I didn't realize I'd have trouble dating in my 30s if I chased my dreams in my 20s. I have though. But I didn't miss any opportunities. I'm not a missed opportunity.

ringseller · 2021-08-03T18:17:24+00:00

I realise it's not the topic of this post but I want to point out: the MGTOW subreddits have just been banned. Literally just now. Seems like there's no way to avoid the bans if Reddit has it in for you.

Cyanide-Cookies · 2021-08-03T18:55:14+00:00

And despite what other people are constantly implying, we're not damaged, broken, or past our prime.

Biology and nature say otherwise, but whatever helps you sleep at night I suppose.

WhereProgressIsMade · 2021-08-03T18:52:12+00:00

our general health is better

as long as I ignore all data on weight...

InevitableOwl1 · 2021-08-03T21:31:57+00:00

As soon as I see a woman say "entrepreneur" I immediately get skeptical. It may be sexist but most of the time it is a MLM pyramid scheme, working in beauty as a sole trader or (in the last year) onlyfans/camming

So a quick google tells me this woman has set up a publishing company for "marginalised voices". So she spent her 20s "pursuing her career" to end up in a very niche and not very lucrative business. And is lamenting her lack of dating success

This entire article is cope because she is wondering "was it worth it?" and probably knows the sad answer.

All the statements she mad are the reverse. She is a missed opportunity and is past her prime. And it is highly unlikely she will be a mother

Edit: Just noticed it was from 2015. So she is 42 or 43 now. I am glad I didn't boldly make a claim about her never getting married either - she appears to be getting married this November. At 43. So I was right about the mom part

imdaad_khan · 2021-08-03T20:37:33+00:00

I'm trusting because we spent years running down our dreams, we grew into strong partners and parents—we grew into the women we wanted to become.

Too bad, you couldn’t become the women that men would actually want.

anonyree · 2021-08-03T18:50:04+00:00

She has a wedding planned is about 43 now.

houseoftolstoy · 2021-08-03T20:49:58+00:00

I didn't realize I'd have trouble dating in my 30s if I chased my dreams in my 20s. I have though. As an entrepreneur, I've had more opportunities to grow as a businesswoman than I have had opportunities to fall in love.

Shock of all shocks, you cannot have it all. Being an entrepreneur takes a lot of time and dedication, more than the typical 40 hour work week. If she indeed pursued this to the fullest extent, she left herself with little time to seek a man who was husband material, as that also takes time. There are no guarantees how long it will take to find such a man for a woman who wants to be married, so delaying when she takes that search seriously means delaying the date for when she would finally be married. If she is to get married all, because it is not as if marriage minded men want to wait around until you are finally ready to get started. Especially if you are delaying getting serious during the best years you have to offer a man.

A side note about her being an "entrepreneur"; at the bottom of the article it states that she started a non-profit. A bit different than the usual word association with starting a business or creating a new product, but perhaps it technically fits the definition. Either way, she spent her 20s focusing on this rather than prioritizing the idea of getting married and having a family. The ironic thing is that had she reversed the order, she could have had her marriage and family when she was younger and started that venture when she was older and her children were old enough to be at least relatively independent. But she like many other women swallowed the feminist propaganda of having "career" being what you should prioritize first and foremost ("Because men can do that, so why can't women?").

Even if she can still have children at 37 and beyond, that does not change that she is starting from square 1 in having a husband and family. Even if she is able to expedite the process of finding a man to marry and have a family with (1 year for the marriage and starting having children right away), that puts her very close to 40 having her first child. And even if everything goes her way, having your first infants to care for in your late 30s/early 40s is by no means ideal in being able to have energy and fitness deal with those challenges. At the very least she is open to the idea of adoption, as that may be her best chance at having a family. But all of this is the ideal scenario, and that becomes harder and harder as she gets older. Also, her picture does not show me a woman at the peak of health and fitness, so she also has that going against her too when it comes to the dating market.

This woman is but another cautionary tale for women. Delay seeking a man for marriage too long, and you might find out that the man you thought would be there for you is not waiting for you. Being marriage minded means seeking marriage as a top priority, and this woman showed that she was not that kind of woman. She may have had that as something she wanted, but she chose starting her non-profit as her top priority.

