Child Support Payment Options

ApricotWorking8983 · 2025-06-07T11:21:39+00:00

Your not overreacting I also want zero connection with STBXW.

47omek · 2024-03-04T18:29:46+00:00

Unlike some here I actually prefer paying mommy support through the state agency (and you shouldn't be paying anything without a court order to do so mind you) as there's complete tracking and she can't go back and claim you didn't pay. However if you can avoid wage garnishment you should as you often end up overpaying - I do a monthly EFT to the Texas State Disbursement Unit (SDU) which if something changes I can IMMEDIATELY stop/change payments instead of waiting around for the state office and my work's HR department to probably overcharge me which would be nigh-impossible to recover from the ex after the fact. There's a stipulation in my divorce decree that if I fall behind in mommy support they will enter an order for wage garnishment but I haven't fallen behind to this point. Maybe you could get your STBX to agree to something similar.

jimsmythee · 2024-03-04T18:24:35+00:00

NO!

Let the court do the "Support clearinghouse" and do a wage garnishment. Or send the money to the support clearinghouse via their web portal.

Keep the court in it. And keep the evidence.

Why? It's because in most states they have a clause, "Any support paid outside of the support clearinghouse will be considered a gift."

And then she can take you back to court 2 years later and say, "But these were all gifts!" And the judge will say, "Agreed! You owe back child support of thousands and thousands of dollars."

Is0prene · 2024-03-04T11:01:16+00:00

Absolutely do not transfer money into a joint checking account. Either write a personal check, or use an app like zelle, venmo, etc with a description of reason for payment. My attorney warned me if my ex ever wanted to, should could fight the courts that she never got her child support since it was a "joint account" and make me back pay again all those months I did it that way.

Close all joint accounts and make sure you have separate checking accounts. This is very important. Some states make child support go through the state and mandatorily deduct it from your check at work. They then pay your ex with it. If you are in one of those states they may make you back pay the child support and you will have no proof you already paid it because they wont accept joint checking money transfers. They will accept the forms I listed as proof of payment.

andvue27 · 2024-03-04T07:11:26+00:00

You want as “little connective tissue as possible” yet want to maintain a joint account with her?

SpacemanLost · 2024-03-04T02:35:42+00:00

Ok, you are not divorced yet.

Do you have an attorney? If so, I'd ask them about the best way to handle this.

In the mean time, look at your state's child support guidelines to calculate how much you will likely be paying once the divorce is final. For North Carolina, you can find it at https://ncchildsupport.ncdhhs.gov/ecoa/cseGuideLines.htm

Give her this amount, and nothing more. And close the joint account now. At some point you might find it suddenly 'cleaned out' overnight.

Once you are divorced, ALL of your child support payments should go through the state agency handling it (North Carolina Child Support Services / NCDHHS for example). Anything else and she can claim it was a gift and you still owe your regular child support for that time period. She will be responsible for the account it get forwarded onto.

Heavy_Guitar_4848 · 2024-03-04T01:11:02+00:00

Get a voided check from her and have your bank deposit directly in that account

upvotersfortruth · 2024-03-04T00:52:42+00:00

Why would she agree to transferring child support into a joint account? Never seen this before in 15+ years. Payment options are:

You pay her directly (not sure if your work will comply with the direct deposit)
You pay the State child support unit

TechnicalAd5152 · 2024-03-04T00:43:23+00:00

Why would you want to share an account sever all ties with her, but don't let government get involved in your money, my dad had that and at least once a year they'd randomly take double the amount once triple. He'd have to go downtown and wait for hours to talk to someone to fix it

Title	Child Support Payment Options
Author	WildIntroduction8618
Upvotes	4
Comments	17
Date	March 3, 2024 8:56 PM UTC (2 years ago)
Subreddit	Posted in /r/Divorce_Men
Original Link	https://old.reddit.com/r/Divorce_Men/comments/1b5rsj8/child_support_payment_options/
Archive Link	https://theredarchive.com/r/Divorce_Men/child-support-payment-options.1246992 https://theredarchive.com/post/1246992

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