Want to have high standards but I also miss sex

funky_worms · 2020-01-18T18:59:09+00:00

Wow, good for you for getting out of a bad situation. I get what you mean though. Its been like 6/7 months since my breakup and i miss sex/ cuddling so much. Vibrators are great but they just simply cant replace the feeling of human touch and intimacy. i wont be caught in a fwb situation, and hookups are so empty. It sucks girl. Im with you in solidarity

NoThisIs-Patrick · 2020-01-18T18:49:38+00:00

You just left a relationship a few days ago. If you wait a while the feeling may pass. I don't mean your drive to have sex, but it won't feel as desperate if you wait.

Give yourself a few months to get your head right, and see how you feel then. Your head will be clear again and then you may be in a better position to date.

honestgoing · 2020-01-18T19:41:44+00:00

Not MAYBE a vibrator, definitely a vibrator.

Dildo isn't even a close second. The clitoris is where most of your nerve endings are.

I recommend the magic wand. A little pricey but worth it.

The cuddling thing is hard though. I admit it's one of my favorite things in the world. If anyone has a solution let me know.

quaintlyspoken · 2020-01-18T21:28:31+00:00

Invest in a magic wand vibrator or a vibrator that stimulates your clit and G spot at the same time.

Buy some pillows. A lot of them. Snuggle up with them, make a pillow cocoon, put some between the wall and you on your bed to lean back into. Or giant and small stuffed animals if that makes you feel better.

Ask family and friends for more hugs. Just let them hold you and visa versa. If not them then log onto a dating app like bumble and find other single girls who understand and wouldn't mind sharing purely platonic cuddle time together.

People aren't connected enough physically in society which is one of the reasons breakups are so hard.

Ishouldbewriting83 · 2020-01-18T19:02:24+00:00

Definitely take your time. I was in a similar situation where I left one abuser just to jump into a relationship with another abuser. You definitely need have to be careful with love-bombing. You left a situation where someone was so awful to you you end up thinking the other person is a life raft when really that ship is getting ready to sink too. Everyone on here has different circumstances and is basically trying to avoid the same mistakes. For me, that was not getting married too fast again, especially with someone I never lived with. Or, moving in too fast. I told my new husband I wouldn't marry him until we tried living together for a year, and wouldn't live with him until we had dated for a year. I needed slower. Many women don't advocate moving in together until you are engaged, but I kept a sound head about it (kept all our financials separate and enough money to leave anytime I needed to). That's what I had to do to protect myself. Do what you need to do to protect you. :)

MyGilleyCat · 2020-01-18T19:11:07+00:00

Oof I'm glad you left. Get a vibrator. Honestly you cant really replace intimate sex and cuddling as you know, so if you do not want a fwb, which is totally fine then the truth is while you take time, learn about yourself, and build yourself up you will probably continue to miss those things. Its sucks, but it's ok. If you get a good vibrator it will obviously help with the sex drive a bit, but it will also hopefully help to ensure you are not making decisions because you are horny.

Fatt3stAveng3r · 2020-01-18T19:36:40+00:00

It's only been a few days. You can go without. I have a ridiculously high drive and went two years without sex n could have gone longer. It's gonna be ok! You got this. Congrats for getting out of the relationship, happy you're safe <3

extraacct1234 · 2020-01-18T21:18:20+00:00

You have to give yourself more than a few days. It's the first couple weeks that are the hardest.

You have to learn how to be alone before you can take the time to find a good partner.

hilariouslystated · 2020-01-18T19:27:28+00:00

Does anyone have any good toy suggestions?

Ms_Tilly · 2020-01-19T16:40:04+00:00

I missed sex BAD for months, but not bad enough to go out looking for it. It will pass. You deserve to give yourself the chance to let it pass.

idiosyncraticg1 · 2020-01-19T11:55:45+00:00

Absolutely get a vibrator.

AyemHerself · 2020-01-18T18:39:40+00:00

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