Lay it on me straight--can I have nerdy tendencies and still be feminine, or should I forsake them completely?

FleetingWish · 2017-09-24T23:42:17+00:00

None of those geeky hobbies matters, this is the part that matters:

I mean, take a look at the 10s out there seen on social media. They aren't doing what I'm doing.

You think the world is divided into 2 categories, attractive girls and nerdy girls. You use nerdiness as a way to define yourself, but in addition to that you use it as an excuse to not take better care of yourself. It's not the geekiness that is keeping boys away, it's the letting yourself go. You think boys care that much if a girl is on social media? Of course not, they care that she is a 10.

Let me tell you a secret, attractive girls can be interested in geeky things as well. They are the ones getting all the attention, while you are wearing baggy anime sweatshirts and jeans.

Take better care of yourself.

MetalDevils · 2017-09-24T22:44:20+00:00

Now, I'll admit, I'm a geek. I love reading, watching documentaries and old movies, learning in general...and I am a huge fan of things like anime, Kpop, K/J-fashion, and the likes. I'm also kind of artsy and I like to draw and write. I am also a fan of certain shows and musicals.

I could have written this...and a lot more.

The thing is, none of these things are popular here and I feel like I am a bit of outsider.

This sub doesn't focus on movies, shows, music or anime. There HAVE been discussions about old movies and fashion icons however. This is a sub that focuses on relationship dynamics and personal improvement. In other words, highlighting weaknesses for the sake of then turning them into strengths.

The topics of conversation are general here, but there is no rule that these interests make you unRP.

Lots of guys like it when they can play games with their girlfriend. Nothing you listed makes you inherently undesirable, or so fringe and out of place that men will avoid you.

There's no reason on earth why 'nerdy' and 'feminine' should be treated as mutually exclusive.

Again, this sub doesn't focus on hobbies outside of traditionally feminine ones....because most women don't go through the trouble of considering them. RPW focuses on personal improvement and growth in RP relevant ways.

You are not out of place here, you just may be expecting things from the community that exist outside its scope.

[deleted] · 2017-09-25T11:23:56+00:00

This is a big game you're playing with yourself because it means you don't have to be responsible for your own SMV.

Most of our SMV, as women, is controllable. Plus, you don't have to be a 10 to have a wide range of attractive dating options. If you are so nerdy and smart, you would see the market for what it is and capitalize on your severe advantage, simply for being born a woman.

In one, she was "nerdy", and in the other, she was a "bimbo". The latter received more attention, because she presented herself as more feminine.

I would have chosen "bimbo" too and it's not because it sounds more feminine. It's because it sounds like the girl is dumb and would be easier to manipulate to sex.

I honestly didn't think that being nerdy would matter, as long as I was feminine,

Nerdy doesn't matter as long as you are attractive. Nothing matters as long as you are attractive. Even femininity doesn't matter as long as you are attractive. Do you get it? This is the red pill. Who you are as a person, your character, is only ever in addition to what you look like.

SouthernAthena · 2017-09-26T06:39:06+00:00

Hi, I'm u/SouthernAthena, and I'm a nerd.

Like a real big nerd.

I love to read and write and learn about esoteric things, I used to be obsessed with Lord of the Rings, but I don't play video games.

Being feminine and nerdy are on two separate spectrums. Keep the nerdiness, just learn how to look hot (here's where you take your cues from the bimbos, just don't go too slutty) and talk to all kinds of people. Work on being friendly and sensitive (though I bet you've got that last one down already).

You're an adult. Life isn't actually divided into Jocks and Nerds, Artsy Girls and Preppy Girls. Embrace your interests, because they make you a dynamic human. There's a hot nerdy guy out there somewhere wishing the hot girls he dates actually had something to talk about at the end of the day. Be the hot girl with something to talk about.

[deleted] · 2017-09-24T23:05:44+00:00

I don't know what circles you travel in, but there are plenty of guys that would fall over themselves to date a decently cute girl who has "nerdy" interests (not so much movies/shows, but anime/video games/tabletop games). Pretty sure every guy gamer's dream is to be able to play with his girlfriend. You'll likely have to search for men within the subset of "nerd" in order to find a good match, but these days it's not hard to find fairly attractive nerds. Just be on the alert for those that have addictions or unhealthy spending habits.

