon women are also told they can divorce “unrighteous” husbands. Unrighteous husbands are men who won’t pay 10% of their incomes as tithing to the church.

This girl is probably very attractive because she has been raised Mormon, which has traditional values and typically encourages girls to be feminine with good domestic skills. You might enjoy having dinner with her once or twice. But then she will do as she has been told to do all her life: she will try to convert you to the Mormon religion. (Because remember, the girls are made to feel like a failure if they don’t marry a Mormon boy in the temple.) She will just-so-happen to have you meet the Mormon Missionaries. Once the Mormon missionaries have your name, it will be listed in a book of “potential contacts and converts” for around 4-7 years. They won’t stop coming to your house at random intervals until you move.

Despite all of this hassle, she’s also a co-worker. That fact alone could be incredibly detrimental to your career should something go awry.

r/exMormon or r/Mormon can verify what I have told you and give you further advice to proceed with caution. Mormon girls are adorable but they are looking for husbands and her family may not be welcoming of a non-member boyfriend.

mista_resista · 2020-12-10T20:11:36+00:00

How about no

redarcher99 · 2020-12-11T20:51:06+00:00

She's hot but so is hell. You're not even dating yet and she's already tempting you away from what is right and true and making you question your resolve and weakening your convictions (which are already weak if you're considering it). Dating her will only give her more influence over you.

I've watched this so many times over and missionary dating (or the flirt to convert strategy) never honours God (how could it as it's putting a girl about God's word that tells us not to do this) and very very rarely ends well. Usually it just leads people away from God and loads them up with guilt and baggage, gives them an unequal spouse (2 Corinthians 6:14).

Consider how Joseph fled temptation (Genesis 39), if you think you can't help it maybe you should look for another job. I'd say invite her to church but not date her but my concern is that it sounds like you're already too tempted and being around her more would only make it worse.

redwall92 · 2020-12-10T17:04:57+00:00

I really want to date her and see if it can work

I know the old saying don’t crap where you work

I always planned to marry a Christian, but she is so hot that I’m considering I should change plans

Have you read anything on frame in the RP world? It sounds like you are willing to go against all the "rules" here for a girl.

Sounds like she's already up on a pretty tall pedestal, bud. Use this as a learning experience, and learn how to get rid of that pedestal around her and other women.

Torn4_025 · 2020-12-10T17:57:25+00:00

Even a really hot pussy is just a pussy dude. Nearly every guy runs into a girl hot enough to tempt them into not caring about their other standards including the very important Christian requirement. So the thing is once you date her pulling out of the relationship is going to be harder than you think it is.

You shouldn't ask her out, but if you do make sure to learn well from whatever happens.

michael_1215 · 2020-12-11T09:06:52+00:00

DON'T MARRY HER. But no harm in going to dinner or coffee a couple times. The more you deal with hot girls, the less you pedestalize them. Good chance to practice game and build some confidence.

s9arthur · 2020-12-11T02:42:04+00:00

From having lived in Utah and known a number of Mormons over the years, my advice is to stay away from any woman who is one, unless she's firmly in the "ex-Mormon" category. It's a cult. Politer than Scientologists, but still a cult.

ViroTechnica · 2020-12-11T03:32:48+00:00

Only if you can get her out of that travesty of an ‘organization.’

noisykitten23 · 2020-12-27T19:20:32+00:00

Commenting here because I feel like there is some misunderstanding. I myself am a Mormon. First if we are Christian which by definition means “Someone who follows the teachings of Jesus Christ”. Typically we are very devoted to our beliefs and have a set values we follow closely. To make it clear though no one is FORCED to follow those values and everyone can be dedicated to the extent that the desire and her beliefs are actually probably pretty similar to most Christians. That being said, a lot of members of our church will date non-members and I have done so myself. To me personally it’s important that they have the same values and I’d imagine the same goes for her. If you are just trying to sleep with her I would imagine she would have very little interest. I would advise you to check out the Mormon beliefs on comeuntochrist.org and you will probably see that you guys have different values and possibly levels of commitment to Christianity and therefore I don’t really think it’s worth you pursuing just because you think she’s “hot”. But I wish you the best I think it’s great that you reached out for feedback from this thread. I don’t think there is anything wrong with you desiring such things because everyone has their different ways of believing and commitment but I figured I would drop my advice as someone who pertains to the same religion!

RedPilled-Warrior · 2021-01-07T00:42:18+00:00

Your whole thought process is that 1. She is hot; 2. She is Mormon, but you will overlook that, IF she converts to Christianity or becomes a Christian, and 3. You will date someone where you work. Hmmmm, let me see. No! (this if for future Men who read this post). You stated every reason in your thread. 1. Never date a woman because she is just hot (can she cook? take care of a kid? read? think?; 2. You will be unequally yoked with someone else and chances are you will convert before she does. She is hot, right? 3. Dating someone where you work and want to make that a great career? If it doesn't work out, then what? If she yells you tried to assault or worse, rape her (whatever her definition of rape is), then your career is shot because you are guilty and even if you prove your innocence, your job is over. Just the Warriors thoughts, but consult your Bible for more details! -the Warrior out

N1NJA_CAR1B0U · 2020-12-11T14:19:21+00:00

Dude. What you can life has nothing to do with who you are.

Losingdadbod · 2020-12-10T19:00:32+00:00

Mormons are Christians. Don’t believe the negativity surrounding them. Source: I am a Mormon and very much a Christian.

You don’t have to make such a huge deal about going on a date. Live your standards and encourage her to live hers and have a nice time together.

abominablewaffle · 2020-12-10T19:41:47+00:00

Go for it. I'm an atheist . My partner is an Christian. Been together nearly twenty years. I respect their beliefs and they respects my non beliefs.

If it doesn't work out. At least you tried and had fun.

Title	I want to date a girl but she is Mormon.
Author	allen38173
Upvotes	5
Comments	59
Date	December 10, 2020 4:40 PM UTC (5 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RPChristians
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RPChristians/comments/kainjl/i_want_to_date_a_girl_but_she_is_mormon/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RPChristians/i-want-to-date-a-girl-but-she-is-mormon.589185 https://theredarchive.com/post/589185

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