HLFML · 2021-08-03T21:17:48+00:00

Men don’t want women in their mid 30s who have made no effort be half of an effective marriage. No amount of articles is going to change that fact.

Every person can make choices for themselves. Expecting men to be waiting around for something they keep telling women they don’t want is stupid, but it’s a choice you are free to make.

yellomachine · 2021-08-03T19:56:36+00:00

She chased hawt cawk, and didn't miss a single opportunity to get it. She must be high value, boys!

nitro-666 · 2021-08-03T21:14:29+00:00

All this articles sound the same. Same tone, same thoughts, same lack of insight. There's no need of writing new ones, they just can reuse them time and time again.

bilged · 2021-08-03T20:59:58+00:00

I wonder what her view of a woman who did the reverse would be? Got married mid-20s, raised kids till teens and was now trying to rejoin the workforce. The author would probably (rightly) think it would be a seriously uphill battle for that woman and that if she really wanted a career, she should have started earlier. Its just a simple fact of life - you can't be all things to all people and there are no do-overs.

slipkid223 · 2021-08-03T19:29:24+00:00

That article is 6 years old. I am betting she is still not a "Mrs and a Mom"

Aaod · 2021-08-04T01:29:56+00:00

And there has been research data proving that while yes, after 35 chances of abnormalities rise, the real data is that at my age, 37, my eggs are still good. I haven't missed my window.

https://youtu.be/spqDzX7UDIA?t=27

Keep telling yourself that.

ayhme · 2021-08-04T02:46:34+00:00

the real data is that at my age, 37, my eggs are still good

What f*cked up data is she looking at? 🤔

manfrom-nantucket · 2021-08-04T15:19:54+00:00

This is basically ECON 101 - you cannot have your cake and eat it too. Any decision you make has a loss of opportunity. For example, I can either study for the finals or attend the party. I cannot do both. So if I decide to study I lose the opportunity of attending the party. If I attend the party I lose the opportunity to study for the finals and run the risk of getting a failing grade.

Same thing happened with this chick. She chose to chase her dreams and in doing so lost the opportunity of marriage, children and family. End of story.

surbian · 2021-08-04T16:16:04+00:00

I am a little sad, but mostly DGAF. If conservatives were smart we would all jump from these social media platforms and form our own. I work in tech so I know that it isn’t that we don’t have the skill sets. We are just weak cowards.

88Double · 2021-08-05T03:22:20+00:00

Jay tell it like it is and she gets offended. Be like Jay lads, be like Jay

me-dgaf · 2021-08-04T05:12:18+00:00

All the things she mentioned...have zero value to most men.

Past use date...none of the other things matter.

jmpires · 2021-08-04T07:09:27+00:00

The Burnout Specialist and Enpowerment Guru seems a bit burnt and powerless about this

Ivan_The_Reddish · 2021-08-04T14:30:47+00:00

God, this article is just 100% pure Copium.

3HardWay · 2021-08-04T19:27:09+00:00

I told him that I'm well aware of my age and the fact that I have a smaller percentage of bearing my own children than I did when I was younger. But that doesn't change the fact that I still look forward to trying for marriage and my own children. And, if my body can't conceive, I still look forward to raising a family with the right man.

Interesting that she views having a kid as a binary. No thought at all about the statistical probabilities of birth defects and adverse health.

WakandaForneverr · 2021-08-05T00:12:28+00:00

TLDR dont be too honest with her, a girl needs to dream when she has nothing else

beatstorelax · 2021-08-05T11:43:27+00:00

i'm no doctor, but isnt 37 already old to have kids?

ringseller · 2021-08-05T15:25:07+00:00

[permanently deleted]

mc_md · 2021-08-07T20:00:41+00:00

It’s all a big cope

Title	I didn't realize I'd have trouble dating in my 30s if I chased my dreams in my 20s. I have though. But I didn't miss any opportunities. I'm not a missed opportunity.
Author	ringseller
Upvotes	169
Comments	75
Date	August 3, 2021 6:15 PM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen/comments/ox9cvo/i_didnt_realize_id_have_trouble_dating_in_my_30s/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/WhereAreAllTheGoodMen/i-didnt-realize-id-have-trouble-dating-in-my-30s.796638 https://theredarchive.com/post/796638

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