Jikira · 2017-09-24T23:10:09+00:00

Nope, I don't believe so. My boyfriend had no idea that I was in to video games and anime until we moved in together. He was very surprised to see all my games and stuff. Your right as long as you stay in shape and keep your self up. You should have no problem.

teaandtalk · 2017-09-24T23:09:15+00:00

Search for 'hot nerd girl' and you'll find thousands of photos of attractive women with nerdy hobbies. Maybe they're not instagram famous, but they're still attractive! And my husband loves playing video games with me, and watching nerdy TV shows, and geeking out over whatever. I think he wishes I were MORE into video games than I am! Our shared interests give us more to talk about together, not less!

anonswede · 2017-09-25T06:54:56+00:00

Okay so you have two different niches, "bimbo" and "nerdy".

Bimbo is the largest niche, so that's going to have the largest sample size who likes that.

Nerdy is a smaller niche, but that niche would be more likely to REALLY like that.

Does that make sense? There's also the time aspect, a bimbo might be what the most men like for short-term relationships but someone nerdy with (shared) interests and a personality for longer relationships.

Don't forsake things that you like, but if you want to gussy up like the "bimbo" that probably can't hurt. There's no rule that says that nerdy girls can't also be bombshells!

ragnarockette · 2017-09-25T14:22:18+00:00

We always say to "work towards being the best version of yourself." The emphasis is usually on best but don't forget that we also say yourself. If yourself loves anime and musicals, and you completely remove them from your life, then you aren't being the best version of yourself. You're being someone else.

Atomicbebe · 2017-09-26T00:09:19+00:00

Is there a link to this social experiment somewhere? I'm curious what nerdy and bimbo look like.

[deleted] · 2017-09-25T18:18:35+00:00

What makes someone valuable is what they have to offer. Your value is determined by how beneficial you are to the other person.

Frankly, I believe that most of the interests that you mentioned here are useless and are a waste of time, some would have a negative impact rather than a positive, because, you could have invested those countless hours watching anime and movies in more reading, or exercising, or doing a productive hobby that would appeal to men like knitting or cooking, or anything else that is productive really.

If i'm to wife up someone i'd really rather that her interests come in line with being beneficial to me, the children, the marriage, The less of everything else the better.

bounce-bounce-drop · 2017-09-25T21:51:02+00:00

The latter received more attention

My OkCupid profile was intended to weed out men. It's not hard to get male attention; it's hard to get the RIGHT male attention. Bimbo attracts the world, nerdy attracts people who share those interests.

Sounds like a good idea to share interests with your partner.

ta1901 · 2017-09-25T22:34:28+00:00

I don't think you have to forsake anything or force yourself into any specific box. Just be you. And find someone who will appreciate you for being you. That's the hard part, and requires work, and good boundaries. But with enough work you can be yourself and find that special someone.

I think I'm still too quiet, though

Why do you think that? If you're an introvert, introverts don't talk that much unless it's something that interests them. Then they can be really chatty! If you want to work on small talk skills than do that but don't totally change yourself. :)

[deleted] · 2017-09-26T22:42:11+00:00

The latter received more attention, because she presented herself as more feminine.

No, it was because she presented herself as being more sexually available. Quality vs. quantity of responses is critical there.

Lay it on me straight--can I have nerdy tendencies and still be feminine

Yes, absolutely.

Title	Lay it on me straight--can I have nerdy tendencies and still be feminine, or should I forsake them completely?
Author	lavenderbroil
Upvotes	7
Comments	27
Date	September 24, 2017 10:05 PM UTC (8 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/RedPillWomen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/RedPillWomen/comments/7286gh/lay_it_on_me_straightcan_i_have_nerdy_tendencies/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/RedPillWomen/lay-it-on-me-straight-can-i-have-nerdy-tendencies.73479 https://theredarchive.com/post/73479

Comments