"and record everything."

Striking-Trainer8148 · 2022-04-13T00:55:36+00:00

Her attorney is going to tell her the easiest and cheapest way to do this is by getting you put in jail. Once you're in jail she is basically guaranteed your paycheck, your house, your kids, and your pension/retirement fund . Not a bad deal for screwing over the person she's already cheated on, huh?

To achieve this, she will make ambiguous accusations that are hard to fight against.

"He uses an aggressive tone of voice when speaking to me"

"He yells at the kids for no reason. I am scared for their safety."

You need to record everything to capture things she says that you can use against her.

Examples: "If you don't do as I say right now I'll call the cops and say you raped me"

"You're going to sign this agreement that gives up your kids or I'll hit myself with this pan and say you did it."

You also want to document her instigating confrontation and provoking you.

Your wife is in a position where 2-3 hours of convincing acting will net her 10s or 100s of thousands of dollars in assets and saved legal fees. These things will happen no matter how amicable you think the destruction of your life is going to be.

The deck is stacked against you and it seems like everyone knows it but you. Get caught up or get caught out.

SudetenNachkomme · 2022-04-13T02:25:38+00:00

You’re put in the impossible position of having to prove a negative by default. Record everything (especially arguments) to build up your own credibility in court. Be consistent to the truth. Let her dig her own grave.

Don’t expect to come out on top though. This will be a hard road ahead, but you will save yourself so much potential damage just by being prepared.

Prior to my divorce my unstable ex threatened and ranted constantly. I saved texts and by the time I filed had over a year of audio saved up. I was thankful to have it, and I’m sure it saved me so much more trouble than I experienced during that process. Even so, I had to go through false accusations of domestic violence, restraining orders, etc. But in the end I still got 50/50 custody of our kids. It can be done.

Hang tight and ABR (always be recording). Stay safe.

yeldellmedia · 2022-04-13T02:30:03+00:00

You are recording to prevent false rape/domestic violence charges!!! Anything else is a bonus

Sufficient_Orange_34 · 2022-04-13T02:52:01+00:00

Thanks everyone. I gotta say I would have never guessed the extent of depravity and desperation people sink to during divorce. Crazy. I'm worried. I don't know if I have the strength to fight so much bullshit.

ferrisb1986 · 2022-04-13T23:51:12+00:00

Because as a male, you are guilty until proven innocent. That’s the fact, and you will soon learn it.

Gattsama · 2022-04-13T07:12:32+00:00

Confirm the laws in your state, you can not record conversations without permission in some areas. Let me also add that not every divorce is a horry story. There are people that set down, work things out, file and only have a lawyer review it and done. $1k and civil. These are rare, but they do happen. But it's best to prepare for a scorched earth war, and then never launch the nukes; then hope for her to be civil and then try to catch up.

Remember, she has been lying to you and fucking other/s. She is more than capable of lying and hurting you if it benefits her. So she might not do so, but she can do so. ALWAYS remain calm (google grey rock), document everything, and prepare for the worst while hoping for the best. Stay safe out there...

ijustdontcare74 · 2022-04-13T12:24:47+00:00

The recording is to prevent false accusations of DV, which is the female go-to strategy when they get caught cheating and divorce is inbound. They use false DV claims to get you out of the house and on the defensive. She will lie and lie and lie again about her cheating, so getting that stuff recorded is good (as long as it's legal where you are...your lawyer can advise).

CRobinsFly · 2022-04-13T01:57:40+00:00

Definitely record everything. It cannot hurt you and you could always choose to not use it if you have it, but the converse isnt true.

I'm currently litigating against a former employer and without the recordings I have I almost wouldnt have a case... because it'd be my word against theirs.

traderjoesbeforehoes · 2022-04-14T14:06:04+00:00

if legal in your state, record everything because when she claims you are abusing her and put your hands on her, it will be your only defense. and if you think "she wouldnt ever do that" we all thought that at one time.

Seemedlikefun · 2022-04-14T18:56:13+00:00

Look up clueless alien syndrome. It will help you understand the malevolent entity who's sole purpose is to inflict as much pain and destruction upon you as possible.

Title	"and record everything."
Author	Sufficient_Orange_34
Upvotes	10
Comments	28
Date	April 13, 2022 12:47 AM UTC (4 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/u2dw89/and_record_everything/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/and-record-everything.1112886 https://theredarchive.com/post/1112886

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